What do you say, to the Bi Guy ?

**fun4Ds** · 11-07-2008, 08:39 PM

I thought I would start this thread because of so much going on about the subject. Like, if you meet a couple from a different venue. Like a club or meet and greet. Some where, you didn't see on their profile the male is Bi.

Then you find out face to face the male half of a couple is bisexual.

What happens ? You know, the talking.... or turning down...

Anyone have this happen ?

I don't see allot of how people handle this situation. What they have done or not done. Would do, or should do.....

What about the Bi men, do you keep it quiet ?

How or when, would you offer this fact ?

If so, how did things turn out ?

Vjklander · 11-07-2008, 10:25 PM

We will play with bi guys, but only the MF part.

Menage_a_Trois · 11-07-2008, 11:01 PM

Well for us I'm usually the one to quickly point out that we're not interested in bi men or couples with bi-men. For us it's really something that holds no interest for me or him. He is 110% straight and I'm a 1000% wigged out by even the thought of seeing that.

I don't have any problem with someone making that personally choice to be a bi-male - it's a personal choice! I however don't care to to watch it as it would be a huge turn off for me/us. We are in this lifestyle for excitement & sexual stimulation........not to doing something that will/would demenish it! lol

Just our two cents................

**fun4Ds** · 11-08-2008, 06:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vjklander

We will play with bi guys, but only the MF part.

So, do you make it a point to discuss this, with couples you meet, that you don't know ?. Do you bring it up ?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Menage_a_Trois

Well for us I'm usually the one to quickly point out that we're not interested in bi men or couples with bi-men. For us it's really something that holds no interest for me or him. He is 110% straight and I'm a 1000% wigged out by even the thought of seeing that.

I don't have any problem with someone making that personally choice to be a bi-male - it's a personal choice! I however don't care to to watch it as it would be a huge turn off for me/us. We are in this lifestyle for excitement & sexual stimulation........not to doing something that will/would demenish it! lol

Just our two cents................

I understand exactly how you feel. But again, how does it go when you find out this fact from a couple you are interested in. Do you just say "bi bi, we are not interested now"...and walk away ?

Does it make Bi males/ couples wish they hadn't said anything ?

It just seems that if its becoming more popular. The conversation comes up more often, and should be handled/ dealt with.

TravlParty · 11-08-2008, 07:37 AM

So, we're in this bar with several couples. While talking to one couple, we ask what their preferences are. This is always a topic we bring up, wanting no surprises in the bedroom. We let it be known that while she's bi, he's not.

It's just easier to state up front.

socolais · 11-08-2008, 11:17 AM

We had a fun time with a couple we met at a house party. The next day, we read their profile and discovered that he was bi - not a big deal. He and I didn't interact even though all four of us were busy on the same bed.

I don't understand the bi-male phobia - any one "no" is as good as any other and if it's not respected THEN it's time to stop the play.

Edison Carter · 11-08-2008, 11:53 AM

Susan here-- This is just my experience and is 'deep down' while I don't play knowingly with bisexual men. I've only known two men in the Lifestyle who were bisexual. I never had sex with them, just knew them as acquaintances. However, they both died of AIDS. Interestingly enough, their wives did not contract the disease. I have no idea what this means statistically for disease, etc. I just know that I'd just rather avoid a statistical reality.

Please don't send me all the stats on AIDs, transfer rates, group dynamics, etc. I know some of my concern is based on fear, but some times a bit of fear is a good thing.

As far as how we handle it, we just say,"Bi-guys are not part of our Play," but it's only been a subject with one couple. Again, it's never personal. The occasional rejection, for a variety of reasons, is expected in the Lifestyle and should never be a concern.

GerdOEvert · 11-08-2008, 02:45 PM

I found that bi intereaction was in closed rooms, and it was just something
that happened. It was enjoyable.

The only one interaction was a guy who called later and wanted to meet away from the club. We were not interested.

We partied at Jerry's and Terry's once, and he is bi, and we explored that.
I still wish I could have made him cumm. I wanted to taste cumm, and never have.

There does not seem to be discussion of bi sexuality for the males at clubs in my experience, but perhaps quiet signals. It seems that bi women are a much bigger group of the swing scene than bi men. I am glad, bi women are a lot more sensual and sexual.

Otto and Eileen

Menage_a_Trois · 11-09-2008, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I understand exactly how you feel. But again, how does it go when you find out this fact from a couple you are interested in. Do you just say "bi bi, we are not interested now"...and walk away ?

Does it make Bi males/ couples wish they hadn't said anything ?

It just seems that if its becoming more popular. The conversation comes up more often, and should be handled/ dealt with.

Well I would politely let the couple know our feelings on this and tell them it's nothing personal against them but we are out to meet other couples of "like" mind/desires.......... then we would excuse ourselves to continue to mix and mingle. We would make sure to always say hello etc if we run into them again but we wouldn't make it a priority to seek them out etc. We go to the club to meet couples and to play.

As for their wishing they had kept quiet...........I can not answer that.

Chicup · 11-09-2008, 08:31 PM

Well if the guy mentions being bi Mrs. Chicups interest in him is now nil so its just not going to happen.

