Porn Industry seeks federal Bailout

[knb2004]

OK, not exactly swinger related, and I know was done with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but I think I have now seen it all:

CNN Political Ticker: All politics, all the time Blog Archive - Porn industry seeks federal bailout « - Blogs from CNN.com

[bbarnsworth]

Originally Posted by knb2004

OK, not exactly swinger related, and I know was done with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but I think I have now seen it all:

CNN Political Ticker: All politics, all the time Blog Archive - Porn industry seeks federal bailout « - Blogs from CNN.com

Ironically, when I loaded this thread the advert at the top was for the Playboy Store.

[socolais]

Yeah, they're goin tits-up

[Willing29]

I want to know how much money it will take to make better movies. If 5 Billion is not enough give them a portion of GM's bailout. Actually congress oughta think LONG and HARD about this!

[TravlParty]

I'd love to be a fly on the wall when they present that to congress!

Seriously though, porn is older than automobiles. It's historical primacy alone should get them a few billion.

[WesternSwing]

I love some of the comments on it. Again, Puritan America freaks-out at the near mention of anything except missionary sex between one man and one woman for procreation purposes only.

[MrkLin]

Originally Posted by socolais

Yeah, they're goin tits-up

Now that's funny right there ^^^ I don't care who y'are...

My only comment is; we wanted change, right...?

[pants_1]

Ok, I have managed to not panic about this whole economy thing for a long time now. The economy goes up, it goes down; the only thing you can really do is try to hold some money back when it goes up to help when it bottoms out.

But if porn dies, so goeth the world! Perhaps you've heard of the economic idiology usually termed Monetarism? The theory goes that the economy is ultimately driven by the supply of money in the system, and economic preturbations can be managed by either adding or removing money from the economy.

Well... what happens if you disrupt the porn supply? It is commonly held that porn lasts, that a 100 disk DVD collection will provide the same satisfaction in five years that it does now. Nothing could be further from the truth. A healthy American sex life requires a constant supply of newer, better porn.

Look at the crud we (those of us over 30) grew up with... pre-Viagra, half the guys didn't even have an erection! There was hardly any girl-on-girl action, and pretty much no anal, unless you got fetish stuff. Sure, there was more plot (if you can call it that), but it just wouldn't cut it these days.

What will we need in a couple more decades? Will porn be all MMMMMMMF five-somes with double-vaginal penetration + anal + oral + two hand-jobs + one guy doing a Boston Fern? Well, you won't find that now. That's the Porn of the Future! Our primitive, 2000s porn just won't get the juices flowing in the bodies of the next generation.

But if we let the industry die, there will be no Porn of the Future. Without the visual stimulation, how will vanillas get their voyeur fix? We'll HAVE to have a female president, because every male will be permanently crippled by chronic sperm retention. How will people find new and kinkier ways of putting parts of their bodies in things? Teenage boys will have to confine their furtive internet searches to celebrity nipple-slips and accidental upskirt shots! Frustration, inhibition, creative constipation, boredom, and expansion of mundane hobbies will stymie progress in every field of human endeavor! Constriction of the porn supply could be the tragedy that finally topples our civlization.

In the aftermath, in the world where our current system has so throughly collapsed that porn can no longer flow at all, people will be reduced to having sex merely for procreation. Can you imagine the horror? I think the living will envy the dead.

[two4youinswva]

No need to worry. The Japanese will take care of all your freaky porn needs.
Hell, they've being doing tentacle porn and erotica for over 170 years.

No one does fetishes like the Japanese do fetishes, so it's all good.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by two4youinswva

No need to worry. The Japanese will take care of all your freaky porn needs.
Hell, they've being doing tentacle porn and erotica for over 170 years.

No one does fetishes like the Japanese do fetishes, so it's all good.

True. Japan has long been the leader in creative porn. It's amazing how creative you get when you can't show an actual penis.

[WesternSwing]

Pants_1, that is funny stuff.