Why am I being hit on by cheaters??!!!

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by Chicup

Well I think the unlikelihood of the situation, the unlikelihood of a single guy getting so pissed about it (even if I were single I'd be flattered more than pissed even if I wouldn't play with a cheater) but most importantly why post a photo of yourself with it for no apparent reason?

Its a 'see I get the lifestyle' and 'oh take a look at me to pm me' post

I believe his thread started in the Intro or Per Ads forum, I may have been the mod to move it here, but I don't recall. If Julie spots this thread she could find out where it origniated.

I will assume he is genuine, until I have other proof.


If he is new to an ad site, he is probably receiving lots of contacts...that's common when anyone joins a new site, whether you are a couple or single.

And if he is new to swinging, even if he has only had 5 contacts, 3 may be from married woman wanting to cheat. I've seen such profiles so I know they exist. How prolific they are may depend on the part of the country and the ad site.

SD mentions when he is "chatting" with women he discovers - to his disappointment - that they are looking for sex without telling their husband. In chatrooms and through IMing I imagine this "request from a cheater" could be prevelant. The woman in chat - if she even is a woman (we must all remember that some cyber rompers aren't who they say they are) - may only be living a fantasy that she would never live out.

And where does he say he has an Swing Lifestyle profile? Did I miss that?

I hope SD comes back and let's us know more about himself.

LM

[Annaiis]

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

And where does he say he has an Swing Lifestyle profile? Did I miss that?

Since I'm the only one who's mentioned Swing Lifestyle, can I assume this comment is directed at my post?

I never said he said he had a profile on Swing Lifestyle. Since he's complaining about

... getting approached by women in relationships that want to keep things from their hubbys.

, when he says he's

... very open, honest and honorable in (his) profile ...

, and that he

... (doesn't) play that way ...

, I went looking for a profile to see exactly what he DOES say in his profile, so that I might perhaps be able to suggest an explanation for why he's getting so much unwanted attention.

I found it odd that he doesn't have a profile on here or even on the Swingersboard sister "swingers personals" site, Swing Lifestyle and it made me question the sincerety of his complaint.

So shoot me :surrender

Let me try again ... SD, perhaps you're not clear in your profile that women in relationships that want to play dirty with their significant other do not interest you and that they should not waste your time or their's if that's what they're up to. If you'd be willing to let us see the profile that's attracting all the unwanted attention, perhaps we could advise you on changes you might make to reduce the contact from cheating wives.

Annaiis

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by good times

It also might be that while we have had dozens of single guys approach Mrs. GT to meet them on the sly, I have never even heard of a woman doing it to a single guy before.

I have. There are plenty of women out there looking to cheat and who better than a single guy who doesn't have any issues sleeping with another man's wife.

There was a situation this weekend at my local club where a single guy met upwith a couple. I have no idea how this came about since apparently the couple doesn't do single guys... and after an hour or so of her making otu with the guy the husband put an end to it. But it didn't end, the next day she approached the club hosts trying to get said single guy's contact info behind her hubby's back. So, yes it happens in swinging... and I'm sure there are just as many married women who aren't in swinging that are out there looking for men to cheat with - otherwise the personal ads sites that cater to that (cheating) demo wouldn't exist.

Women are by no means any better than men in these situations.

As for this thread. I didn't move it. I did consider moving it to the singles forum... which is actually where it originated...but I figured that both singles and couples deal with cheaters so it was a pretty open topic. Evidently, that is the same thought that the mods there had in moving it to General Swingers.

Now, let's try to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than assuming that everyone has an agenda. Maybe instead of questioning his motives we can have a decent conversation on the topic of cheaters (both male and female) who attempt to use swinger venues to cheat.

[Chicup]

Soon as someone explains the need for the picture I'll give benefit of the doubt

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by Chicup

Why do I think this is a personal add and not a thread?

Soon as someone explains the need for the picture I'll give benefit of the doubt.

I did some further checking and Sensual did post this thread in the Personal Ads forum - last I looked there is still a redirect in that forum which moves it to this forum. We mods have moved it because we thought it was a topic worthy of discussion. It was our decision to move it out of Personal Ads.

Personal Ads can include a picture. Since Sensual posted in the Personal Ads he chose to do so.

LM

[JustAskJulie]

I was thinking more about this thread and the thought hit me that we had discussed this before... and I was right...

wive's on the prowl

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

...we can have a decent conversation on the topic of cheaters (both male and female) who attempt to use swinger venues to cheat.

Where we live, there are a couple of large military installations very near. With the war going on and men far from home for lengthy periods of time, we've run across several "single females" with profiles who turn out to be military wives who are entertaining themselves while their hubbies are away.

