Alberta couple,thinking of exploring the lifestyle

[magiriano]

Hello,
First of all congratulations on this wonderful board.
We`re a profesional interasial couple,she is asian,I am caucasian(tall dark and handsome,and I know it too ),and,we`re toying with the idea of swinging.
We`re both DD free,and while I am a smoker and a social drinker,she doesn`t smoke,and is allergic to alcohol.
Since I know her my wife always liked tall dark and handsome men,and while boobs are not important,I love a nice ,round,tiny bubble butt and dark skin on a woman.
We`re both turned on by black people,I know she likes black guys and I like watching black girls,although I`ve never been with one.
We like to go people watching,and,she poins out to me sometimes beautiful ladies and I tell her that a guy we walk by is good looking.We have the same taste about males and females.
I am a very flirtatious man,and,I do it even while I am with my wife,because I know she is confortable with me,and she knows I`d never cross the line.She doesn`t mind it at all,in fact,I feel that she`s encouraging me to do so.
She is confortable with me hanging around with her and her gf`s or female coworkers,and,If I ever tell her that someone is hot,she agrees,and talk about how hot she thinks that woman is and what are her best features (eyes,boobs,ass).
She`s the best lover I`ve ever had and I was quite a player while in college.
I however never experienced the fmf 3 some,and when I asked my wife how would she feel about it she said she`s not into girls,but she might consider a mfm thing.However,in the past she did told me there`s a woman at her work place,that is middle aged,however is sobeautiful that it turns her on.
I`d love to see her having sex with another man while I`d have sex with another woman.
Due to some work related things,we`ve been separated for a couple of years now (I am investing in Romania,however the health system here does not allow for my very young 2 children to be here) so the children and my wife are in Canada,while I am in Romania.
A few days ago,my wife suggested that we should take one of the hedonistic vacations,but I am not sure if she wants it because she`d like to be watched ,or to swing,or she was maybe just horny that day.....
Whenever we meet,we always get a hotel room,go out for diner,dancing then make love untill we can`t move anymore.We tried and enjoyed everything so far,from vanilla,to bdsm,to strapon sex,and so far everything went smoothly,she`s willing to try anything once.And then she likes it.
We`re both very sensual,and romantic and we love eachother to pieces,however,I got a few issues,being betrayed , cheated and financially ruined in the past by other women .
I am thinking more around the lines of taking her to a hotel (she`s a travel agent,great discount rates ) make love all afternoon and then take her to diner,and end up in a off premises club(I`m not sure if in Calgary there are on premises clubs) and take it from there.Things would go a lot easyer with strawberries and champagne,however she cannot drink,so the chocolate and strawberies will have to do.
I am not confortable at this point with full swinging,but I`d like to try soft swinging,maybe FF and oral sex for now.
Would I feel guilty the next day,would she feel used if I don`t talk to her about it first?
I know she likes surprises and she knows I am very sexually adventurous,however I`d hate to ruin my marriage.
I`ve been looking for months all over the internet trying to read about the pro and con`s of swinging,however,swingers say it`s a great experiance to have and nonswingers are usually just uptight asses.
Does anybody have a swinging experience that wasn`t ok,or,do you know of any forum (board ) that talks about the pro`s and con`s of swinging?
She knows I am contemplating the idea,and although we do everything imaginable in our bedroom,she`s not an easy woman,so I`d hate for her to imagine that I think less about her.
Should I go for the off premises club idea or should I go with her on a hedonistic resort?How are the Hedonism resorts anyway?
Anybody in Calgary Ab knows of a classy swinging club?

[screaminggood]

You should ask her what she's hoping you two will find at an hedonistic resort. She obviously has something in mind...and it may not be the FF that you are hoping for. Ask yourself if YOU are ready for it though because you're subconsciously slowing yourself down from the hedonistic club she suggested to off-premise--there's a huge difference. As always, you should be talking to your partner before you go anywhere. Happy Hunting!

[magiriano]

Originally Posted by screaminggood

You should ask her what she's hoping you two will find at an hedonistic resort. She obviously has something in mind...and it may not be the FF that you are hoping for. Ask yourself if YOU are ready for it though because you're subconsciously slowing yourself down from the hedonistic club she suggested to off-premise--there's a huge difference. As always, you should be talking to your partner before you go anywhere. Happy Hunting!

I somehow think that my wife might just wanna explore her voyeuristic side of her,since,we did in the past teased the security cameras in hotels by making love in the swimming pool or in the jacuzzi.However,she also thinks that I am in touch with my feminine side,and she said b4 that she`d be ok with a MFM experience.
She had a coworker that told her that her marriage fell apart due to swinging when they become involved and prefered particular members of their swinging group,so my guess is that my wife might be affraid of one of us taking a particular interes in some 1/2 of a couple.
All I can say is that so far I consider myself swing curious,I`d be ok with soft swinging and see where it leads us,but I am not confortable jumping into full swinging just yet.
And I really don`t know what to expect from a hedonism resort.

[AlbertaSwing]

magiriano says:

"Anybody in Calgary Ab knows of a classy swinging club?"

I would recommend going to the CalgaryAdultPlayground or CAPC for short. This is a very classy club and we have enjoyed going there every time we went. Of the three clubs in Calgary this one is the most upscale. You can look at their website at the following link:

www.calgaryadultplaygroundclub.com

[BradAndJanet]

As much as I think surprising your spouse with a trip to a club is not such a good idea in general, I've read what you've said and it would probably go OK in your case. I'd give her the option to say, "no" just beforehand, however and not just pull into the parking lot.

Welcome to the board! Keep us posted.

-B

[SouthBond]

No matter what you do, be sure that both of you are on the same page. Swinging is probably going to be the most fun that you have ever had. But you and your spouse have got to be in agreement on your comfort zones. Depending on your financial situation, I highly recommend going to a resort. Then proceed as you feel comfortable. You will find a great group of people. You can do whatever makes you feel good. You determine the boundaries and they will be respected. Sex is fun and you sound like you are ready to explore the Wonderful World of Swinging.

[magiriano]

Originally Posted by BradAndJanet

As much as I think surprising your spouse with a trip to a club is not such a good idea in general, I've read what you've said and it would probably go OK in your case. I'd give her the option to say, "no" just beforehand, however and not just pull into the parking lot.

Welcome to the board! Keep us posted.

-B

As I mentioned,we`re a very sexual,very erotic and exotic couple,and she likes surprises.
I used to write and email her phantesy stories and she was turned on by them,and,she loved them.I am sure that even if we might not go along with full swinging,she wouldn`t mind soft swinging or a night of an erotic charged atmsphere at an off premises club.Besides,she was the first to mention the resort on the first place,however,we didn`t had a vacation for so long that I`d hate to spoil one in a place we might feel unconfortable.

The other thing is,altho I love the stretch marks and her C section mark (it reminds me of the sacrifice she made to have my babies,is that a major turn off in the lifestyle?
Do couples where female has C section and stretch marks have a harder time finding good looking couples?

[BradAndJanet]

Most older people have a few 'battle scars'. Comes with experience.

People will understand, no worries.

-B