New to all this.....but it's about to change. Suggestions??

[sweet_tna]

Originally Posted by nymphocpl69

Thanks for the kind words Sweet. The people here have been superb!! I had always read that swingers were some of the friendliest people around.

As to your suggestion, where would you say for us to play? We do not want to have anyone know where we live.......and we don't feel comfortable enough going to this gentleman's home as even though he is very nice, he is still someone we do not know well.

We are going to meet him at a public place first so Mrs. Nympho can meet him. We are most likely not going to do anything with him. This is just a meet 'n greet for him and my wife.

Massage it is then!!!!!!

You're most welcome, and I concur with the others' suggestions of a hotel room. You are very right that this is someone you don't know well and neutral ground is idea. I just meant that the hotel room wouldn't be the best place to start the evening.

"Worst case" scenario is that things don't click and you and your lovely wife have the room all to yourselves.

=)

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by nymphocpl69

I apologize to Julie if there was a misunderstanding in my words. Jealously will not factor in one bit as I have had 2 years to delve into the aspect of seeing my wife give and recieve sexual pleasure from another man. I know there will be lots of nerves on both our parts. However, as the husband going to be involved in a MFM threesome, I feel that my nervousness will be a bit greater. Yes I know my wife will probably be nervous as hell too. The gentleman has assured me that he is not here to take over. He assures me that it is all about my wife and I and we are in control at all times. If one of us says to stop for any reason, he will abide. He says he is just here to provide a fantasy for a husband and wife who love each other.

It sounds like your biggest fear really is that you might end up feeling left out and/or that this other guy might kind of take over the evening (thus leaving you feeling left out)... or perhaps that your wife might enjoy him more than you and even push you away.

All of these things can happen (and have happened to people at various times). The best thing to do is to make sure that both you and he agree up front that this is a) about your wife and her pleasure. This is as important for you to understand as it is for him. In doing this you can focus YOUR attention on her primarily and not be worried about which one of the two guys might be getting more. If you are worried about him taking over... again make sure everyone knows it's about your wife and her pleasure. She should be the one leading the way and if any directing is done it should be by her only. And make sure that both you and your wife agree upfront that if at any point either of you feels uncomfortable you stop right then and regroup. If you start feeling like he's taking over or like you are getting shoved out of the picture then you should stop things and reassess the situation.

Another common bit of nervousness in these situations is just the fact that there is another guy in the room. Many men feel a bit of homophobia in those situations... will my dick have to touch his dick? what if we accidently touch each other? What if he is bi and hasn't told us and he tries to do something with me? You can't answer all the what ifs. All you can do is enjoy the moment and if something happens that makes you uncomfortable speak up. The two of you will probably touch at some point, that doesn't mean either of you are gay. It does mean that you are both being attentive to the same woman without being so caught up in your own fears that you feel the need to stay on opposite poles.

Originally Posted by nymphocpl69

where would you say for us to play? We do not want to have anyone know where we live.......and we don't feel comfortable enough going to this gentleman's home as even though he is very nice, he is still someone we do not know well.

I think you have pretty well answered your own question on this one. Your best bet is going to be a hotel. It is a neutral location to start with and you don't have to worry about telling someone where you live OR feeling like you are someone else's turf.

[nymphocpl69]

To those who asked to keep apprised of the situation..........wife and I are set to meet this gentleman tomorrow night at a club for a little bit of drinking, a little bit of dancing and a lot of conversation. Wife says if she likes him and all goes well, she will want to do the deed!!!!!

Any last suggestions????

Wish us luck!!!

[fun4Ds]

So how did it go ?

[nymphocpl69]

Well it is now the day after and all I can say is..........WOW. We met the gentleman at the club and had about an hour of great conversation. My wife and he hit it off pretty well. We talked about anything and everything. Towards the end of the meeting, he excused himself to go to the restroom. At this point, I asked my wife what she thought. She said the she thought he was very nice and had a great personality. Now when we first planned this meeting, my wife was clear that this was only to be a meeting to talk to him. At some point in the days leading up to yesterday, my wife stated that if things went well with the meeting and she felt comfortable with him, she was willing to do the 3some. I was like WHOOOOA.

I finally got up the nerve to ask my wife since she liked him if she wanted to do it. She stated yes. I was utterly SHOCKED. I asked her one more time if she was absolutely sure. She again said yes. At this point, my heart was pounding. So I got up and went to the restroom. I got there and asked him to stop and talk. I asked him how he thought the meeting was going. He said he was enjoying himself and that he liked my wife. So I told him of my wife's wish. He said he was fine with it. So I told him that when we walked back to the table, to just formally ask my wife if she wanted to go back to his place. We walked over to the table, sat down and after a little bit more of small talk, he asked her if we wanted to go to his place. My wife looked at me and I smiled at her and told her it was her decision. She then looked back at him and said YES. We then immediately got up from the table and went to our respective cars. I followed him.

