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sweetgirlknows

Always CLOSE Your E-mail

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Hey everyone,

Interesting situation the other night. My best girlfriend whom I've known for 20 years came over last night for dinner. I had received an e-mail update from one of our profiles on my iPhone and forgot to close the e-mail. When my friend went to look up a number in my phone to order pizza she saw the swingers site e-mail!!!! I was mortified until she said her and her husband experimented about 5 years ago but stopped because they didn't like the people they were meeting. I was shocked!!!!!!!!!!! She is totally not the type (at least I thought). We talked about it and she said she thought her husband would be open to the idea with us. In fact she said her husband commented numerous times about me. I told her I would talk it over with Mr. Sweet and get back to her. She said no pressure and after friends for 20 years we are friends for life. What do you guys think? Would you go for it?

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I never mix vanilla friendships with swinging. I think it's good you can talk about it openly but I would avoid partnering with them.

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Well, if you had closed your email, you wouldn't have a fresh subject available for dialogue, would you? ;)

 

Here's a thought on swinging with your friends: Are you willing to chance the possibility of ending a 20 year friendship? We don't know the dynamics of your relationship with your friend, but swinging can make things weird very quickly. Playing with them might end up being great, but understand that it could be a disaster also.

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That happened to hubby with his college roommate. Except it was SLS that was left open (on his laptop) and roomie saw a big ol' cock picture and got the story. He propositioned us and we said no (mostly because I couldn't stand his girlfriend).

 

I agree, though, in general. Don't mix vanilla friends and swinging unless you're willing to risk the friendship. There is ALWAYS the possibility of something awkward happening, things not going as expected, or lines being crossed and I would generally say that a long-term, close friendship like it seems you have isn't worth the risk just for sex.

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I agree with Hippiegirlie I wouldn't do it, your current friendship will suffer if things don't work out, it's not worth the chance. Good Friendships are priceless.

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Mixing it up with people whom you've know for that many years is hazardous. What do you do when you discover the guy cannot kiss without covering you in slobber or the woman private parts smell like a tuna boat? One of the benefits we see about the people we meet in this so-called lifestyle is that we can take them or leave them. We would feel very bad about having to leave a long-established friendship.

 

And yes, I agree. Don't forget to log off your e-mail account. On my phone, I even have it set to not automatically fill in Web addresses. My Facebook is password protected.

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Thanks for helping on that one guys! I was leaning towards not doing it but wanted to see your reactions which confirm both of ours. We think they're attractive but no lol!

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Thanks for helping on that one guys! I was leaning towards not doing it but wanted to see your reactions which confirm both of ours. We think they're attractive but no lol!

 

Even if someone is very attractive, you don't know how they'll be in bed. I wouldn't do it. It sounds like the friendship is too much to risk.

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I know it's standard practice to not turn friends into swing partners, or in general to have sex with your friends. However, I'm actually much pickier about my friends than about casual partners, so there are some circumstances in which I'd give it a go. There would need to be a pre-existing attraction, plus a certain level of trust and confidence in the strength of the friendship, though, because friends are way too tough to replace.

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Yeah, I think it would be awkward. I told her earlier that I didn't want to chance our friendship and she understood. I told her I would share experiences with her though. It is nice having someone to talk to about swinging tho.

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I'd love to find out that one of our close 'couple' friends had also been in the lifestyle. In fact, one of my best friends and his wife were and it's so nice, like sweetgirlknows just said, to have someone to discuss that with. But we do have one couple that we've known a long time and done a lot of things with that going from just vanilla to swinging would work. But then, we're all in our 60's and retired so the drama that comes with kids, jobs, and other stuff from being younger wouldn't be there. So, I agree with MauiJaneDoe on that note.

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The problem with standard advice is that it is "standard" for all circumstances and this one is slightly different than the usual swinging with friends.

 

Normally when that happens, its either the swinger couple "seducing" the friends, or the friends finding out and then deciding to give it a go. Basically a true newbie couple with all the drama potential which is so common to first times.

 

In this case though its not as if this is really a seduction or a "oh honey lets try it, what can go wrong". The other couple are swingers (or at least were attempting to be), they must have already discussed it at length, they just were not happy with the types of couples they were finding, which I can fully relate to.

 

So while there ARE dangers here for the friendship, they are not the same as the usual ones. I'd personally advise proceeding with caution. Making sure everyone is on the same page, discussing how you are worried about friendships changing, and starting SLOWLY just to gauge them. Don't just go into a full swap night. Start soft and work your way up. This is not my usual advice for swinging in general but being they are already friends, its not like starting soft will discourage them to look elsewhere.

 

If at some point things seem off or weird, you can fall back to saying how it just seems so weird with them being how well they know each other, blame yourselves (and who know it might be true) and stop before it goes all the way.

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The best experiences we had during our marriage was swapping with friends. One has to concentrate on great communication in order to ward off any problems or misgivings. Having sex with people one likes is much preferable to fucking strangers, in my opinion.

 

Alura

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We crossed the friendship line once too. It turned out to be a very good experience for us. We are just as close today as ever. We rarely play together, but it is cool that it is a possibility. It wasn't weird at all after the 10 minutes of shock wore off that they were into the same thing.

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Here's a thought on swinging with your friends: Are you willing to chance the possibility of ending a 20 year friendship? We don't know the dynamics of your relationship with your friend, but swinging can make things weird very quickly. Playing with them might end up being great, but understand that it could be a disaster also.

 

What he said.

 

I'd say talk it over with your hubby and think about it long and hard. Then talk about it more with the friends and see how things go. If nothing else, you have a couple you can talk openly with and perhaps they might decide to give swinging another chance (with or without you).

