so this is spam

[JustAskJulie]

In discussing this thread and issue with my other half we've come to the agreement that part of the problem is perhaps in the definitions (or lack thereof) provided. I will take blame for that, if it is at all unclear what the MeetUp forums is for then I need to work on that and rewrite the threads stated.

The term "Meet Up" is not trademarked. However, Alura is correct in stating that the MeetUp forum is strictly for Swingers Board Meetups. With that said, perhaps the forum needs to be renaed "Swingers Board Meetups" to make that more clear. I think I will do so. Perhaps it will cut down on some of the mod work of having to remove posts that don't belong there.

Another definition that perhaps isn't made clear enough on this board is that of a "club" - which as far as this site is concerned is any regular organized gathering of swingers (whether at a club building or set location or rotating locations). Any such gathering can be posted to our club listings and once approved can then post their meeting/event information to the event calender. However, as stated in the board guidelines,

1. No Spamming/Advertising of any kind. That means coming to this board and advertising goods or service (whether or not you are making a profit from doing so), whether it is directly or indirectly. Spammers will not receive a warning and will have their privileges revoked on the first offense.

This includes Club Owners/Hosts. The forums are NOT for advertising your clubs. If someone is looking for info on clubs in your area in the Club Requests forum you may provide your information. Any other advertising of your club(s) in the forums is not allowed. Club information may be posted in the Club Listings section. Once your listing is approved you will be given access to post your event info to the Events Calendar.

.

As to the issue of whether or not the pm to you was rude or offensive, it obviously was to you because you took it that way... and I have a feeling that you took it that way mostly because you know it was true. Had your post really been unintentional I think you would have just said "hey sorry didn't mean to" and dropped it. Did you spam the board? YES. Did you do it intentionally? Maybe, maybe not, it depends on whether or not you knew what you were posting should not have been posted there.

While many other forums allow people to post event info and personal ads all over the place, this site is different, because as has already been stated the purpose of this site is different.

Last but not least... does sex occur at Swingers Board meetups? I'm fairly sure it has and it probably will again... but that is not the main purpose. I'll see what I can do about updating those definitions to help prevent future confusion.

[twoforone100]

We were upset because we did not know and don't like to be called names. We got a pm from goodtimes that pointed out exactly where we had made our mistakes. That pm would have and did not caused an issue. It is an issue of rules which we agree we did make a mistake. If others have made this same mistake then perhaps it is an issue with the rules. We do follow all the rules if they are easy to understand and clear. Laura That is true there is something we like to call cyber cracks. Jokes and what people mean are often confused. You know the email was not intended as harsh because you know him. Others new to the board might not. I am sure that being a mod like most things can sometimes cause you to lose sight that everyone who breaks one of your rules is not a spammer. Cops have this same problem where they only see evil in people. No harm no foul. We won't lose sleep over it but when we feel slighted here on in person we will speak up. We will ask questions. Sorry for the trouble and sorry we jumped a little quick when we felt insulted. On most of the other boards we are on ( not swinger related) the mods are much more polite. We do know how trying it can be when people can't or don't read. We do agree we did not read well enough at first. We do feel like the rules are unclear. We do feel the email was rude. We agree we assumed it was harsher than it was and everyone is correct that this is the internet and what does it matter anyways. Hope everyone has fun at your meet up. Patrick Pattie

[Alura]

Thanks, Julie! I think your clairfications will help a lot.

Meet Up! is not trademarked? That surprises me. I think it should be because of its uniqueness.

I think you're right that the name of the forum should be changed to Swingers Board Meet Ups! Maybe the exclamation point should be deleted. It's impossible to get people to always remember to include it and its use causes punctuation to look strange if the term is used in the middle of a sentence. I have always used it but I'm the monitor of the forum so my involvement makes it easier to remember.

Mr. Alura

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I'll see what I can do about updating those definitions to help prevent future confusion.

Thanks for your post, Julie. It clears up a lot. I think your updates will help many.

By the way, I appreciate this board, and the very unique quality your board has: staying conversational and interesting, rather than being a meat market.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by Alura

Thanks, Julie! I think your clairfications will help a lot.

Meet Up! is not trademarked? That surprises me. I think it should be because of its uniqueness.

I think you're right that the name of the forum should be changed to Swingers Board Meet Ups! Maybe the exclamation point should be deleted. It's impossible to get people to always remember to include it and its use causes punctuation to look strange if the term is used in the middle of a sentence. I have always used it but I'm the monitor of the forum so my involvement makes it easier to remember.

Mr. Alura

Nope, it's not and I don't consider it my own invention. Forums of all types have Meet Ups - and there is even a meetup.com that helps people arrange meet ups for particular interests. Those types of Meet ups are really the same ideal that we were going for when we organized the first meet up (which was actually at a swinger social, by the way). The ideal being to allow people with similar interests to meet face to face and get to know one another. In the case of forum (whether this one or others) Meet Ups, the people typically already know each other by words so it adds something extra in that it becomes not just about meeting people with similar interests but about finally getting to see/meet in person those you have been talking with and debating with online for however long. I feel like it also adds an extra level of comeraderie (sp?) on the board between those who have had the opportunity to meet in person.

The point is to make the meetup something that anyone who participates in the board can attend. This is why we don't just sponsor events at a local swinger club, or just attend a club as a group... instead we try to make it an event with different things to do (mostly vanilla) and sometimes we throw in a trip to a swinger club (if enough people are ok with it) AFTER there have been plenty of opportunities for people to get to know each other in a comfortable vanilla setting - that way if some are not comfortable with going to a swinger club they don't have to go but they still get to enjoy the experience of the meet up... and others who just may not be sure can get to know people first and then by the time we do go visit a club they can KNOW that they are going with a group of friends who won't let anything happen to them that they don't want. We don't end up at a swinger club at every Meet Up... but sometimes, depending on where you are at it's a good option.

Anyone can throw a Meet Up, you can do it in your own town and show people the places you like to hang out, or you can pick someplace you want to go and make the arrangements to have the Meet up there. Keep in mind that a Meet Up should consist of vanilla activities where people can get to know one another in a no pressure atmosphere. If you throw in a trip to your local swinger club just make sure that everyone who's attending is ok with that, or that (at least) you've provided enough non-swinger activities that those who don't feel they are ready for a "swinger" event can still attend and be comfortable.