During the ride, I was an utter mess. I was extremely nervous and felt ill. LOL. To my surprise, my wife was 100% calm. I asked her if she was nervous. She said no. I asked her why. She said that this was just going to be sex....nothing more. I wished I had her confidence. I thought it was ironic that I was the nervous wreck and she was the one who was calm. Anyways, we talked about what was about to happen. She told me that she loved me to no end and that I was her husband and would never have anyone take my place. I will always have her heart....this guy was only going to have her body for a few hours. This calmed me very much.

When we got to his place, we parked. As my wife and I were about to get out, I wanted to kiss her one last time as a symbol that I was about to no longer be the the only man to have her body to myself. We got out and went into his apartment. As we got comfortable, we had a bit more of small talk. I then asked him for a glass of water and my mouth was very dry. After he gave me a glass, I proceeded to think to myself "might as well get this going". I likened it to my fear of roller coasters in my teen years. I was deathly afraid of getting on them. Then one day, I said "what the hell" and got in line to get on my first one. All the while waiting in line, I was sick to my stomach. As I got on the coaster, I felt like throwing up. But I had finally done it. So I conjured up this moment of my youth and told my wife and him to let's get this started and not waste time. I told him of a couple rules to follow. He totally agreed. As he was sitting on the sofa next to my wife, he began to massage her breasts. He did this quite well. He then started moving his hands down to her skirt and slide them under it. As he was beginning to finger my wife, she looked at me. I looked at her lovingly and whispered "I love you". She whispered it back to me. Then she closed her eyes and began to enjoy his touch. After a few minutes, the clothes started to come off. First he unbuttoned her top and she helped him. Her breasts were exposed. This was the first time she has been naked in any manner with another man in 7 years. Then she finally reached over and started to massage his cock through his pants. He then unbuttoned her skirt. She stood up and slid it down for him. I began to feel VERY turned on and surprisingly more relaxed. As he was caressing her in just her panties, she sat back down and he stood up. He began to take off his clothes. Finally, he stood there....naked.....in front of my wife. He sat down on the sofa next to her and began to slide down her panties. She allowed him to do so. And there it was......my wife and another man.....naked together on the sofa next to each other. He continued to kiss and lick her breasts and my wife reached over and grabbed his naked cock. Another first......my wife holding another man's cock in her hand for the first time in 7 years. By this point, all my nerves had gone away, and I removed all my clothes as I sat there and just watched her enjoy his touch. After 15 minutes if just them massaging each other, I strolled over and she grabbed my cock. She was very much enjoying playing with 2 cocks for the first time. I finally suggested we all move to the bedroom.

I won't go into all the details.....I will say this. It was rather disappointing in a way. The other gentleman was having a difficult time getting hard. He finally did get an erection. I laid her on her back, and I fucked her first as he watched. After about 5 minutes, I decided it was time for him to fuck my wife. I pulled out and he took my place between her legs. She opened her legs wide and let him penetrate her. I decided to just sit back and watch this glorious moment that I had fantasized about for soooooo long. It was finally happening. There it was. I was finally watching another man fuck my wife.

They fucked for about 10 minutes. My wife was moaning in pleasure. She was enjoying him. But disappointment set in again as he pulled out of her and he was losing his erection. The rest of the time my wife and I were there, we had sex while he was trying to get aroused. But it was to no avail. After another 30 minutes passed of just my wife and I having sex while he watched trying to get it up, he said that he just couldn't do it. We told him that it was ok. He said that it most likely was a combination of him working a long day and the 2-3 drinks he had during our meeting at the club. My wife and I got up and got dressed and thanked him. He again apologized and asked if we would allow him a 2nd "date" so that he could make it up to us. We agreed and told him to call us whenever he wanted to try again.

I will say this. I never in my wildest dreams thought this would happen. On our way home, my wife and I talked about the experience and agreed that it was VERY erotic and enjoyable (even though he didn't really fuck her). We told each other that it was very fun and that we would like to begin to do this once every couple months. But the main thing is that neither of us had any guilty feelings. We had another round of hot sex when we got home. We went to sleep and woke up this morning with no feelings of guilt. This was a relief to me. We then went for round 4 after we woke up and things have been great all day.

I have read many threads on here that once the "deed" is done, that either you will feel guilty or you won't. And if you do not feel guilty feelings the day after, that the relationship will become even stronger and you will grow closer. I am positive that this is the way my wife and I are headed. The experience (although didn't happen quite the way we had hoped) was awesome. And we plan on doing it again and again!!!!!

Sorry for the long post. Just wanted to share our 1st time with everyone.

[Dynamar]

Great post... thanks for sharing.