a question for the bisexual women

[arvcpl]

I have a question that I have been wondering about for some time but not sure how to actually put it into words so you may have to read between the lines a little bit.

this question is directed towards couples with bisexual females and more specifically to the bisexual wives themselves. so here it goes, when you are either looking at profiles online or checking out couples at a party or a club and you see a female half that you are attracted to but aren't all that attracted to the male half, what do you do and how do you handle that situation?

Do you still flirt her up and interact with her and just be upfront that you aren't interested in him? Or do you try to get her alone? Or do you reject the couple if he isn't up to your interests?

Do you ask to just be able to play with her and ask him to sit in the corner?

Do you ever play along with the male half just to get to the female half? (I've heard that refered to as "throwing the man a bone."

I'm just kind of interested in that and want to here how people deal with that situation.

[aklovers]

Well, we definitely look at the couple as a whole. We as a rule, do not "Take one for the team". We would turn them down as a couple, not only ask to play with her. We only play together, we wouldn't want someone to ask us to play seperately.

[BiloxiCouple]

Kind of rude to say I want to fuck your wife and I don't want to fuck you.

All parties involved should be able to play. If they can't or don't want to, then no one should be able to play.

Then again, everyone is different and will see things differently.

For us, it is both of us or nothing.

[twohots4u2]

We agree that it is either both of us or not at all. We swing as a couple because it stiumlates our relationship, not to get our individual rocks off.

[slevin]

For us it is both or nothing. Either we both play or neither of us do, because of that if we see a couple we either approach them with the intention of playing with the couple or we don't approach them at all. We would never approach a couple and say that we only wanted to play with one of them. Anyone who approached us saying they only wanted to play with one of us, or one of us could only watch, would be politely turned down.

I know that we have played with one couple where they were throwing me a bone. They wanted Katrina and took me along to get her into bed. I definitely didn't feel left out of what was going on (that would have caused me to end things right there), but after playing with them a few times they came clean that they really only wanted to see Katrina. In fact they really just wanted the two girls to get together by themselves. I was mightily offended by that, not because she didn't want me (though that did bruise the ego a bit), but rather because they knew that we only played as a couple yet approached her about meeting on her own. Thankfully Katrina and I are open so she told me right away and we haven't seen, nor spoken to, them since.

For us, we will never throw the guy a bone just to get with his girlfriend/wife. If she is attractive I think that how attracted Katrina is to the guy might be a little bit looser than if he was on his own, but she is never going to play with a guy she isn't attracted to at all. Does that make sense? Not sure I'm explaining that correctly.

[JustAskJulie]

In general, if the male is not up to par then we will take a pass on both of them. However, I can think of one case where the female was enough to make me almost willing to take one for the team in the case of the guy. He had one physical quality that I didn't care for and I made every effort to get past that becuase of how attracted both my Pet and I were to his wife. Unfortunately, the more I talked to him the more developed other personality qualities that overrruled any desire I had for his wife.

As far as the idea of asking the wife to play alone... I wouldn't do it because I wouldn't want someone to do that to us (leave the guy out). However, if it's obvious that they are into just the girls playing while the guys watch, we might go that route and then just play with each other. The few times where we have played that way, however, I would have been perfectly happy to involve the other husband as well if they both played.

[screaminggood]

I/We have done what the rest of y'all haven't. We've had a few times where I (fem) and/or we have only played with the wife while the hubby watched. Usually it's where the fems are dancing together and the other woman tells me that her hubby just watches. We either go for a fem only experience with both hubbies watching or she'll say it's okay for my hubby to join in.

We have had one experience that was a little different...and I purposely left the other hubby out, because he wasn't planned to be included in the first place. The girl was coming on to me, the fem, and I was game. She said her hubby had already had someone else earlier....he did no talking, no dancing, etc. Then she was coming on to me and my hubby---so we went into the playroom, and in the middle of things she announced that her hubby was going to be involved---I just ignored him and he got the hint. Yes, I did it on purpose but only because she was changing the terms while sitting on top of my hubby; a little too late to take a pass! But I wasn't about to do him either!

[LFM2]

Originally Posted by arvcpl

when you are either looking at profiles online or checking out couples at a party or a club and you see a female half that you are attracted to but aren't all that attracted to the male half, what do you do and how do you handle that situation?

