soft swinging?

[SweetTooth24]

this sounds like something me and my husband would like to do, more so than have sex with other couples. we have found a couple actually that we are interested to do this with, we are really good friends actually. but i think my friends husband isnt too sure about this. not that he doesnt want to do this, because im pretty sure he does, i think that he is...maybe shy? i dont know. we have all talked about this before. what should i say to him so he is more comfortable. we all flirt with eachother, weve all done other things with eachother that isnt too daring, we always have a good time. im really wanting to do this, and im especially attracted to my friend. any advice on any of this? i feel like im kind of jumbled....

[JustAskJulie]

A few questions for you....

why do you want to do this? What do you consider soft swinging (keep in mind it includes everything short of having actual intercourse with another couple). Make sure that the other couple is aware of what your limits are.

Are you willing to risk your friendship to expand and satisfy a fantasy? Swinging with friends can be a risky venture, especially when both couples are newbies to the idea. There are so many "what ifs" involved and possibilities of where things could go wrong. If anyone ends up wishing things hadn't happen it can leave your friendship in a very awkward state, if not destroy it.

[SweetTooth24]

wel we have been friends for about a year, and we had been talking about doing "something" for probably the last 4 months? they will be moving in a few months, im not worried about the friendship being ruined...at all.

what im mostly wantingis for her and i to touch and kiss, and have the guys in the room adn then join us, and i have sex with my husband, her with her husband, i dont mind my husband touching her, same goes for her husbadn and me. a lot of those things have been talked about. i mostly just want to experience this. it turns me on, and even the thought of my husband kissing or touchign her is a turn on. im not a very jealous person. i think it will also add a spark to our relationship. we have a good strong relationship...this could be exciting for us.

[Cpl2share]

Then do it! But prepare yourself first. Being jelous of the idea is not the same as being jelous of the act. You will find a lot of swingers who say: "It is good to make friends out of swingers, but never make swingers out of friends." This is usually good advice. In this case I would say: Damn the torpedos, full speed ahead. You are taking a big step. You want to do it with people you know and are comfortable with, but if the friendship goes to hell, they are moving soon anyway, so not much lost. If things go well, you will have some friends that you can visit once in a while for a fun filled vacation.

[ViSexual]

The fact they're going to be moving away makes this OK. This way, there'd be no continuing drama if there's hard feelings with anyone afterwards.

And, if it goes well, then you could have nice visits every now and then too!

You sound cool! I like a lady with such a healthy and honest attitude. The other husband is the one to be careful with though. Make sure he's really for this. I'd suggest that you start things by flirting with him a lot. Make it his idea for this to actually happen.

Good luck and enjoy!

[spamcatcher]

The term "soft swinging" can be very misleading. We played with a couple of "soft swingers" last weekend, and did more wild and nasty things with them than with some couples we've had intercourse with. Soft swingers with a wide variety of kinks can be a lot more fun than full-swap, missionary position types.

But, as always, everyone must respect boundaries!

[SweetTooth24]

Originally Posted by ViSexual

The fact they're going to be moving away makes this OK. This way, there'd be no continuing drama if there's hard feelings with anyone afterwards.

And, if it goes well, then you could have nice visits every now and then too!

You sound cool! I like a lady with such a healthy and honest attitude. The other husband is the one to be careful with though. Make sure he's really for this. I'd suggest that you start things by flirting with him a lot. Make it his idea for this to actually happen.

Good luck and enjoy!

hey THANKS for the great compliment and to everyone, thanks for your advice i appreciate it!