What Happens at a Swing Club?

What happens at a Swing Club? Well - what do you want to happen? There are so many possible answers to that question; it's almost impossible to answer in a short sentence. Some people have a mental image of some massive orgy in the middle a dance floor that anyone can just dive into - it's not. Some think that a club is a meat market filled with predatory men out to grab their wives or force people to do something they don't want to do - it's not. Some might think that simply by walking in the door, they're obligated to have sex - they're not. Describing what happens at a swing club is kind of like trying to describe what happens at any kind of social function or party - it varies. You have to understand a few facts first…

There are basically two kinds of swing clubs - off-premise clubs, and on-premise clubs. Almost all of our experience is with on-premise clubs. The overwhelming majority of swing clubs are for couples only. Most will allow a couple to bring a single female with them as a guest, but few allow single men into the club at all. I know that doesn't sound fair, but the perception is that if single men are allowed in, the club will soon be nothing but single men looking to score. I don't necessarily agree with that, but that's the perception. A lot of couples (especially soft swingers, or couples new to swinging) are concerned with men aggressively pursuing a woman in a club. To eliminate that fear, most clubs have adopted a strict 'couples only' policy. With that in mind, everything I present here will be based on the assumption that you're a couple wanting to explore a club.

Off-premise clubs normally don’t allow any kind of open sexual activity on the premises - hence the name. They're usually clubs that cater to swingers who are looking for a place to meet, socialize, and make plans to explore a bit further someplace else. They may allow a little bit of nudity; then again they may not. Laws vary form place to place, and some laws don't allow some places that serve alcohol to also allow any nudity at all. Other than that, it's much like any other nightclub or lounge. The average nightclub frowns on couples trying to hook up on their premises, however, so special clubs were developed to take care of this niche market.

On-premise clubs allow sexual activity on their premises, and some encourage it in ways best left to the imagination. Again, laws vary, and some on-premise clubs don't serve alcohol - they're BYOB establishments. Usually, sexual activity is confined to special 'party rooms' or 'playrooms,' but not always. Nudity isn't common, but it isn't rare either - that really depends on the crowd. It's not uncommon to see people topless, flashing a bit here and there, or even a bit of petting and fondling. We've even seen men and women lose a game of pool, and as a result have to strip naked and streak the entire club - much to everyone's delight, and with a lot of cheering. Basically, when it comes to nudity or sexual activity; if you have to ask, take it to the playroom just to be safe…

There are also different types of swingers. They're broken down into two main groups - soft-swap (or soft swingers) or full-swap (or hardcore swingers.) Soft swingers are the kind most people can relate to. They're couples that don't trade partners, rather, they prefer to have sex with their mates, and don't have any interest in having sex with anyone else. They're more interested in the voyeuristic/exhibitionistic aspects of swinging, and prefer to keep it that way. It's been our experience that about half of the people who go to the clubs we frequent are in this category.

Full swap swingers can take on many forms - couples looking for the elusive single bi female are considered to be a part of this category. There are literally millions of couples looking for the single bi female who don't consider themselves swingers - well, they are… They're also the most numerous single sub-group of the lot. Some couples are looking for single males, some exclusively for other couples. The possible combinations are literally countless.

The average playroom is pretty basic - lots of sofas, loveseats, and ottomans for you to play on, or watch others play from. Some have mattresses, and huge pit-like sofas, while others will go so far as to provide a sex swing or Jacuzzi or two. Every club is different, so there's no real answer to what they're like. Every club tries to set its own mood. Some clubs have 1 playroom, and some have several - to include so-called 'private rooms.' Just a pointer here - if you see a private room with a door closed, leave it closed and move on.

What happens in the playroom? Well, nothing illegal. Other than that, basically anything you can think of. We've seen everything from one-on-one oral sex to 4-couple orgies. We've seen a woman blindfolded and put into a sex swing, then basically turned out to the crowd. If you can think of a possible combination, we've seen it. The only rule is everyone has to be agreeable to whatever it is that's happening, or may happen. See Rule #1 below. I have to stop here for a second and mention sex between men. Relatively speaking, that's not something that's seen much in the lifestyle, and we've never seen it in a swing club. That's not to say it doesn't happen, just that we've never seen it. I'm sure there are just as many bi men as there are bi women. Usually, however, that's kept behind closed doors, or in clubs that cater to that lifestyle. I'm not saying that it's seen as unacceptable, or a bad thing, I'm just saying that bi men tend to keep that behind closed doors, seeking to meet other bi men, or couples with bi men, through other means. I'll also say point blank that being naked in the same room with another naked man doesn't make you gay! That's junior high school talking. It had to be said…

I'll also take this time to tell you that safe sex is an absolute must. Some clubs do provide condoms, but some don't. Ultimately, it's up to you to protect yourself. We only have one body, so we have to take care of it. Do bring your own protection - just in case.

Some on-premise clubs are run from a commercial building, and some are operated out of the owner's private home. This last category of club has become more popular recently, as it's thought that the owners of the home present a safer, cleaner environment. I don't know how true that is, but that's the perception. A majority of clubs will require you to become a member. There's usually a fee involved with become a member, (usually about $40, which also covers that night's admission) and there's usually an admission fee to get into the club on subsequent evenings. With some clubs, that admission includes appetizers and an open bar, although some clubs are moving away from that to keep out the people who see that as '$40 - all you can drink!' and have no interest at all in swinging.

Almost all clubs have special events designed to get the crowd circulating and socializing. These events run the gamut from 'Naughty Nightie' parties to Mardi Gras parties, New Year's parties, Lingerie parties… the list is almost endless. Some of these parties, the New Year's parties especially, can have a higher admission fee, based on the event's popularity, and what the club is providing in addition to what's normally provided. Most clubs have a website that will have a calendar of events that will explain the event and any additional admission fees.

That leads me to another common question; "How should we dress?" Special events not withstanding, think casual-sexy. I'll address the men first, because that's always easier. Most clubs don't really have a dress code, but don't like to allow shirts with no collars - meaning T-shirts. A nice pair of slacks or jeans is fine, and a button up shirt or golf shirt is acceptable. Think casual, and you'll be fine. I've yet to see anyone in a suit and tie, although I have seen a kilt or two - talk about an ice breaker. Some men wear shorts in the summertime, and that's ok too. For the women, it's a bit more difficult to explain. We've seen everything from blue jeans and a western shirt to a fishnet body stocking, with nothing else. The club likes to try to provide a sexy atmosphere, and encourage both sexes to dress sexily. Your 'little black dress' would be very welcome, but if you should decide to turn it up a bit and be more daring, lingerie is always welcome at an on-premise club. If you're a bit more reserved, a skirt and nice blouse is perfectly acceptable as well. It's really your call.

The main socializing area of most clubs look like any other bar, lounge, or nightclub, and are operated in the same manner. Some, in fact, are normal lounges or nightclubs during the week, but they close their doors on weekends for 'private, couple's only parties.' There's usually music of some kind, a dance floor, and possibly pool tables or other such games. There are lots of places to sit and socialize, and some clubs have special activities or events to break the ice and get people circulating. There is a definite party atmosphere most of the time, depending on the crowd.