She's moving at a different pace

[runswthscissorz]

Hi everybody. We are brand new to the lifestyle and went to our first club this past weekend. Hooked up with a couple about an hour before closing. They were an attractive couple and really nice people. I had full swap with the woman, but Vicky wasn't quite ready to jump all the way in. Sorry to be explicit, but I have to describe the situation. Vicky and the other guy only engaged in soft stuff: making out, him playing with her boobs and sucking them, played with her puss. She was giving him a hand job. Vicky and the woman played a bit too, no oral. I felt bad afterwards though because I had full enjoyment and he was kind of left out. Although I have to say that he seemed very turned on and satisfied to see me with his woman. In fact when it came time for the act, he jumped for a condom quicker than I did and when she dried up a bit, had the lube before I could even turn around. When I was finished, he climbed on and finished up with his wife. Vicky wants to participate, but seems to have to go at her own pace now in the beginning. Do more experienced couples find this frustrating? Don't want to get the reputation of us taking but not giving. I'm just so new to this and don't know how many men are satisfied with that kind of situation. Thanks for any advice or input.

Arthur

[CindyB]

I suggest you make certain your wife is willing and then just let her set the pace. Never go any faster than the slowest person.

[Spoomonkey]

Frustrating? For us, yes. But it really does depend on the couple and the situation. I love to watch Mrs Spoo have a good time and she loves to watch me - and it is not uncommon that once everyone is in the room, things don't go so well between one half of the foursome - which leaves two people watching the other.

The only time that I was on "that side" of the equation - it didn't do much for me... But, Mrs Spoo really enjoys watching more than I.

With singles we will both sit back and watch the other play: her with a single male or me with a single female. That is pretty hot, though we both end up jumping in before long.

Let your wife take her time. If it bothered the other couple, they should have said something. As long as they knew going into the room, then you're okay.

Spoomonkey

[fun4Ds]

sounds like everything is o.k. if every one had a good time. ya seem to have things well thaught and placed. eccept the frustrating part. is that frustration on your part or vickies? if its yours runswith just slow down and let things soak in. be cool you lucky devil.

[sereneiders]

Originally Posted by CindyB

I suggest you make certain your wife is willing and then just let her set the pace. Never go any faster than the slowest person.

Dito

Moreover, we all were beginers some time, we've been there, some way or another, what happens to you two is perfectly understandable.

Just ensure to be up front with your playmates about this. Let them choose to play with you, knowing in advance she may not jump in, and no one will be able to tell you're "takers but not givers".

Problems arouses when you're deceiving by hidding facts you know in advance, like the stage you're in and your peace. Just be honest about this, and this also will help you two, because you'd take off of your back a lot of pressure.

[runswthscissorz]

Thanks for the words everybody. I appreciate the feedback. It was all encouraging and makes both of us feel good. Thanks again.

[C & J Ohio]

Originally Posted by runswthscissorz

I had full swap with the woman, but Vicky wasn't quite ready to jump all the way in.

It's only full swap if you both play. Sounds like the other guy made the best of what may have been an uncomfortable situation. The main ingredient, as always, is communication. If the other couple was told that you were willing, and your wife was OK with it, but she was not ready for intercourse yet, then no problem. Otherwise, the other couple can feel they were misled.

[twohots4u2]

Don't worry about it. If the other couple were happy and you two were happy, then why knock it. We have been with other couples where the guy played with and then fucked my gal while I only played with and had oral sex with his gal. We all went home happy. I enjoy seeing my gal have a good time and I do not tell her what or when she has to do anything. We just go with the flow. If you try it you will enjoy swinging more and be concerned as you are now.

[meandher2go]

as long as its discussed previous to the date i dont see anything wrong with it. we both would be open to that type of play. we are NOT pushy and play by the rules.

its not all about the need for condoms