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Chicup

No men swing in our area.

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For the first time in a few years, the Chicups have been looking at profile adds on a limited basis. The idea was if we see a couple that seems to be a 100% fit, we will contact them, but that's about it.

 

Sadly out of 100's in our area, apparently only one such couple exists, because they are one of the only ones where there is apparently a man who swings.

 

There seem to be 100's of women, who proudly show their bodies in various poses, but nary a man to be seen.

 

At first I thought this must be an oversite, but I think I figured it out. These are all single females pretending to be couples in order to contact swinging couples! This is the only think that makes sense. There is no reason not to have some sort of shot of the male UNLESS THERE ISN'T REALLY A MALE INVOLVED!

 

Its elementary!

 

I have taken it upon myself to report these...charlatans to the various webmasters to deal with them!

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Guest BamaRide

I think you're right on target with that observeration! :)

 

Why don't you set up a FMF meet with one and when the guy shows up ask him 'Who invited you?' LOL

 

BamaRide

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I agree with you Chicup. If you are a couple, then represent yourselves as a couple. There should be pictures of both in the profile. Even if the couple has to take pictures of each other because they don't want others to know they are in the life-style. Still there has to be times when the couple can get someone else to take a pic of them together. No one has to know what the pic is going to be used for. We have met many couples that have pics of only the female half on thier profile. Sometimes we see why that is. LOL:lol: Some couples are both attractive, but because there are only pics of the female half, we will not get into contact with them because we seek out couples that we are both attracted to.

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Guest BamaRide

We always stuck to face pics and both of us were always in the profile... course now that she's out of it...

 

BamaRide

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Naw....it's that they're all anchors.. ;)

 

I meant to add...that I know I'm the anchor of the couple. I married way out of my league simply because I'm a silver tongued devil...something that just doesn't show in a profile pic if you know what I mean...

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Guest BamaRide
I meant to add...that I know I'm the anchor of the couple. I married way out of my league simply because I'm a silver tongued devil...something that just doesn't show in a profile pic if you know what I mean...

 

Then stick out your tongue and take a pic!

That may attract the ladies!

 

(going to hide now)

BamaRide

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This is a pet peeve for us also. As bunny is the pickier of the two of us, not having pics of the guys is a problem. Me I just want them breathing.:D

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So your saying just because I'm not in our public profile picture and yet... you haven't contacted us and we agree to open our pics where you would clearly see me, solo and with Mrs fun at my side....

 

We're not a swinging couple ?

 

Report us to the website owners then.... Go ahead..... make my day :hahaha:

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. . . There seem to be 100's of women, who proudly show their bodies in various poses, but nary a man to be seen.

 

At first I thought this must be an oversite, but I think I figured it out. These are all single females pretending to be couples in order to contact swinging couples! . . .

You're going to get a lot of exercise if you are leaping to conclusion like this. It is true, none the less, that a very large proportion of on-line profiles contain pictures of only one of the two who supposedly comprise a couple. This definitely influences any decision we might make about sending an invitation or making a reply-in-the-affirmative. But it has not ever prompted us to make a report to a Webmaster.

 

~Michael

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I think perhaps this link will help out.

 

You apparently forgot to put the ":rollseye:" emoticon into your original posting.

 

Chicup I got what you were up to.

 

SW_PA, I have found that even with big grins and other smileys some people are just too literal. But hey if we were all alike the world would be boring.

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I knew also....

 

I have to ask, as I know you are very observant.

 

Do you see a difference in the amount of profiles (after a couple years) that do have pictures of the men now ?

 

I think the numbers are higher by about 20%.

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Do you see a difference in the amount of profiles (after a couple years) that do have pictures of the men now ?

 

I think the numbers are higher by about 20%.

 

 

In our area I'd have to say absolutely no.

 

Things seem to have changed on for our area on one site compared to a few years ago. I see almost NO shots of the men, something we haven't had a problem with in the past very often, and the type of people on seems to have changed.

 

Without getting into site names, back when we were looking we used 3 sites.

 

Site A seemed very, not sure how to politely say 'low quality'.

Site B seemed very 'normal' middle america swingers mix.

Site C seemed very 'lifestyle' party types.

 

Now of course there is overlap, not everyone on A was 'bad' nor was everyone on C a party type, but that was the general trend.

 

We are looking again and haven't been on site A but site B now seems more like site A. Its either the same couples that were on 4 years ago (most using the same pictures) or the kind that thinks its sexy to take a picture with a cigarette and food stains on their shirt.

 

Site C seems about the same as in the past.

 

As sites vary a lot in the types of couples on them based on area, I don't want to bother with the names since this would only apply to our town. I do think its interesting and I have to wonder if its psychological. Lets take a site with a complete mix in the swinging population, by random chance more of one 'type' of couple in an area joins. New people who are attracted to that type join, those that are not look elsewhere. Over a period of time, a majority of couples are now of that type.

