Why are you so rude to people on your profile?

[Chicup]

Honestly I wish I could be more rude in our profile.

I'd love to say in excruciating detail of what we are NOT looking for, mostly because such people waste so much of our time over the years. I'm not talking 'no fatties' or the like but like.......

If you really aren't sure you want to swing and want to just meet so you talk about it more with your spouse who really isn't into it please don't contact us.

The problem of course is how human nature approaches negativity.

[jdavisauto]

Originally Posted by Fox n Hound

The one statement we have seen most is, "no previous fatties" what a shame to make that statement. Diplomacy is worth a kings ransome.

Fox N Hound

Just some common courtesy will go a long way with people. Calling people who is looking at your profile fatties is not a good first impression of the way you think. All that does is show your superficial mentality. One profile on another site said that they don’t want any black race to applied, but they did not say it so nice, they had another word for the black race. This lifestyle is made up of many people, race, shapes and sexual preference. No matter what, there is no reason to be that way in the profiles. Thank god that they are so intelligent that they have no ideal that they are telling us how much that they are lacking in intelligence. It's like they are warning us on how much of an bass sole they really are.

[Pepper & Drew]

Originally Posted by jdavisauto

Why are you so rude to people on your profile?

Same reason why they're rude on the highway, or at the grocery store, or at work....

I blame it on poor social training. Seriously, they're telling you what you need to know. I'm all for owning up to who you are from the very start. If you're an asshole or a bitch, please let me know up front. So, I don't see anything wrong with people not sugar-coating themselves online. Sure as hell saves some time...

Pepper

[BiloxiCouple]

Originally Posted by Fox n Hound

No one has mentioned that some profiles are just not real to start with, just some clown jerking us while they jerk themselves. They just want to see what they can stir up, but maybe we could be wrong.

The one statement we have seen most is, "no previous fatties" what a shame to make that statement. Diplomacy is worth a kings ransome.

Fox N Hound

Alot of profiles are not real. Guys just jerking around. Kids goofing around and so on. You have to filter thru the trash to find the quality.

"no previous fatties" again a statement that gives you an insight into their personalities. Who knows, you may seem them out and about at a club/party and then you know what/who you are dealing with.

Diplomacy. Yep. Swinging is actually a small world and there is no telling when paths may cross whether directly or indirectly. Rumors spread viciously and quickly.

[good times]

Originally Posted by Pepper & Drew

Seriously, they're telling you what you need to know. I'm all for owning up to who you are from the very start. If you're an asshole or a bitch, please let me know up front. So, I don't see anything wrong with people not sugar-coating themselves online. Sure as hell saves some time...

Pepper

Exactly, same reason I have no problem with the people that put gross or unflattering pictures on their profile. great time saver for us.

[realcplub2]

Ahh yes but you are ruling out the beautiful MIND factor....


Sorry couldnt say that with a straight face either... I suppose we are one of the people that piss people off with our profile for one reason.. We expect those that are interested to READ..

We spell out for anyone caring to read what we are and arent into, what we would like to find and what we dont really care for.. and it still draws attention from those that dont bother to read..

And yet, they write back when we write them and ask " you really didnt read the profile did ya?"

[bbarnsworth]

Originally Posted by jdavisauto

One profile on another site said that they don’t want any black race to applied, but they did not say it so nice, they had another word for the black race.

Just yesterday I saw a profile on SLS where the wife in the couple was wearing a confederate flag bikini. They were otherwise an interesting couple, based on the profile. I'm glad she was wearing it because it saved us a little bit of time, and maybe a lot of time. I'm mad that she was wearing it because there's still idiots in this world that think the confederate flag is an innocent display.

Early on, before we actually started swinging, my wife asked me if I'd care if she had sex with a black man. I told her, "Of course not, and you knew that answer already!" I care if she's sexually attracted to the guy, if he's good to her, and if she has a great time with him. Beyond that, he can be from Pluto for all I care.

Profiles often say so much, yet actually say very little. Profiles rarely do a good job of portrayal of a couple. I think they can be a bit useful for quickly filtering out those you definitely do NOT want to have sex with, but not very useful for finding those you do want to have sex with.

[Chicup]

Originally Posted by bbarnsworth

I'm mad that she was wearing it because there's still idiots in this world that think the confederate flag is an innocent display.

I'm proud of US history as a whole, I salute the flag, but I'm not proud of everything done in US history by the government.

I'm sure the same can apply to the confederate flag by thoughtful individuals who can realize that there was more to the confederacy then slavery, and that the civil war was not a war to free the slaves at its core.

