Worried she will enjoy sex with me less if she has sex with a guy who is larger

[markholly]

Hi. We are new to the board and to the lifestyle. I have a question I hope to get an honest answer to. background: I started dating my wife when she was just out of high school. We've been married for 15 years now and the last couple our sex life has seemed a little stale. We have discussed the possibily of swinging. She has almost no experience other than with me. She wants to try a MFM and has said that she would like to try it with a guy who has a very large penis. Mine is fairly small. To be honest I was more enthusiastic about this whole idea before she started talking about penis sizes. I'm worried that she may find sex with me less interesting if she has sex with a guy who is very well endowed. I'd appreciate an honest answer. Am I making a mistake? Thanks in advance for your response. markholly.

[dave110256]

Tough question...........but I don't think your wife will find out that the size of the penis has anything to do with the ability to please her sexually. I think most women wonder how a larger penis would feel, I know I'd love to see my wife make the best of a big one.......

[FLRooster]

Yeah, I think it is a common fantasy....and not always as good as they think it will be.....sometimes big CAN be too big

[Tom & Bonnie]

With tongue firmly embeded inhis cheek, Tom sez...

"I wouldn't worry about it too much. Penises are only as good as their operators. And, if she would want to leave you for another, larger penis, it would seem that there are more problems in your relationship than just dick size!"

seriously, swinging is all about experimentation. So, experiment and enjoy yourselves!

[Alura]

Welcome from Oklahoma, Mark & Holly! We're glad y'all have joined us and wish you two the best in your search.

I've been lucky to see my wife "make the best of a big one." It was one of the most erotic sights I've ever seen.

We've played with two couples who were married young. In the case of one couple, we were the first experience, other than their spouse, for both of them. We played with them for several years. Fun couple! Very creative!

Your's is not an unusual situation. I wouldn't worry about the "big ones." They're not all that easy to find.

One of our rules is that we always sleep together. After a night of play with another couple, we invariably have energy left to make love with each other. It's always better than the play, including the Big Dicked guy.

Mr. Alura

[FLRooster]

Another common thing I hear is that thickness is often more important than length in terms of sensation......

[LikeMinds321]

Hi markholly -

Welcome to the Swingers Board!

It isn't unusual to feel threatened by the thought of your wife wanting to exprience a bigger penis inside her. Talk with her about her fantasy. Try to share her pleasure while she discusses her fantasy with you. Talking openly about sex, and exploring more sexual activities together, is where to begin before you bring others into your bedroom.

Read this board and you'll find many posts about the topics of jealousy and insecurity when swinging, and how to deal with it. If you and your wife are committed to each other and have a solid marriage it will remain solid if you decide to swing. Approach swinging slowly and learn about it here, before you begin.

Glad you have joined the board!

LM

[good times]

Welcome to the board markholly, Dito what everybody else has said and keep in mind their is no way someone with a little bigger tool can make up for your 15 years of acumulated experiance of what your wife likes. My wife and I have now experianced many different shapes and sizes and no one has been able to match much less exceed the sexual pleasure we have with each other.

[SexhoundDog]

Originally Posted by Tom & Bonnie

[i] And, if she would want to leave you for another, larger penis, it would seem that there are more problems in your relationship than just dick size!"

I can't really add a helluva lot to that comment!

I personally would hope that if my wife wants to do MFM, she'd be lucky enough to find a guy with a big 'un who knew how to use it. I WANT her to be pleasured, enjoying the eye candy and new sensation. And although I can imagine your wife wanting a big one, look for a quality guy and hope that he also the big one she wants!

[SexhoundDog]

testing the italicized[/i] thing

[northindycpl]

Markholly,

Would you leave your wife for a woman with bigger breasts? I doubt it, so why would you worry that she will leave you for a man with a bigger penis?

Seriously, unless your erect penis looks like a wart on your butt, it probably isn't actually a small one - seems like I recently read that most men think the average size is 10 inches, while most women think the average size is around 4 inches!

Best advice: talk to her about it.

Mr. NorthIndyCpl

[soflafun]

It’s not the actual physical penetration or the size, shape or whatever. It’s a fantasy that she has. Would you trade her for a girl with a tighter pussy? NO! but being there in that situation sharing such exiting delight with your wife participating would be the biggest turn-on not the physical characteristics of your boy/girl toy.
relax and enjoy
S&M

[HotMoCpl]

Let's look at it from another angle. Many women worry that they're husbund will find a tighter vagina then themselves. My first wife was much tighter then my current wife, but this wife is so much more fun. Besides, she's gotten better at controlling her vaginal muscles.

Then there is the other side. As an U.S. Army Recruiter we had a saying, "You can't have what you never had". In your case, let's hope not.

[intuition897]

Welcome to the board markholly.

Don't sweat it. It's the same as a woman worrying that her husband will leave her once he's had a taste of a perkier, firmer... younger... piece of ass. After it's happened, you realize that it's nowhere near as horrible as you've built it up in your mind to be. She's not just a piece of ass, but a real live person who, if you've been adequately picky, is respectful of your relationship with your husband. Ok, so maybe she's got an absolutely perfect body - and maybe he's got a really huge cock - but you realize that your husband (or in your case, your wife) is harboring no feelings of longing other than to get you home and screw your brains out because he's just so excited over the whole experience. It's just fantasy. If she realizes that she really enjoyed the experience and wants to try it again, why not? Or you can surprise her with a monster sized dildo for her birthday or something; Mr. intuition did that. It only comes out to play very infrequently however as "sometimes big CAN be too big " holds true. We haven't tried a MFM yet, but it's in the works. I know he'd love to watch me "try to make the best of a big one." lol
The bottom line is that I have NO complaints whatsoever about Mr. intuition's 'package' and about his ability to satisfy me. I agree with Mr. intuition's feelings about other people being more attractive than our own spouses: in order to hold our sexual attention, the other person NEEDS to be very attractive. We don't share love or deep intimacy with them, so they need to have something else that catches the eye and gets the pulse racing. And part of the fun is in experiencing differences between our own partner and someone else. It only accentuates the value of what we have together. My advice? Relax and enjoy the fantasy that your wife's willing to share with you.

[Compersor]

Length is not so much what matters. My wife likes a fairly thick penis, that is not too long. Recently she was fucked by a guy who was just too big for her and it is an experience she doesn't wish to repeat. It left her sore after.
You should never feel inadequate about the size of your equipment and that of a visiting male. You and your wife have something (a solid marriage if you are ready to swing) that cannot possibly be threatened by a big dick, quite on the contrary, the excitement of the sharing, the complicity and the ensuing increased intimacy between the two of you will only bring you closer together.
I love it when my wife can enjoy a man who is more handsome, better hung and better built than me. It doesn't faze me in the slightest.