Missed Wife's Signal and now she feels I broke a rule

[twoplayful2]

...I was being sarcastic. She doesnt owe you one, that's silly. If that's what it was about then you'd be in it for all the wrong reasons. Not saying you implied that is what is was about, saying I made a joke and I'm now explaining it. And then was saying that I should have added the wink at the end of my original sarcastic little joke.

[WesternSwing]

Wow. It's good you have rule of some kind or another, but you both are not on the same page when it comes to following them. Of course, you've pretty much set yourself up for failure with subtle gestures such as blinking. What if someone had something in thier eye and you thought they wanted Quasimoto!

The other problem I see is that you both have decided that full swapping is for you, but then you make the gauge for how each screwed-up by making the distinction between soft and full swap. I think there is no difference when you are talking about if someone crossed the line. The problem here is that your line is definitive. A blink, a hand motion, a wiggle of your butt, whatever, is not as good as getting together alone for just 30 seconds and asking "Is all systems "go"?"

We have some general rules and after that anything goes, a list that has gotten much shorter. The basics for us:

1. No glove, no love
2. Same room only
3. We don't "take one for the team". If we aren't both into a couple we don't play with them.

There are others such as which sex acts are off limits, but those are personal preferences, not "rules" about having sex with others like above. Stuff like Mrs. WS only likes anal with me (it's a trust thing). If she wanted to with someone else, as long as the above rules were followed, then it would be okay.

My advice? What happened, happened. You can go back and change it, so being pissed-off at each other isn't going to move you forward. You learned from it, now move on. Besides, you went in another room with the other wife (although your wife joined shortly, I mean at what point did she realize you were gone??? And what took her so long???) Then she had sex with someone thinking she had your approval, just like you did going to the bedroom with the other lady. You are splitting hairs here. And very fine hairs too, I might add.

Get over it, get on the same page with realistic "signals" like actually talking to eachother. And have fun.

Mr. WS

[couple_ps]

Originally Posted by WesternSwing

Wow. It's good you have rule of some kind or another, but you both are not on the same page when it comes to following them. Of course, you've pretty much set yourself up for failure with subtle gestures such as blinking. What if someone had something in thier eye and you thought they wanted Quasimoto!

The other problem I see is that you both have decided that full swapping is for you, but then you make the gauge for how each screwed-up by making the distinction between soft and full swap. I think there is no difference when you are talking about if someone crossed the line. The problem here is that your line is definitive. A blink, a hand motion, a wiggle of your butt, whatever, is not as good as getting together alone for just 30 seconds and asking "Is all systems "go"?"

We have some general rules and after that anything goes, a list that has gotten much shorter. The basics for us:

1. No glove, no love
2. Same room only
3. We don't "take one for the team". If we aren't both into a couple we don't play with them.

There are others such as which sex acts are off limits, but those are personal preferences, not "rules" about having sex with others like above. Stuff like Mrs. WS only likes anal with me (it's a trust thing). If she wanted to with someone else, as long as the above rules were followed, then it would be okay.

My advice? What happened, happened. You can go back and change it, so being pissed-off at each other isn't going to move you forward. You learned from it, now move on. Besides, you went in another room with the other wife (although your wife joined shortly, I mean at what point did she realize you were gone??? And what took her so long???) Then she had sex with someone thinking she had your approval, just like you did going to the bedroom with the other lady. You are splitting hairs here. And very fine hairs too, I might add.

Get over it, get on the same page with realistic "signals" like actually talking to eachother. And have fun.

Mr. WS

Yes, I have realised that what happened, happened, I am moving on We now know that we need better ways of communicating.