 

I suppose thats why some sites (not A,B,or C) we were on had what were obvious 'fake' couples to create a false impression of diversity.

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interesting point of view. what area? not las vegas. cuz there are lots of couples here. the red rooster, the green door, the power exchange. my queen and i are very much into couples (seems to bring less drama than single woman).

 

niko_n_isa

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I don't know if this problem is getting better or worse. But I have noticed something unexpected, at least to me: many of the MIA men are not anchors. Many of them are quite hot. So... you might consider taking a calculated risk here and there. A few of our really good encounters began when I wrote just to say, "Hey, what does your guy look like?" We shouldn't have to do that, but life sometimes doesn't conform...

 

Today, I finally added a highlighted plea in our Swing Lifestyle profile about having pictures of both halves in the PUBLIC profile. This is because we got the zillionth email from a couple with NO picture of the guy, asking if we are interested. One of those couples, in fact, was only looking for someone for the guy to play with!:confused: Am I interested? How in the world would I know?

 

It just makes me believe that more firmly that people don't really understand that there is another person at the other end of their Send button, not just a pile of flesh. I have heard all the excuses and they just aggravate me.

 

{breathe... put down the coffee...}

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I don't know if this problem is getting better or worse. But I have noticed something unexpected, at least to me: many of the MIA men are not anchors. Many of them are quite hot. So... you might consider taking a calculated risk here and there. A few of our really good encounters began when I wrote just to say, "Hey, what does your guy look like?"

 

This is a good point. We found ourselves at the other side of this issue just recently. We had just been introduced to a new site and decided to join. All we had done was put in our basic information, but hadnt had the time to put up a picture or write out a profile. Well something there attracted enough interest that a couple sent us an email. I recognized them from our other site and assumed since we used essentially the same profile name that they had recognized us the same way and decided to show interest. It turns out that they hadnt recognized us from the other profile. They had just approached us from the basic info not having any idea of what we looked like.To make a long story short we did meet and will be setting up a playdate.

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I don't know if this problem is getting better or worse. But I have noticed something unexpected, at least to me: many of the MIA men are not anchors. Many of them are quite hot. So... you might consider taking a calculated risk here and there. A few of our really good encounters began when I wrote just to say, "Hey, what does your guy look like?" We shouldn't have to do that, but life sometimes doesn't conform...

 

You know, we have seen this too.

 

Its like they are pimping their wives out, but can't even put a body shot up? I can fully understand not having a face shot open to the public, but no excuse for no body shots.

 

Then as you said they are NOT always anchors, I just don't get that mentality.

 

Also we have seen the 'looking only for a female for a 3some' type adds where they only have a picture of the wife up as well. Umm hello?

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Uh HELLO,

 

My personal favorites are those who state that the husband cant have any pics on because of his job, position in society, etc ad nauseum. Then you see a profile full of pics of the wife that show not only her face but all the rest of her in all sorts of interesting poses.

 

I dont know, maybe its best they do it that way. I see way too much drama coming into their lives I want no part of.

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I'm one who really does not like to start a thread with a couple before seeing pictures. It's just so awkward when you have to stop the contact and say um...nevermind. So we are probably missing out some. We've have met a number of compatible couples via friends and house parties that makes the need for online contacts a little less, but I too see many profiles that are interesting, but no guy pics.

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We too saw the sarcasm and are in full agreement. Drives me absolutely crazy that it's all women pics.

 

When we are contacted by someone with a profile like that, our first response is usually "We require pictures of both before we can talk further". Only a few have come back and said they don't have any - most have opened their private pics at that point. Although I don't understand why they have to be in private only - remove the head if you're worried about recognition! I shouldn't have to ask!

 

Then there are those that want to email pics outside of the websites. To which we also decline - we do not email pictures and don't want them emailed to us.

 

So yeah, it's frustrating! Probably one of the main reasons we now just go straight to the club and don't spend as much time online trying to setup a meet.

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We too saw the sarcasm and are in full agreement. Drives me absolutely crazy that it's all women pics.

 

When we are contacted by someone with a profile like that, our first response is usually "We require pictures of both before we can talk further". Only a few have come back and said they don't have any - most have opened their private pics at that point. Although I don't understand why they have to be in private only - remove the head if you're worried about recognition! I shouldn't have to ask!

 

Then there are those that want to email pics outside of the websites. To which we also decline - we do not email pictures and don't want them emailed to us.

 

So yeah, it's frustrating! Probably one of the main reasons we now just go straight to the club and don't spend as much time online trying to setup a meet.

 

Many of you have probably already seen this, but it applies well here.

