Checklist for what you can do/can't do?

Is this a good idea? Me and my gf are having trouble figuring out what we dont like and what we do

Its going to be our first threesome with another girl (which is her friend) would a checklist be a good idea so we dont cross boundaries or is that TOO indepth.

I know we will have a few drinks so I want something in writing to keep me aware of what will be happening. I am going to limit my drinking and let her have a few if she feels the need to. But I am the one who can mess things up, so I want to know what I can and can't do.

As of right now the deal is whatever the 2 girls do to me is okay but I can't initiate or make any action towards the other girl. I can take action to my girlfriend but nothing with the other girl unless my girl tells her to do something.

We have talked about this while not in FANTASY LAND and it has helped but I know my girlfriend will try to change the rules in the heat of the battle as you guys say.

So, I guess being the good guy as I am, my goal is to make the rules and follow them regardless of what they tell me when there drunk? Is that what all you pro swingers would do? I guess better safe then sorry then me doing this or that and ruining things.

Thanks

[good times]

Sounds like you are being set up to fail to me.

Originally Posted by testingwaters

As of right now the deal is whatever the 2 girls do to me is okay but I can't initiate or make any action towards the other girl. I can take action to my girlfriend but nothing with the other girl unless my girl tells her to do something.

It sounds to me like you are doing your thinking with the little head here. I cannot think of any other reason why one would agree to this type of one sided rule. Interestingly, these are the kind of rules we see so often from folks that the wife/girlfriend is only doing it at all to make her husband/boyfriend happy.

So to answer your original question, no, I don't think this is a good idea, and I would handle it by saying, "no deal". In other words, if you have these doubts of a good outcome now, don't do it at all until you come to an understanding that removes these doubts.

[tiger4play]

I agree with good times..... this is not a good idea. Either your gf is not ready to accept you being with someone else or you are too afraid you'll displease yourself or your gf to have this succeed. If you are just beginning to figure out what kind of relationships you both are into.... you might want to wait until you are both sure of what you want and don't want. A list isn't going to help make it work.... and I think communication is essential between all three of you BEFORE any sexual moves are made. Give all three of you some time to talk about this. No deal is my vote too!

[JustAskJulie]

the above two. If she's still changing the rules, she's not ready. Until you can both agree and trust each other to stay in the boundaries without feeling the need to have it in writing, you're not ready. If you have so many rules that you need to have them in writing, you probably have too many rules (jmo).