I have to admit that I don't do the hunting in our swinging life. Dave does all the hunting, emailing, searching, etc. At parties, we pretty much know everyone that's going to be there. We haven't met anyone new at a party in a long time. When we meet a new couple for dinner from an online ad, we have come across a couple where one of us was not attracted to the other. I guess if both of don't agree on both of them, nothing is going to happen.

Do you still flirt her up and interact with her and just be upfront that you aren't interested in him? Or do you try to get her alone? Or do you reject the couple if he isn't up to your interests?

Reject the couple as a whole. There are times when we might not find him physically appealing, but he might have a super personality, which makes up for his looks. Then the flirt is on. We would never tell a couple that we wouldn't play with them because he isn't good looking enough or that we'd only like to play with her.

Do you ask to just be able to play with her and ask him to sit in the corner?

Nope. It could be too offending if we did that. Although, if the tables were turned and someone requested that same question of us, the one that they were interested would still play while the other watched. It's one of my "turn on" fantasies just to watch Dave play with someone. Like an out of body experience for me.

Do you ever play along with the male half just to get to the female half? (I've heard that refered to as "throwing the man a bone."

Nope, never have. Never will.

[Willing29]

We agree with most of the above posts, that we play as a couple and everyone plays or no one plays. We actually just changed out Swing Lifestyle profile to say exactly that same statment.

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by arvcpl

Do you ever play along with the male half just to get to the female half? (I've heard that refered to as "throwing the man a bone."

I don't fully qualify as a bisexual woman, but I want to post anyway. I will engage in light play with women, but my first priority is playing with men so that's where my sight is focused. F/F play isn't what my husband and I seek when swinging, it's just a bonus.

I don't think couples with bifems who do all the things you mention are going to post and admit it. But I think there are plenty of couples out there who do these things when they're not that interested in the husband, in order to get a bifemale. Her husband may be okay - as in tolerable - and they are willing to have him involved in play but may limit the play with him, or the other woman may nearly ignore him once the play begins and focus her attention on the other woman and her own husband.

Single bifems are limited, but there are lots of bifems who are part of a couple and I think some couples will throw a man a bone to get the bifems they are after.

LM

[polo_10]

We always look at potential's as a couple, even if she is more attracted to the female half. We have "thrown a dog a bone" and I am sure that I have been thrown a bone also at some point in time, But there is a set standard that we look for in looks and we don't expect "Barbie and Ken"... but WPTH and fit firm bodies is half the battle the rest is facial features and personalities.

[pervgeeks]

Originally Posted by arvcpl

I have a question that I have been wondering about for some time but not sure how to actually put it into words so you may have to read between the lines a little bit.

this question is directed towards couples with bisexual females and more specifically to the bisexual wives themselves. so here it goes, when you are either looking at profiles online or checking out couples at a party or a club and you see a female half that you are attracted to but aren't all that attracted to the male half, what do you do and how do you handle that situation?

Do you still flirt her up and interact with her and just be upfront that you aren't interested in him? Or do you try to get her alone? Or do you reject the couple if he isn't up to your interests?

Do you ask to just be able to play with her and ask him to sit in the corner?

Do you ever play along with the male half just to get to the female half? (I've heard that refered to as "throwing the man a bone."

I'm just kind of interested in that and want to here how people deal with that situation.

As a bisexual female, I have to be attracted to BOTH. I'm bi, not a lesbian. I LOVE men!

I love to please women, but I'm better at flirting with men (probably just out of having more experience). I like to flirt men up and then tell him how hot I think his wife is.

Never would I ask a man to sit in the corner and anyone who did that to mine would be done. We're a team!

I wouldn't play with a man to get to a woman. I have to be attracted to both, my husband has be attracted to her (and essentially feel the other guy is respectful of me). We're not desperate. We don't need to give or receive mercy fucks from anyone. We're here to have fun together!

[TravlParty]

It really depends on the mood of the night. If a couple approached us and she stated that he couldn't play, then I would play with just her. The husbands can watch.

In most cases, it's all or none.

Hubby can tell if the lady isn't really into him, and he has no problem with FF play. There would be no interaction with the other male.