Why don't they reply?

Here is my problem: We are on Swing Lifestyle, I take the time to make sure our profile is up to date, I read other peoples profiles, not just look at the pics. I email a cpl/person on there that we might be interested in them. When looking thru my sent mail file it shows that my email has been read, but UnReplied. It doesnt bother me that the other person/cpl is not interested, they have their reasons, which I really dont want to know. But they could atleast zip off a "No thanks", it only takes two seconds to hit the already typed in auto response of "No thanks, we are not compatible". It just kinda burns that we are not even worthy of a two second "No". does this bother any one else?

[curious49251]

Unfortunately, we have done this. Not because we are not interested, but simply for the fact that one of us reads the profile, then waits for the other to check it out. In some cases, we have not gotten back with some who have written us. We try to make it right by replying (sometimes a month later), but sometimes they seem to fall through the cracks.

On the same note, there is a couple we have written to (about 6 months apart) that reads our email but wont reply. We just moved on, obviously something about us doesn't appeal to them.

Our advice, don't sweat it. It's similar to when you are driving down the road and someone cuts you off. You may want to get on their tail and think horrible thoughts connecting them to a ditch. You have to remember that the person who did that to you will be long gone and out of your life in a matter of seconds, it's not worth risking your life for.

Hmmm 'Email Rage'?

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by curious49251

Unfortunately, we have done this. Not because we are not interested, but simply for the fact that one of us reads the profile, then waits for the other to check it out. In some cases, we have not gotten back with some who have written us. We try to make it right by replying (sometimes a month later), but sometimes they seem to fall through the cracks.

I'm embarrassed to admit, we're often guilty of the same thing.

We don't go through our online adds all that much, but if one of us is looking at them without the other, we usually won't reply at all until the other half of us had a chance to look it over.

I know we've missed a few 'Thanks, but no thanks' messages we should've sent by reading adds this way.

Don't take it personally, smileytattoo.

[ALilOEverything]

I wouldn't take it personally. I found it really disappointing in the beginning myself though. I'm more bothered when a couple writes first, we write back and then we never hear from them again. That's happened more than once. I just now don't get my heart set on hearing back from anyone. I have been guilty of it too though. In the past if they didn't bother by giving a proper sentence when they first write I don't give them the time to write back. Although after reading someone's post recently where the person who contacted them only said "Interested?" in their email and it ended up being a great couple I think we could have passed up some nice couples. I'm bad, now someone slap my hands

It's not something I dwell on, its a short term frustration. I am the one that usually keeps up with our personals, not hubby. I guess I know what we together are looking for. So when I reply, it is most often with out hubby even seeing it. So far I have not been wrong yet. And I can understand that people are busy, and dont always have much time. the one thing that I find funny out of it all is when I have emailed a cpl and they send a no thanks, then three months later we get an email from them like they just saw our profile and would we be interested in them! That cracks me up!

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by smileytattoo

the one thing that I find funny out of it all is when I have emailed a cpl and they send a no thanks, then three months later we get an email from them like they just saw our profile and would we be interested in them! That cracks me up!

Again, this is most likely a result of the couple viewing profiles separately and not communicating too well with eachother about which couples they've declined and which couples they've contacted.

[curious49251]

Originally Posted by ALilOEverything

I wouldn't take it personally. I found it really disappointing in the beginning myself though. I'm more bothered when a couple writes first, we write back and then we never hear from them again. That's happened more than once. I just now don't get my heart set on hearing back from anyone. I have been guilty of it too though. In the past if they didn't bother by giving a proper sentence when they first write I don't give them the time to write back. Although after reading someone's post recently where the person who contacted them only said "Interested?" in their email and it ended up being a great couple I think we could have passed up some nice couples. I'm bad, now someone slap my hands

Quoting our favorite email:

"YOU TO SOUND GOOD WE ARE A MARRIED COUPLE AND WE WANT TO MEET OTHER MARRIED COUPLES ARE YOU INTERESTED LET US NOW"

We are far from snobbish when it comes to how others communicate with us, we aren't perfect. However, we draw the line on those who can't write anything without the Caps Lock on and don't know what a comma or period is. We could meet these people at a party and not give a crap about how they happen to write, but we just can't start a conversation on the internet with those who don't know the basics. It is far too frustrating. We may have missed a couple of great people too. It's just one of our things...

[good times]

We are often accused of being guilty of this too. For the same reason as Ves and Curious49251 it often takes a week or two before we get a chance to review the profile of the interested couple together. So it isn't uncommon for us to not respond in a timely manner or not at all. I hate to admit it, but if I read the message and found the couple interesting I usually remember to bring it up sooner than if the message I get isn't very inspiring. So usually the ones that take the longest to answer are the "no thanks" responses.

That reminds me, I got a message the other day that I haven't brought to Mrs. GT's attention yet. Bad GT

[Nymph an' Satyr]

What I do is instead of opening the mail on Swing Lifestyle- I go to the sender's profile and view the mail history. You can then read the message with out it registering as having been read.

This alows me to share the profile with my spouse when we have time together, ponder a response, or simply gives me time to write back at my convenience. Meanwhile, the person who sent the message doesn't feel completely ignored- becasue as far as they know, the message hasn't been read yet.

This is at least better than the message showing as having been read- and it takes a week for us to respond back. There is also the added benefit of the message not being deleted until it's been responded to in some shape, way. or form

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by Nymph an' Satyr

What I do is instead of opening the mail on Swing Lifestyle- I go to the sender's profile and view the mail history. You can then read the message with out it registering as having been read.

It's cool to know we aren't the only ones who use that trick!

[Spoomonkey]

For us, we get very busy. It stinks - and most of the time we will answer all of our PMs. But, occassionally, we have things happen. This week, for instance, we had a computer crisis - and with us sharing a computer, we just didn't have much time for correspondence.

We've had it happen to us and - always trying to be positive - we figure that there must be some pretty good reasons.

Spoomonkey

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by Nymph an' Satyr

What I do is instead of opening the mail on Swing Lifestyle- I go to the sender's profile and view the mail history. You can then read the message with out it registering as having been read.

You rock! Thanks for sharing this trick!

Mrs Naughty & I were just talking today how it is funny that some single men will contact us first, We will message them back saying we could be interested. How often do you get to our area etc....
And we never hear back from them.
Our biggest peeve though are those who ask us to open our private pics in the first message and they STILL have theirs blocked.

We message them back telling them how rude it is to ask to see someone elses pics when they haven't even opened their own. Then we usualy block them.

We had to do that tonight as a matter of fact.