First Step

[MyWife&Me]

Originally Posted by bi4me2

(her) Is it just me or does something just not sit right here?

You start out with an "old flame" of hers (sounds like a coulda, woulda, shoulda) and his wife and now you're talking MFM. What happened to the wife?

This whole situation screams 'major fishy' to me. Not trying to play devils advocate but this does not sound like the best scenario for a good outcome.

I'm certain there's nothing fishy going on. We've been in this together from the start. The idea of a traditional swap involving both wives was abandoned a few years ago and my wife has been very up front all along about her jealousy issues.

I have excepted her limits and out of that was born the idea of the MFM threesome. The constant is just the same guy and I have been the one to push for him, not her, in fact I had to work at showing her why I felt he's the right one.

I have told her that for the first time I think someone she's comfortable with would yield the best outcome. That's why I've pushed for him since he is experienced and, she's familiar and comfortable with him.

Thanks bi4me2 (her) and everyone for your comments and advice.

[padoc]

You talked initially about swinging as a couple and that seemed to get both your motors running. Now she's claiming jealousy over sharing you with her old bf's wife. I think she may simply be selfish. What she may want is to complete unfinished business with the high school sweetie leaving your desire for some variety and spice just dangling in the breeze. I'd insist on the couples meeting first and when you do, seriously discuss a foursome. While in that discussion, observe and try to get handle on your wife's true motives. You may be in for an unpleasant surprise.

[MyWife&Me]

We met with him on Friday night for drinks and dinner. Everything went great. We spent a few hours catching up on my wife’s part and getting to know each other on my part. My wife was very at ease and as comfortable with him after 20 years of no face to face contact as she is with our regular friends. And we were both surprised how comfortable I was. Normally I am very quite and reserved around people I just met but not this time.

On the ride home I asked how she felt and she said that she felt comfortable but needed some time to think if he is the one and if she is ready. She texted with him during the ride home about what we thought and what he thought and it seemed like everyone was ready. Once we got home that night we had a great sex session with no mention of the threesome, which was a surprise to me but I just followed her lead.

Saturday was full of family activities for us so there was very little mention of the next step. After last night’s sleep we talked this morning and she told me that she is ready to proceed. So we texted him and worked out the scheduling and we are set to meet for the threesome on the last weekend of September. I wish it was sooner but our schedules just didn’t match up until then. After the texting ended I asked her if she was nervous now we have a date set and she claimed that no she wasn’t because she could still call it off at this point. But for now let the anticipation begin. I have been walking around with a semi-hard-on all day long and I can’t keep my hands off of her.

[bbarnsworth]

With the exception of the other wife, sounds good so far. Maybe I missed something on the other wife. Is she in the loop and up to date?

[MyWife&Me]

Sorry to take so long to get back to everyone. Well do to scheduling problems on both our part and his we never did meet with the wife's old boyfriend. But last Saturday night we did have our first MFM threesome and it was good. My wife had a good time and for me, getting to finally watch her with another guy was even better than I had fantasized about. I will be posting an account of that evening under the First Time Experiences section soon for those who are interested.

This is going to sound bad but since getting involved in searching for other potential partners my wife had realized she can do better than her ex and really has no interest in meeting him at all now. So as things have turned out we just weren't meant to meet up with him. I want to thank everyone for their advice throughout this thread.

[MN Tom]

Well, I have to say this "solution" sounds better than the plan.

Basically you both got what you were looking for, that being an MFM, and you didn't have to deal with the issues of stirring up an old relationship.

And you had plenty of discussion along the way, hopefully dealing somewhat with the jealousy she has in terms of you being with someone else.