What do you tell others about where you are when swinging?

[Cpl2share]

We always tell at least part of the truth. The biggest question that we get is: How/where did you meet them? I am not a big social animal, so it really surprises our families when we do go out. We just explain that it was a customer of mine that I seemed to hit it off with, and decided to go out for drinks. Works for us.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by winnme

We always say we are out of town or going clubing and some time we just get missing.but we almost all the time go to a swinger club at Myrtle Beach South Carolina it is hott for swinger its call Cfriends Couple clud

Hi There Winnme!! Welcome to the board! We are hoping to get up to SC sometime this year and check out some of the clubs up that way.

[graygo98]

We are really tight with J's family (parents and sister). Almost daily calls to just chat about stuff. (No, we aren't real sucks, they are just funny smart people that we enjoy.)

When asked "what are you doing on Saturday/did you do on Saturday" we just used to say we went dancing. Used to name a club downtown. The problem now is her sister thinks it would be great to come dancing with us. (One of our vanilla couple friends wants to do the same.) We are just not going any where near there! So we're now a lot vaguer... "Oh, just out with some friends." Which leads to ....

"So, who are these friends?" Fortunately I have worked in a few places and a long time ago went to school in a few more. Amazing how those old acquaintances keep popping up.

I am all for just telling them plain out. After all, we are just about hitting that half-century mark so we shouldn't still have to lie to our parents about our friends or "hobbies". J is just not willing to take that step at the moment. I am not really sure sometimes if we are really fooling anyone, especially her sister though, from some comments she had dropped.

[rpu3]

Luckily, I guess, we don't have children nor do we have family nearby, considering we do go to clubs occasionally and both of us have friends we see occasionally. No excuses have to be made.

However, we don't go to the club when my nephew is in my custody for breaks and the summer. We usually work it out by alternating newphew prison guard duties in order to seeing our respective friends if opportunities arise.

My sister typically e-mails or calls on Thursday (during Survivor, grrrr...) and asks what we are doing for the weekend. She has been told that we are "alternative"", so I can head all questions off with a "you don't really want to know what either one of us are doing this weekend". Actually, I like doing that.

Everyone else gets the standard truth: "I'm doing laundry and XYZ home improvement project, and if we are lucky, we will go out for a while". Nobody cares what you are doing once you bore them with laundry, I've found.

[cplnuswing]

For most, we just use the basic "going out for the evening" or "wanted to get away for the weekend." The Mrs. does have two people who aren't content to leave it at that with no further comment - her mother, and her best friend.

When her mother calls, it's like:

"Oh, you're not home?" Nope.

"Where are you at" Went away for the weekend.

"Oh. Where to?" City name, why do you ask?

"Oh, just in case I needed to get in touch with you" Just call my cell just like do every other time you call.

"Why are you going there?" Because we always have fun.

"Oh. Doing what?" Going out.

"Going out??" Going out.

"Out where?" You know, just around

"But what are you going to do?" Go out

By this time why are both trying to contain our laughter. It's become almost a tradition really. Every time we make a weekend club trip, it happens, so wouldn't seem the same without it. It reminds us of way back when and she would go through the same thrust and parry on her way out the door on a Saturday night. The cell call is always followed up by the call to the house to see if the munchkin or the babysitter has any more info they can give up on what we are really doing.


With the best friend, it's like -

"y'all sure do like to go up there. Y'all are up to something I think" Shoulder shrug. Just goin' out

[winnme]

Well, if it's cool with you guys, let us know when you are in the area

[graygo98]

Originally Posted by rpu3

My sister typically e-mails or calls on Thursday (during Survivor, grrrr...) and asks what we are doing for the weekend. She has been told that we are "alternative"", so I can head all questions off with a "you don't really want to know what either one of us are doing this weekend". Actually, I like doing that.

Now this I really like! A one-time "sort of" admission, and from then on its your free pass from the third degree.

How far did you go into explaining what "alternative" is?

[screaminggood]

"Work" dinners are very convenient...then you don't have to explain to vanilla friends, kids, or family why they aren't invited.

[lovelygirl2]

Hubby is in a local band - so we always can say we met people through that. Or we can say there's a show that night.

Only problem I find is when there actually is a show that conflicts with a good meet & greet we want to go to

[captainbob]

Originally Posted by good times

We usually say we stayed home and played Scrabble. Nobody has ever asked any further details about the Scrabble.

Who won? What was the score?

I once played naked scrabble. Winner got oral sex. If I remember right, she poured maple syrup on it and it was wonderful!

[Chris&Amelia]

What did you get for a triple word score?

[two4youinswva]

Originally Posted by Chris&Amelia

What did you get for a triple word score?

+1

(And stop reading my mind)

[AdultSocials]

If we are talking to family and vanilla friends - they get "we went out with some friends" or "so and so had a party" .... yes vauge responses. Since we have become friends with some of the couples we play with we just tell them where were. We don't have children so it is much easier. The pets don't care what we are up to :-)

[rpu3]

Originally Posted by graygo98

Now this I really like! A one-time "sort of" admission, and from then on its your free pass from the third degree.

How far did you go into explaining what "alternative" is?

Well, that's a different story. The short version is in asking us about a resort, she did a very judgmental "are YOU one of those SWINGERS?". I responded that I didn't really think of myself as a swinger, but tended towards "consensual nonmongamist". And then a minute later, "yes, I have sex with other people." Neither one of us has been questioned since, nor have we heard anything other judgmental comments about swingers, et al.

She had called while I was out of town recently; when I spoke to her myself on Tuesday, she asked a million questions about my weekend, but avoided the big 'un. Smart move; don't ask if you aren't ready to hear the answer, because I was prepared with the truth!

[ktimephoenix]

Originally Posted by good times

We usually say we stayed home and played Scrabble. Nobody has ever asked any further details about the Scrabble.

LOL this is classic.

We're lucky in that we don't often mix friendship groups (work/uni/his friends/ her friends/mutual friends etc), so if we say we're going out with friends, each group assumes it's with the other group, and that invites aren't to be expected. it was like that BEFORE we started to swing. having relatives in other states also will help cover any interstate trips.

we have a couple of close friends that don't swing, but know we do. we just tell them the truth (and generally get interviewed afterwards because they think it's fascinating).