Need some Expert advice. Looking to start swinging.

[Moose998]

Hi,
We are a married couple of 13 yrs, with two kids. survived lucky 13. Starting on 14 great years and more to come. My wife is my soul mate and friend and love her to death. She is just a wonderful person to be around and the life of the party, me the quiet one until I get to know someone
This is my first post on this message site and all related posts have been great and very helpful so far. My delema starts with my wife, she spoke out of the blue that we should try swinging. In my mind I visualized my fantasy of swinging and expanding our sexual side and loved the idea. We have talked about it ,(before we got connected to the internet)and now she is only wanting a threesome FMF. She said she doesnt think she could go ahead be with another guy, I always let her know my fantasy is to watch her with another man and give her the go ahead that it would be hot. She always says that since having two kids no one would want to look at her ugly body, I always let her know that she is a knock out and there are guys that would love to be with her. She is beutiful person and has a nice body. I have a little extra padding and I should be the one worried but I am comfortable with my body and I look for the inner beuity of the person not what body type.Wife has both the inner and outer beuty. Should I take it slow and have a threesome with another female and see where it goes from there and talk to her more about bringing in a couple for both to enjoy. I want her to enjoy another man and I want to enjoy another women together. I Love the Idea that she was the one bringing up the subject what do i do scooby do.

Thanks for your help.

[two42lovers]

Take it slow and be laid back about everything. Yes, it will be a lot easier for her to play with another woman if she is open to another couple, but let her explore her turn ons and grow from there. There are plenty of soft swap couples and couples who are only into having the women play, then it's same bed play with your own partner. Have fun!

[2inSanDiego4u]

Since you're new be sure to check out the "Archives" and "Curious About Swinging" areas of the site.

The best advice we can give is to communicate absolutely everything with each other, take it slow, and stay within both of your comfort zones. If she is more comfortable starting out with a threesome/FMF, then that is how you should start, unless this is something you are very uncomfortable with yourself. Keep telling her that it is your fantasy to see her with another guy, that she is beautiful and that any guy would be lucky to have her for a night! You'll find that her confidence will probably increase very quickly once you're in the lifestyle. FWIW, we also chose to start with a threesome, and it was an incredible experience for both of us! Good luck!

[lustylearning]

Welcome!

Many of us have felt the way she feels. The most amazing cure for us was going to a club and discovering that the way we saw ourselves was not the way others saw us. It was like walking out of a prison cell.

Good luck, good journey, and happy hunting!

[SecretAsianMan]

Welcome & good luck to you. Communication is the key - maybe just going out to "social" events where there would be no play or activities just to MEET the people will help reassure her that we're not all "Ken & Barbie" types in this lifestyle.

[gatorvol64]

Bring your wife here. To the board. There are plenty of threads that deal with this. Look around, let her hear how others have dealt with the same issue. After baby bodies are just not the same as before baby bodies. I've learned to view stretch marks and such as my "battle scars" and am proud of where I've been to attain them.

Again, my best advice is to bring her here. And, as long as you are comfortable with the situation, start the way she feels comfortable. Starting with FMF doesn't mean you won't enjoy other combinations later. Its a journey where you take it.

Vol

[Moose998]

Thanks to all that responded. I will take your advice