Are we hung up on the visual??

[curiousagain]

I have a question for everybody but especially the single males.

I have met several couples in the lifestyle. Most through internet ads. I have noticed something. The three couples I have met that had NO PICTURES AT ALL on their ad, oddly enough had strikingly beautiful women, with good looking husbands. And, each were great people, intelligent, witty, classy. Now, there are some ads out there with photos of beautiful women. But, it would seem odd that these ads had absolutely no pics of these women on them. I have heard it explained that they didn't want to meet people who were only interested in their looks, but it seems to be more than that to me.

My question is, do you pass by ads that don't have pictures? Do you do searches only for ads with pics?? (I have done this in the past but hopefully have managed to learn something in the last year or so). Has anyone else encountered this?? Are we guilty of being TOO visual when searching for play partners??? Are we passing up missed opportunities??

[Spoomonkey]

We don't put our pictures on our ads...

I am not sure if we are the type of couple that you've met (though, I would say that Mrs Spoo is a strikingly beautiful woman) - but one of the reasons we do that is because we just don't want to have to deal with people who aren't looking for personality.

It slows the traffic down - but we figure lots of people who over look our profile are folks who wouldn't "get us" anyway...

Spoomonkey

[TNT]

We are probably in the middle of this one...we will look at ads with no pics and if they are well written and show a sense of humor we will contact them.

However, we do like to see pictures of people but, the ones that have nice pictures and no profile whatsoever to speak of we would not contact. We like to know there is a mind as well as a body.

Teresa

[good times]

We don't have pictures in our ad for various reasons and we rarely contact people through the ads except to reply when they contact us first. I'm not positive, but that could be why we don't have much luck with ads.

But we haven't not met anybody because they didn't have pictures either, so I guess it isn't that important to us as long as they sound compatible from their ad.

And for the record, Mrs. GT is HOT! (my unbiased opinion, of course)

When we had ADs up we would only respond to those who had pics, even if they were private, or offered to e-mail us a pic in their first message to us.

We figured,
We are showing you who we are. If you ain't willing to do the same....Move on.

[Kari&theWuff]

We have private pictures on our ad that we send out only if we are interested in whoever contacted us. I'm sure that's a factor in why our email is so slow but we both would rather have quality over quantity. I totally agree with Spoomonkey, personality is the main attractor. We're both quirky and we're looking for the same!

Kari

[dutch51]

Originally Posted by TNT

We are probably in the middle of this one...we will look at ads with no pics and if they are well written and show a sense of humor we will contact them.

However, we do like to see pictures of people but, the ones that have nice pictures and no profile whatsoever to speak of we would not contact. We like to know there is a mind as well as a body.
Teresa

Ditto to what TNT wrote. We look at ads with and without pics, and while a picture may get our attention first, it's a whole-package deal for us. If the profile sounds fantastic, we contact them and ask if they have pictures. We used to not have pics on our ad when we started out, but tried to write a profile that really stated who we were, and were more than willing to send pics to any couple who requested them (or turn on the webcam at times, too).

We realize that some people have specific reasons for not posting pics and we try to respect that. It helps a lot if they say they have pics and will send them on request. No, looks are not the most important thing, but there has to be some attraction that fuels the desire for things to get physical, right?

Maybe we have missed opportunities in the past, but we figure if a couple puts some of their own unique personality into their profile, even without pics, then contacting them is worth a try.

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by Mr&Mrs-naughty

When we had ADs up we would only respond to those who had pics, even if they were private, or offered to e-mail us a pic in their first message to us. We figured, we are showing you who we are. If you ain't willing to do the same....Move on.

We feel the same way. The photos in our ads indicate how open and comfortable we are with our lifestyle, and we want to meet couples who fit that same profile.

[confunktion]

Originally Posted by TNT

We are probably in the middle of this one...we will look at ads with no pics and if they are well written and show a sense of humor we will contact them.

However, we do like to see pictures of people but, the ones that have nice pictures and no profile whatsoever to speak of we would not contact. We like to know there is a mind as well as a body.

Teresa

A big Dito to Teresa's post. The only thing I would add is that the Mrs. and I prefer that a no-pic ad states that pics are available upon request. We respect those who don't feel that they can post pics for all to see, but they have to be able to show a little something upon further request.

To me, the ads with lacking or poorly-written text are worse than those without pics.

Mr. Funk
Just one man's opinion.

[LikeMinds321]

I read them all, pics or no pics.

If the profile is poorly written, with or without pictures, I have no interest in pursuing the couple. I've seen many tantalizing couple's pictures, but do not contact them because of what they say; more often, though, it is because of what they don't say--their profiles are too brief. I'm not interested in pulling all the answers I want out of people through many e-mails. That's time consuming and I end up feeling like I'm interviewing them, when really, these people should have put the basics in their profile.

I don't doubt we are missing out on some great folks, not because they don't include pictures, but because they have indistinct profiles.

We have pictures on our sites, some private face pictures, and I like the option to choose who I will share these pictures with. But we also state in our profile that people need to send us a picture before we will consider meeting.

Originally Posted by curiousagain

I have heard it explained that they didn't want to meet people who were only interested in their looks, but it seems to be more than that to me.

Could you explain your thoughts in this statement. I'm not clear about what you are suggesting, but I'm interested in knowing more.

LM

[curiousagain]

There could be a lot of reasons besides just avoiding people who don't care what your profile says or who you are.

I know before I had a pic on my ad I received some responses and all had read my profile. Now that I have a pic up, the response is biblically larger in volume but so many have not even read my profile. So I think some do it just so you will pay attention to their profile and hopefully not contact them if you don't fit what they are looking for.

I am sure there are other reasons some may have and was just, please excuse the pun, CURIOUS as to what they might be.

[JustAskJulie]

Personally, I don't think an ad has to have a face pic, but I don't typically reply to an ad that doesn't at least have some sort of pic attached to it - and it can't be a genital pic. I think there is that fear in all of us, that you want to have something to go on.

hubby and I look at both with and without pic ads. We look at how they are written. I will admit that I dont take the first step with ads that have pics of women in the cpl that weigh less than a certain amount. I think that we would be rejected, so I dont even try. I know that is not right or fair to cpls that have skinny women in them. I cant help it. I am more comfortable with women closer to my size anyway. We have tons of pics on our ads, we want you to know exactly what you are getting if your interested.