Married Male, Wife Frigid

[YazooBud]

After many years of celibacy due to my wife's medical problems, I've decided to try and live a more robust sex life. Of course, my spouse is a major prude and if she knew about it the fecal matter would hit the fan.

Is there hope for me?

[Pepper & Drew]

Nope, probably not much hope with swinger. Most swingers don't look favorably on married males that are stepping out on their wives, since there are way too many couples who are both on board and less potential to get into a drama-laden domestic dispute if the wife finds out that you've played with her husband.

Check these threads out:
Going it alone

Good, Old Fashioned Cheating

Swinging with married m/f whose spouse does not know

[just1gurl]

have you seen that TV show-I caught it on a couple of saturday aft.'s, I think. They set-up catching cheaters on camera, with all the melodrama from the cheeated-on, alll the weeping and wailing. Busting into secret sex-hideways with the camera, a little nudity, getting everyone involved on camera (running from it usually) their 15 minutes of fame. Anyone seen that show, iis it still on?

nice way to introduce your lifestyle to your co-workers!

[BodyScape02]

Originally Posted by just1gurl

have you seen that TV show-I caught it on a couple of saturday aft.'s, I think. They set-up catching cheaters on camera, with all the melodrama from the cheeated-on, alll the weeping and wailing. Busting into secret sex-hideways with the camera, a little nudity, getting everyone involved on camera (running from it usually) their 15 minutes of fame. Anyone seen that show, iis it still on?

nice way to introduce your lifestyle to your co-workers!

OOOh, I like you... you think like I do...

And isn't it amazing that cheats ALWAYS have the same bull crap story... my wife is frigid, medical condition... to elicit PITY.

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this exact scenario,. when I was just single and not swinging. It is really beginning to tick me off.

So, yeah honey, I will talk to you… and make sure your wife knows about it too... film at eleven. We can start a new TV. Show... Setup the cheater ...

Do you want to be the first guest?

A very hissing

~CAT

[jstlkng]

Wow!!! So every guy who is married to a "frigid" wife is some kind of really bad character. Have you ever thought about the fact that a wife is cheating on her husband when she can't provide for his sexual needs and denies him the pleasure of other people? There really are some folks out there who are telling the truth. I don't believe that people should cheat on each other in any manner. But, remember, those of you who have understanding spouses get to play anytime you can make it happen. Some of us just have to do without.

[intuition897]

Originally Posted by jstlkng

Wow!!! So every guy who is married to a "frigid" wife is some kind of really bad character. Have you ever thought about the fact that a wife is cheating on her husband when she can't provide for his sexual needs and denies him the pleasure of other people? There really are some folks out there who are telling the truth. I don't believe that people should cheat on each other in any manner. But, remember, those of you who have understanding spouses get to play anytime you can make it happen. Some of us just have to do without.

Whoah. Are you serious?? What makes you think that just because we've taken the moral high road that it was EASY??? Whether or not one's spouse is receptive to the idea is beside the point. No, really it is. This isn't about what your spouse thinks of your desire to have sex with other people; it's all about what you think of your spouse. Your wife is a big girl (or at least she needs to be). Babysitting an adult is just condescending, and we refuse to do that with one another. I don't need nor want my feelings "protected" by my husband. Don't shield me from reality. And if someone will need to be institutionalized because they are made to deal with reality, then there's your problem. Keeping them in their protective little bubble of disillusion is NOT doing them any favours.

When you choose to lay it out straight with your spouse (while being sympathetic to her discomfort) it says that you are respecting her as an adult and as a human being who should be treated with dignity and without condescension. It makes it an equal partnership. If these are your actual, realistic sexual and intimate needs, and she cannot meet them...then that is a problem that needs to be dealt with, not swept under a rug. And trying to solve your problems on your own without first coming to your partner to find a solution is not the way to deal them.

[BodyScape02]

"Wow!!! So every guy who is married to a "frigid" wife is some kind of really bad character. Have you ever thought about the fact that a wife is cheating on her husband when she can't provide for his sexual needs and denies him the pleasure of other people? "

Sorry but that is not the point... the point is Cheating is Cheating.

That argument just evades the basic truth of the matter. The reason doesn't matter... it could be "any of the above", or "all of the above". The core point of the argument is that he is requesting we help him commit adultery and cheat on his wife.