I'm not from the south, the confederate flag has no symbolic power over me, and yes a lot of idiots use it as a emblem for their racism, but that does not mean all who it holds meaning to, do so out of malicious intent.

[bbarnsworth]

Originally Posted by Chicup

I'm proud of US history as a whole, I salute the flag, but I'm not proud of everything done in US history by the government.

I'm sure the same can apply to the confederate flag by thoughtful individuals who can realize that there was more to the confederacy then slavery, and that the civil war was not a war to free the slaves at its core.

I'm not from the south, the confederate flag has no symbolic power over me, and yes a lot of idiots use it as a emblem for their racism, but that does not mean all who it holds meaning to, do so out of malicious intent.

100% agreed. Ending slavery became a vehicle to prosecute the civil war. I know that slaves in the northern states were not freed by Lincoln's EO, and not freed until many months after the end of the war. I'm not so much commenting on the confederate flag as part of that history.

Since the civil war, the confederate flag has come to be a very strong symbol for racism in this country. Very. Even if it had no symbolic value for me, not recognizing how painful of a symbol it is for so many in our country would be very shallow and disrespectful of me.

Take another example. The Swastika is in Europe equated to the NSDAP. It's use is outright banned in Germany. However, it has a very long history predating the Nazi party by millenia. Further, the NSDAP wasn't all bad. There were a considerable number of good things that were done prior to the war under the auspices of the NSDAP, especially in economic revival during the depression.

I can not in good conscience wear a swastika and think to myself, "This is ok, because historically the swastika was subverted by the NSDAP anyway, and the NSDAP did do some good things" Likewise, the confederate flag has been subverted and strongly equates to racism in this country. I'm not one for political correctness. I think it's stupid and short sighted. I am one for erasing racism as much as humanly possible.

Contrast; West Baden Springs Hotel near where I live has swastika symbols built into some banisters and floor works on its veranda. The construction predates the NSDAP by some decades. The symbols there are not in any way related to the NSDAP. Attempting to remove them would be extreme political correctness, and a great injustice to the original design of this National Historic Landmark. In some ways, it'd be just as bad as the Taliban's destruction of Buddhist symbols.

Displaying a confederate flag as part of an historical display, say in a museum at the Appomattox Court House National Historic Park is one thing. Displaying the confederate flag as part of a bikini is entirely, completely different and is not innocent of racist overtones.

[jdavisauto]

Originally Posted by Chicup

I'm proud of US history as a whole, I salute the flag, but I'm not proud of everything done in US history by the government.

I'm sure the same can apply to the confederate flag by thoughtful individuals who can realize that there was more to the confederacy then slavery, and that the civil war was not a war to free the slaves at its core.

I'm not from the south, the confederate flag has no symbolic power over me, and yes a lot of idiots use it as a emblem for their racism, but that does not mean all who it holds meaning to, do so out of malicious intent.

I serve in the US Army for over 17 years as a airborne ranger (Once a ranger, always a ranger). When I was in the Army I started to study history and found out a lot about me and the country that I served. One day a private who new how much I love history came up to me and asked me which war was the bloodiest? I told him each and every one. The civil war was so much more then just about slavery. But we can never forget our history that drives this nation into our future. We learn from all of our mistakes from our past to build a better world for our children tomorrow.
I guess the same can be said about our profiles. We read the ones that are rude and learn from them on what not to say. In a way they do have a purposes.

This has gotten deep.

[jdavisauto]

Hay I just found out that we can rate these posts. Come on people start doing some rating.

[two4youinswva]

Originally Posted by jdavisauto

Hay I just found out that we can rate these posts. Come on people start doing some rating.

Looks like you've already received some previous good ratings.

If you hold your cursor over the little green square under your profile info, you'll see that is says you give great advice!

[Spoomonkey]

"What do you mean? We think we are just as attractive as you? Your shitty personality takes you down so far that WE are doing YOU a favor." I would love to send this about two emails into the exchange with such a couple.

Frankly, a profile like that works just as well as people coming to a club with a t-shirt that says "Be Warned! Wife if shallow and hubby will be a drunken asshole within the hour."

There are certainly people who could be a bit more diplomatic in what they say, but there are jerks in real life as well. At least the "good ones" out themselves early for you!

Spoomonkey

[jdavisauto]

Originally Posted by two4youinswva

Looks like you've already received some previous good ratings.

If you hold your cursor over the little green square under your profile info, you'll see that is says you give great advice!

I be damn, you learn something new everyday, Thanks.

[Willing29]

Actually I never noticed this until you pointed it out. I just saw a profile yesterday that stated 'no fat people'. Now that's just plain rude and uncalled for. I understand some people have different things they are looking for but just so 'NO' or disregard the invites. No need to be rude.