Well... that was brief!

jjtrindc · 08-08-2008, 02:51 PM

That's a tough call. We've found similar couples who just don't do email, but were great in person. Personally, I like to have a bit of a dialogue via email or IM, but understand that others just don't have the time. Conversely, we give terrible "phone" -- lol! Neither of us really are great phone talkers. Can't really tell you why...just they way we are. But I always let couples that want to talk on the phone know about that just so they don't get the wrong idea. Ultimately, what matters is if you click in person. Invite them out. If they don't respond or put you off, then you'll know that their short responses really meant they were not interested. Good luck!

SexyRedmondCpl · 08-08-2008, 07:54 PM

Hey, Julie. While I hesitated to share the exact response, I suppose the damage is relatively low if this thread is uncovered, given how we remember of what we write. So our inital message:

Quote:

Hi there - I really loved your profile pics! My husband and I are pretty new to the site and the lifestyle and are looking for fun couples to get to know. If you are open to talking more with us please drop us a line. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Their response:

Quote:

We are not hard core swingers just married for nine years and use this as a way to meet new people Much like you guys are. We have met very few couple that we would have sex with and even fewer we would be friends with. We are interested in a friends first and then see where things go from there

Again, there's something in the tone that bothered both of us, but we might be misreading it. I'd love to hear how others read this.

**good times** · 08-08-2008, 08:42 PM

Wow, it reads totally different to me than your original interpretation. I have to say that I read their actual response more along the lines of, 'sure we would like to meet and see if we click, but no promises'.

2insandiego4u · 08-09-2008, 02:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SexyRedmondCpl

Again, there's something in the tone that bothered both of us, but we might be misreading it. I'd love to hear how others read this.

This does not sound as bad as you originally posted. They just want to take things slow and might be a bit picky, but that response would not deter us from meeting them.

des1re06 · 08-09-2008, 09:26 AM

The whole email thing is difficult. You can't get much "personality" out of a computer.

Yes, they could have termed it better, but they basically want friends first (from what I gather). The way they've phrased it seems like they move slowly. The negativity in regards to meeting few couples they're interested in may carry over to how they act in person, and maybe not. You never know until you setup a meet. You just may be what they've been searching for.

If that's not your thing, then pass.

**LikeMinds321** · 08-09-2008, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SexyRedmondCpl

What we got back was a terse, "Sure we'll chat. But we don't really like a lot of people we meet."

The above statement (from your OP) isn't what they wrote at all. Not even close in my veiw. Since you put it in quotes, I thought it was verbatim and all there was to their reply.

My opinion of how they replied to you is completely different after reading what they actually wrote to you, below:

Quote:

Originally Posted by SexyRedmondCpl

Their response:

We are not hard core swingers just married for nine years and use this as a way to meet new people Much like you guys are. We have met very few couple that we would have sex with and even fewer we would be friends with. We are interested in a friends first and then see where things go from there.

After a reply like this, we'd have no reservations about getting together with these folks IF we were a "friends first" swinger couple.

LM

**fun4Ds** · 08-09-2008, 11:06 AM

O.k. Looking at the response, without reading others viewpoint on purpose. I see and hear....

"We are interested in getting together some time. We would like to meet on neutral ground first, without the intension's of hooking up. But ya never know."

So to get back with them. I think of meeting somewhere public. Not a club or party but rather, finding out what they like to do together in a recreational setting. So I guess I would be asking " Do you guys Bowl, go to concerts, maybe do a little sight seeing around town somewhere new..... maybe a local festival going on, I don't know.... Something we could interact as couples ... and get to know each other.

Now I'm going to go back and read what everyone els thought

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08-08-2008, 02:51 PM	#16 (permalink)
jjtrindc Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 182 Location: Washington DC/NoVA Status: Couple SLS Name:jjtrindc	Re: Well... that was brief! That's a tough call. We've found similar couples who just don't do email, but were great in person. Personally, I like to have a bit of a dialogue via email or IM, but understand that others just don't have the time. Conversely, we give terrible "phone" -- lol! Neither of us really are great phone talkers. Can't really tell you why...just they way we are. But I always let couples that want to talk on the phone know about that just so they don't get the wrong idea. Ultimately, what matters is if you click in person. Invite them out. If they don't respond or put you off, then you'll know that their short responses really meant they were not interested. Good luck!

08-08-2008, 08:42 PM	#18 (permalink)
good times Mod Squad Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 6,400 Location: Reno, Nevada Status: Married to Mrs Good Times SLS Name:randp	Re: Well... that was brief! Wow, it reads totally different to me than your original interpretation. I have to say that I read their actual response more along the lines of, 'sure we would like to meet and see if we click, but no promises'. __________________ R (He is R, she is P)

08-09-2008, 09:26 AM	#20 (permalink)
des1re06 Great Times 1 Year Exp. Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,079 Location: East TN Status: Couple SLS Name:Des1re06	Re: Well... that was brief! The whole email thing is difficult. You can't get much "personality" out of a computer. Yes, they could have termed it better, but they basically want friends first (from what I gather). The way they've phrased it seems like they move slowly. The negativity in regards to meeting few couples they're interested in may carry over to how they act in person, and maybe not. You never know until you setup a meet. You just may be what they've been searching for. If that's not your thing, then pass.

08-09-2008, 11:06 AM	#22 (permalink)
fun4Ds Julie's Helper Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 2,822 Location: Indiana. Status: couple SLS Name:mrmrsfun Blog Entries: 15	Re: Well... that was brief! O.k. Looking at the response, without reading others viewpoint on purpose. I see and hear.... "We are interested in getting together some time. We would like to meet on neutral ground first, without the intension's of hooking up. But ya never know." So to get back with them. I think of meeting somewhere public. Not a club or party but rather, finding out what they like to do together in a recreational setting. So I guess I would be asking " Do you guys Bowl, go to concerts, maybe do a little sight seeing around town somewhere new..... maybe a local festival going on, I don't know.... Something we could interact as couples ... and get to know each other. Now I'm going to go back and read what everyone els thought __________________ well... at least we are normal pervs

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