If it is that intolerable...make an appointment with a marriage counselor or file for divorce.

Don't play on peoples emotions to enable you to cheat on your wife. It does a HUGE disservice to everyone involved.

You see, what you are proposing in justification for the action. There is none... it is a selfish and cowardly way to go about getting sex. Relative moralism in an area that is truly black and white (within the swing community).

People who are married here...PLAY TOGETHER , or with each others full knowledge and consent. Trust and honesty are the operative words. WE do not CHEAT ON EACH OTHER... we PLAY TOGETHER (see, I am still thinking in "we" terms!)

So mess with the semantics however you like to convince yourself you are justified in betraying someone you have made an emotional, spiritual and legal coven with... the truth is... YOU ARE NOT.

No one is. Cheating is just not something you can justify... it is only something you can ultimately choose to do or not to do and suffer the circumstances of your self indulgent choice. If you choose to cheat then you have to take responsibility for your actions and pay the price... it is called... ALIMONY.

~Cat


obviously I have a very strong opinion on this matter.

[sexyshelby]

Originally Posted by jstlkng

Have you ever thought about the fact that a wife is cheating on her husband when she can't provide for his sexual needs and denies him the pleasure of other people?

Are you serious???

I'm not married, so I guess I don't speak with much authority on the subject, but...I completely disagree with this. I know people often create their own vows, but I've never heard any that say "in sickness and in health, as long as you keep fucking me".

~SS

[VanHlebar]

Ditto to Cat and intuition.. you two beat met to it As they said if you are unhappy with your relationship, swinging.. err cheating isn't going to fix it. Either fix the problem or get out. Life is way to short to be in bad relationships.

-Van

[beaverz]

I believe this is a swinger’s forum, let me double check, yes that’s what it is. “Swinger” pretty much implies everything is out in the open within a couple’s relationship. So my guess is that the responses will normally be negative towards cheating spouses.

Spouses looking to go behind their SO’s back would have better feed back by finding sites that promotes affairs. Typing Cheaters on Google will pull up many sites.

Here are some of the sites that may be what you’re looking for:

www.letmedoyourwifebecausemineisfrigid.com
www.mywifeisfrigidandhasagunsoletsbecareful.com
www.prudewife-needtogetmynutoff.com
www.sickwife-needtogetmynutoff.com
www.prudeandsickwife-needtogetmynutoff.com
www.mymarriageisfuckedup-letmefuckupyours.com

Good luck!

[sexyshelby]

Originally Posted by beaverz

www.mymarriageisfuckedup-letmefuckupyours.com

Too funny!

[TNT]

Originally Posted by jstlkng

Wow!!! So every guy who is married to a "frigid" wife is some kind of really bad character. Have you ever thought about the fact that a wife is cheating on her husband when she can't provide for his sexual needs and denies him the pleasure of other people? There really are some folks out there who are telling the truth. I don't believe that people should cheat on each other in any manner. But, remember, those of you who have understanding spouses get to play anytime you can make it happen. Some of us just have to do without.

I'm sure you are correct but...No one is telling someone in an unhappy marriage to stay there. If you're not happy and/or having your needs met...GET THE HELL OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP.

Moaning and complaining and saying "Oh poor me, I'm so unhappy" does no one any good. Although I do know of marriages where there is cheating involved and I understand why these people stay in that relationship...It's still NOT my problem or my place to ease their suffering.

For those that cheat and expect that swingers would/should understand and help them in their endeavor is extremely naive. We've worked hard to obtain the open, honest relationship that we have...why would we or should we want to aid and abet something that we in all honesty do not approve of ?

Teresa

[Paphian]

Originally Posted by YazooBud

After many years of celibacy due to my wife's medical problems, I've decided to try and live a more robust sex life. Of course, my spouse is a major prude and if she knew about it the fecal matter would hit the fan.

Which is it... a medical problem or that she's a prude? Make up your mind. And dude, the thing that pisses off swinging folks about cheating is the lying and disrespect. Quite the opposite of what swinging is about, and why I'm betting that you'll be roasted quite thoroughly here.

Originally Posted by YazooBud

Is there hope for me?

Nope.

[Alura]

Thanks for the link, Teresa! TeeHee!

Mr. Alura

[TNT]

Originally Posted by Alura

Thanks for the link, Teresa! TeeHee!

Mr. Alura

Your welcome.


Teresa