More on Cheating

Originally posted by OhioCouple


Is it cheating if you are having sex with your significant other and actually fantasizing another senario in order to achieve orgasm?

Lori

This sounds like it could fit into George Orwells' novel "1984", with the thought police and all that. Just picture having finished up with some great sex and your spouse says:

".... that was great baby, but just let me hook you up to the mind reader and make sure you thinking of me!"

Scary thought, if this were to be considered cheating, I think the whole world would be guilty on this one.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by everlast
Scary thought, if this were to be considered cheating, I think the whole world would be guilty on this one.

The reason I brought this up is years ago I worked with a woman who's husband would call out different names during sex and in his sleep waking up with a rock hard "hard on". She divorced him for it. I don't recall if she was part of any particular religion, but she saw it as cheating.

Lori

[TeamSoBe]

Haha, that sucks. I could definitely see that getting pretty old if it happened a lot. Divorce though? Seems like an extreme cure for a wet dream problem.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by TeamSoBe
Haha, that sucks. I could definitely see that getting pretty old if it happened a lot. Divorce though? Seems like an extreme cure for a wet dream problem.

I remember that she would just come in to work in absolute tears. She was so bothered by it. The sad thing is, is that he was a good provider, treated her like a queen and two children suffered in this mess. They even sought counseling for it, but could not overcome her thought of it being cheating. Now granted, there could have been more to the story than I ever knew, but I am pretty good at spotting abusive people and cheaters.

I can say though that in my first marriage had my ex done those sort of things, I'd have probably been offended too, not to the point of divorce though. The physical cheating served him with the papers. Now I am more of a live and let live kind of person and as long as it isn't physical without my knowledge then, no harm, no foul --as long as our marriage remains strong in all of the other aspects of life, my husband has my consent to do anything that does not include physical cheating. He on the other hand does not really see it that way. At times he becomes agitated if I am e-mailing someone in the lifestyle and I haven't let him look at it first. It isn't like he doesn't know how to read "sent" mail. Once he reads what I have sent, he is perfectly fine with it. I am talking here about people that we both know in both physical and the over the course of time internet contact.

Ahhh, It is probably one of those male issues that I will never understand.

Lori

[sinc]

If you cant respect what your partner considers cheating even if you dont agree, then dont expect them to respect yours. A relationship of two soulmates have more enjoyment swinging together once you start doing it seperately and you cant tell your partner then its not swinging it becomes cheating. I feel swinging is when sex is shared openly as a couple in whatever way each couple chooses. If you cant share it in someway with your partner, Why cant you?
I dont know how many others feel this way but I would be upset at least at first if my partner had sex without dicussing it with me at first. If he told me afterwards I would not stay upset long but if they told me at a later time or didnt tell me I would probably have a hard time .
As I said at the start that its only swinging when youcan share it. Once you cant share it then the trust starts to go and once the trust is gone then the relationship is done.