 

One question I'd worry about a bit is whether they really stopped because they didn't like the people they met or because swinging really wasn't for them? If it really wasn't for them, and they decide to try things again with you and things don't go well, you put two relationships at risk.

 

There's a LOT of talking to be done before you consider moving forward here.

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Hi Julie!!! I just saw your post and you asked a great question I didn't think twice about before. They stopped because both got busy with work (started their own business). I have been entertaining this idea again. My friend and I were discussing our experiences recently and after talking to her I am re-considering. After my few bi-experiences with another women I am wondering what it is like to be with her. I've seen her in her birthday suit and she's a very sensual curvy woman (my type lol).

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i had quite few experiences with friends. to me the actual sex was great !!! the bad arrived after... not the next day but slowly in a long term the friendship did suffer... at the end, was quite a disaster... it's why i'm turning now to people I don't know and will not do it with friends anymore. Hope you'll have more luck.

 

so did you do it or not at the end ? :)

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i had quite few experiences with friends. to me the actual sex was great !!! the bad arrived after... not the next day but slowly in a long term the friendship did suffer... at the end, was quite a disaster... it's why i'm turning now to people I don't know and will not do it with friends anymore. Hope you'll have more luck.

 

so did you do it or not at the end ? :)

 

We haven't done it yet but we are leaning towards doing it. I talked it over with Mr. Sweet and he suggested just her and play to start and see how things go. Her husband isn't bisexual and I really don't like putting on a show for a straight guy. Hubby and I either do full bi-swap or full straight. I like Mr. Sweet's suggestion and of coarse I'd tell him all about playtime. My friend understands our feelings towards this and she agrees. She said he husband is ok with her being with me alone. We are having a girls night out tomorrow so maybe it will happen. :-D

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We haven't done it yet but we are leaning towards doing it. I talked it over with Mr. Sweet and he suggested just her and play to start and see how things go. Her husband isn't bisexual and I really don't like putting on a show for a straight guy. Hubby and I either do full bi-swap or full straight. I like Mr. Sweet's suggestion and of coarse I'd tell him all about playtime. My friend understands our feelings towards this and she agrees. She said he husband is ok with her being with me alone. We are having a girls night out tomorrow so maybe it will happen. :-D

 

I think to do it step by step is a really good idea. If i was you i'll do even MMF and FFM before full swap with a couple. cause in a full swap you have everything there, the girl-girl + the MMF + the FFM and if you add the bi-MMFF it' even a huge step up to see your husband with another guy. step by step you can deal with each new things one at a time and enjoy more the physical part without too much stuff in your head.

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We haven't done it yet but we are leaning towards doing it. I talked it over with Mr. Sweet and he suggested just her and play to start and see how things go. Her husband isn't bisexual and I really don't like putting on a show for a straight guy. Hubby and I either do full bi-swap or full straight. I like Mr. Sweet's suggestion and of coarse I'd tell him all about playtime. My friend understands our feelings towards this and she agrees. She said he husband is ok with her being with me alone. We are having a girls night out tomorrow so maybe it will happen. :-D

 

Let us know how it goes.

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Hey everyone!! So my friend and I had a GREAT time last night!!!!!!!! She introduced me to a strap-on she bought for the occasion ;-). I have to say I felt a little awkward being fucked by a woman at first but she was soooooo good at helping me to relax that I can't believe I didn't do it sooner. I still prefer the real thing way more but the thought of being fucked by another woman is just so incensing!! I will also say seeing your best girlfriend naked and sensual for you is AMAZING. We made out for awhile before unwrapping and that just soothed my mind over so much. We figured the next step will be having sex with our respective spouses in front of each other. No full swap yet because we want to take it slow.

 

@victoria's_dreams: Good suggestions but we don't play alone with other couples. In fact I wouldn't even play alone with another woman except for my girlfriend because Mr. Sweet knows her well and we are all really close. I think it would be pointless to leave one party out when we are all such great friends.

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This is a great thread! I'm sure everyone here is just as interested in your progress as we are. I am personally envious of your good fortune to have such close friends who are like y'all. ~Captain

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This is a great thread! I'm sure everyone here is just as interested in your progress as we are. I am personally envious of your good fortune to have such close friends who are like y'all. ~Captain

 

Thanks CaptainAndNurse! Mr. Sweet and I were saying the same thing. I think people have a lot more secrets out there than you know but bringing them to light takes an act of fate. I NEVER would tell any of our friends what we do. This was purely an accident though I wasn't surprised she and her husband are into swinging. She is a VERY sexual person. Perhaps this is what drew us into being friends lol

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We've been in similar situations and something has always held us back from mixing our two lifestyles together...... maybe we're too scared/protective ?

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great story ! sounds like a great time you had. your friend is naughty (in a good way) ! lucky you :) very hot to imagine you guys. at the end of that thread, maybe we shall say :"Never CLOSE Your E-mail" :) but i believe it's a lot of luck that your friend who read it was into this. good for you and congrats for your event !

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great story ! sounds like a great time you had. your friend is naughty (in a good way) ! lucky you :) very hot to imagine you guys. at the end of that thread' date=' maybe we shall say :"Never CLOSE Your E-mail" :) but i believe it's a lot of luck that your friend who read it was into this. good for you and congrats for your event ![/quote']

 

I thought it was luck too at first but the more I think about it, maybe not. Mr. Sweet and I do choose friends that are very similar to us. We like open minded people and people that are free spirited. My friend is very artistic and sensual so she fits the bill. I think these traits are required for swinging. Rather than describe my friend as naughty I just like to think she is SEXY!

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Rather than describe my friend as naughty I just like to think she is SEXY!

 

i was only referring to the strap-on only for your first girl girl experience

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i was only referring to the strap-on only for your first girl girl experience

 

Oh it was my second girl girl experience. It was my first time with a strap-on though lol

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