 

Def. Sarchasm: The giant gulf (chasm) between what is said and the person who doesn't get it.

 

I agree, we shouldn't have to ask. We will email pictures outside of the websites, as we try to accommodate. We just fold that request into our evaluation of how smart the couple is (or not).

 

For the third time in a week, we've gotten emails from people on SLS who don't have pictures of the guy at all, but are looking for a woman to play with just him. That one's less about how smart they are and more about how stupid they think we are.

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Then there are those that want to email pics outside of the websites. To which we also decline - we do not email pictures and don't want them emailed to us.

 

:confused:

 

Why not?

 

I don't trust swinger websites 100%. Back when we were online LL had a major security type breach where a great many couples discovered a printed copy of their profile mailed to their HOME address, and some of those couples never attended any event where their address would be known.

 

Your pictures are only as private as your webmaster.

 

A gmail, yahoo, etc account is free, can be 100% anonymous, and unless a major company decided to go rogue, 100% safe.

 

We are redoing our profile in a month or two once we get back from vacation and it will NOT have any face shots of either of us. Call me paranoid but I was semi-outted once already and I'm still uncomfortable from that episode.

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:confused:

 

Why not?

Our e-mail address: a path for spam. Swing Lifestyle address: Upon the only two occasions spam was received, the messages were reported to the site administrator; the addresses from which the spam originated disappeared.

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Our e-mail address: a path for spam. Swing Lifestyle address: Upon the only two occasions spam was received, the messages were reported to the site administrator; the addresses from which the spam originated disappeared.

 

I still don't get it.

 

I've recently set up a new swinger email under a false name. I've received exactly zero spam. Most spam comes from getting your email on various lists either by having them scanned by bots on websites,( this is why you see people list their email as myemail@nospam.yahoo.com, they expect you to remove the nospam part but a bot won't) or being sold by other websites you registered on. If you only use that email for photos, then they can only do random email address guessing to find you. I've never had that happen, I only get spam on 'used' addresses where I sign up for something.

 

The WORST thing that happens is you get on a list, and 95% will be filtered by the spam filter on the email site, and you gotta ignore a few emails a week.

 

By definition a website run by a single person, who is under no legal obligation to keep your photos private is less secure than a major free email hosting site from a fortune 500 company. As I've mentioned I've seen what happens when a web sites security breaks down with a few dozen very freaked out swingers.

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I guess we're in the minority here. I prefer to only see pics of the woman, even if I'm not bi enough to want to play with her . . . because I LOVE surprises! (Think Forrest Gump/box of chocolates). :lol:

 

Here's an idea. Go ahead and contact a couple if you like the lady and the profile. Set up a meet and show up alone. When the surprised hubby/SO wonders where your wife is, you can tell him you didn't know he really existed. :EG:

 

I really haven't noticed this trend too much. Seems when we get emails, they either have pics of both, or no face pics of either. The latter makes me nuts, and I'm usually tempted to use the auto reply . . .

 

=)

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:confused:

 

Why not?

 

I don't trust swinger websites 100%. Back when we were online LL had a major security type breach where a great many couples discovered a printed copy of their profile mailed to their HOME address, and some of those couples never attended any event where their address would be known.

 

Your pictures are only as private as your webmaster.

 

A gmail, yahoo, etc account is free, can be 100% anonymous, and unless a major company decided to go rogue, 100% safe.

 

We are redoing our profile in a month or two once we get back from vacation and it will NOT have any face shots of either of us. Call me paranoid but I was semi-outted once already and I'm still uncomfortable from that episode.

 

I wouldn't say we trust swinger websites 100% either. However, opening private pics to a specific profile, that we control, is one thing. Yeah there are still ways to print screen and copy, etc.....

 

Emailing to someone, where it can be forwarded, copied, whatever..... We're just not comfortable with that. YMMV. And I also don't think any gmail, yahoo, etc. account is 100% anonymous. IP addresses can always be traced.

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I wouldn't say we trust swinger websites 100% either. However, opening private pics to a specific profile, that we control, is one thing. Yeah there are still ways to print screen and copy, etc.....

 

Emailing to someone, where it can be forwarded, copied, whatever..... We're just not comfortable with that. YMMV. And I also don't think any gmail, yahoo, etc. account is 100% anonymous. IP addresses can always be traced.

 

I suppose I just trust a company with a few million email addresses and no knowledge of what its being used for over a website owned by some guy, swinger or not.

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Chicup,

 

It would appear that you're right...Even Mrs. Ekies is a single woman looking to hook-up with couples...

 

I hadn't really considered OUR profile while I was bitching about profiles with absolutely no pic of him to give us an idea of who we are contacting or who we are being contacted by.

 

I'm gonna fix that...thanks for the humorous look at my mistake.

 

Trace

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