Having gotten into email exchanges with some, we learn later - after 2-3 emails - that they're married and that their husbands don't know what they're up to. They are not swingers with the husband away....they're just cheating wives looking for men or a couple to entertain them.

Personally, we don't go there.

[Dooode]

Originally Posted by SensualDeviant

Sorrry about the grrr but I keep getting approached by women in relationships that want to keep things from their hubbys. I am very open, honest and honorable in my profile, but still it seems that some just don't care. I don't play that way and it's frustrating to chat and get to know a woman, only to find that she's trying to play dirty with her significant other.

Yup, I get that too. But most of the time it's from closet bi-guys who hide their orientation from their wives. I encourage them to include their wives in their fantasies and pursuits, then I drop 'em.

I don't want to be a reason a couple splits up. I've gotten caught up with married or engaged ladies before (years ago) and I never want to get put in that position of contributing to the break-up of a marriage. If they fuck it up themselves, that's their responsibility. But I refuse to be put into a position of contributing to the break-up.

[cpl2doitwithu]

We have actually been hit on by cheating couples ...five or six times in fact. By cheating couple, I mean that they are both married, but not to each other. And for us...."that dog don't hunt'

[WesternSwing]

Although the approach to this post is a little strange, from personal experience I can say that it does happen.

After I was divorced and before I met Mrs. WS I dated quite a bit for a while. Mrs. WS and one other woman were the only single women I had sex with during this time. I wasn't looking for them, but they found me. For instance, I met a Meg Ryan look-a-like at a club one night. She was out with friends. We hit it off really well and she told her friends I'd give her a ride home. Which I did. When we got there I asked to go in and she said her kids were asleep and didn't want to wake them, but then went down on me right there in the driveway. I asked for her phone number afterward and she gave it to me and told me not to call after 5 since her husband would be home. I asked where he was and she said "asleep upstairs".

Crap like that would happen. I think some might have had a open relationship, but most were just cheating. Like others have mentioned, the percentage of women cheating is almost equal to that of men. Now, I don't think they are using swingers sites to find men to cheat with though. I think it is more like my experience, picking-up guys at clubs, or coworkers, neighbors, etc.

Mr. WS

[Ou812ic]

I know this will ADD a little something to this thread..
Hell I'm LOOKING for Cheating Wives !!!!

[lickudry]

What the hell is the difference? Whether the wife or husband is there if you are not doing it with your own wife or husband you are cheating on them. So what the f****. Maybe some of us married men would like to experience some sexual freedom, fulfill fantasies that our wives won't.

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by lickudry

What the hell is the difference? Whether the wife or husband is there if you are not doing it with your own wife or husband you are cheating on them. So what the f****. Maybe some of us married men would like to experience some sexual freedom, fulfill fantasies that our wives won't.

I wouldn't say that now. Now, if I were to want to play with a woman, and Jay said "okay, but I'll be present to watch", then I don't see that as cheating at all. He is present and consentual. Cheating is going behind his back and sneaking around. So, there are situations where only 1 partner has sex, but I would not categorize that as cheating.

[SouthBond]

So you are being pursued by married women wishing to cheat on their husbands. First, make sure that your will is up-to-date. You might go ahead and purchase a burial policy. Be sure and have health insurance in case they fail to finish you off. The car following you with the camera may belong to the other husband or a private detective. The husband my solve the problem, without a fatality, by taking your scrotum, cutting a one inch slice, pushing the testicles out and snipping the cord on each little bean. Then all that you will think about, thereafter, will be getting plenty to eat. I hope that dude is not you. Of course what should take place, is for the wife to say husband, you just are not taking care of my sexual needs. Either you help me find a new playmate or I am going to find one myself. What do you plan to do? Then he runs to the swinger board and confides with TyBee and learns that the solution is to swing. Then everybody lives happy ever after and you still have your rock collection.

[Chicup]

Originally Posted by lickudry

What the hell is the difference? Whether the wife or husband is there if you are not doing it with your own wife or husband you are cheating on them. So what the f****. Maybe some of us married men would like to experience some sexual freedom, fulfill fantasies that our wives won't.

Oh these posts are fun and I'm in a foul mood so even more fun than normal.

First off, 'lickudry' is an awful name. Being licked 'dry' sounds more painful than sexy. Something more like a cats tongue.

If you can't tell the difference between going behind your wifes back and having your wife allow or arrange extramarital sex, then I can understand why you are so unhappy with your sex life that you are willing to risk your marriage just to get a piece of tail. You sir do not belong here, but perhaps you can find an equally screwed up woman at a local bar and you can cheat on your spouces together there.