We haven't had it come up so I can't say how I would deal with it, but we would figure a way out of it.

celtic239 · 11-09-2008, 09:41 PM

A polite "Not interested" comes to mind

crazi429 · 11-10-2008, 12:09 AM

Thats a Hard one I am not interested in a bi relationship with another male but I also am not totally repulsed by it. To receive I would not have a problem. It would have to be the right conditions. Red had a previous experience where her man sucked off another man though one of the hole in the wall things and she really liked it. So we will just have to say we will see what happens when and if it ever happens. But we are not currently looking for a Bi male occurrence.

**fun4Ds** · 11-10-2008, 12:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vjklander

We will play with bi guys, but only the MF part.

Not to be picking on you Vjklander.

But how does this conversation usually get started ?

Have you been approached by a bi male ?

Do bi males just assume, and come on to you ?

Have you approached a supposedly straight male, to find out ?

**TNT** · 11-15-2008, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I thought I would start this thread because of so much going on about the subject. Like, if you meet a couple from a different venue. Like a club or meet and greet. Some where, you didn't see on their profile the male is Bi.

Then you find out face to face the male half of a couple is bisexual.

What happens ?

Same thing that happens when we meet any couple/single. We talk, if we feel we're compatible and that we would enjoy playing, we play.

Teresa

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11-07-2008, 08:39 PM	#1 (permalink)
fun4Ds Julie's Helper Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 6,487 Location: Behind door #2 Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:mrmrsfun	What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? I thought I would start this thread because of so much going on about the subject. Like, if you meet a couple from a different venue. Like a club or meet and greet. Some where, you didn't see on their profile the male is Bi. Then you find out face to face the male half of a couple is bisexual. What happens ? You know, the talking.... or turning down... Anyone have this happen ? I don't see allot of how people handle this situation. What they have done or not done. Would do, or should do..... What about the Bi men, do you keep it quiet ? How or when, would you offer this fact ? If so, how did things turn out ?

11-07-2008, 10:25 PM	#2 (permalink)
Vjklander Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 834 Location: VA Status: Couple, Straight M, BiFem Swing Lifestyle Name:Vjklander	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? We will play with bi guys, but only the MF part.

11-07-2008, 11:01 PM	#3 (permalink)
Menage_a_Trois Sex is emotion in motion! Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 576 Location: Reno, NV Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:Menage_a_Trois	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? Well for us I'm usually the one to quickly point out that we're not interested in bi men or couples with bi-men. For us it's really something that holds no interest for me or him. He is 110% straight and I'm a 1000% wigged out by even the thought of seeing that. I don't have any problem with someone making that personally choice to be a bi-male - it's a personal choice! I however don't care to to watch it as it would be a huge turn off for me/us. We are in this lifestyle for excitement & sexual stimulation........not to doing something that will/would demenish it! lol Just our two cents................
	__________________ Pam & Tom aka The Menage's

11-08-2008, 07:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
TravlParty Where's the party? Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 172 Location: Paradise Status: Couple	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? So, we're in this bar with several couples. While talking to one couple, we ask what their preferences are. This is always a topic we bring up, wanting no surprises in the bedroom. We let it be known that while she's bi, he's not. It's just easier to state up front.

11-08-2008, 11:17 AM	#6 (permalink)
socolais nothin special Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 1,251 Location: Dallas Status: M. Male - half of a novice swinging couple Swing Lifestyle Name:Bruce_Melissa	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? We had a fun time with a couple we met at a house party. The next day, we read their profile and discovered that he was bi - not a big deal. He and I didn't interact even though all four of us were busy on the same bed. I don't understand the bi-male phobia - any one "no" is as good as any other and if it's not respected THEN it's time to stop the play.
	__________________ I like her because she smiles at me and means it

11-08-2008, 11:53 AM	#7 (permalink)
Edison Carter Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 733 Location: Naperville, Il Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:EdisonCarter	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? Susan here-- This is just my experience and is 'deep down' while I don't play knowingly with bisexual men. I've only known two men in the Lifestyle who were bisexual. I never had sex with them, just knew them as acquaintances. However, they both died of AIDS. Interestingly enough, their wives did not contract the disease. I have no idea what this means statistically for disease, etc. I just know that I'd just rather avoid a statistical reality. Please don't send me all the stats on AIDs, transfer rates, group dynamics, etc. I know some of my concern is based on fear, but some times a bit of fear is a good thing. As far as how we handle it, we just say,"Bi-guys are not part of our Play," but it's only been a subject with one couple. Again, it's never personal. The occasional rejection, for a variety of reasons, is expected in the Lifestyle and should never be a concern.

11-08-2008, 02:45 PM	#8 (permalink)
GerdOEvert Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 235 Location: Walla Walla, WA	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? I found that bi intereaction was in closed rooms, and it was just something that happened. It was enjoyable. The only one interaction was a guy who called later and wanted to meet away from the club. We were not interested. We partied at Jerry's and Terry's once, and he is bi, and we explored that. I still wish I could have made him cumm. I wanted to taste cumm, and never have. There does not seem to be discussion of bi sexuality for the males at clubs in my experience, but perhaps quiet signals. It seems that bi women are a much bigger group of the swing scene than bi men. I am glad, bi women are a lot more sensual and sexual. Otto and Eileen

11-09-2008, 08:31 PM	#10 (permalink)
Chicup Not a potential *** Join Date: Nov 2001 Posts: 4,093 Location: Under the bed Status: Tired	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? Well if the guy mentions being bi Mrs. Chicups interest in him is now nil so its just not going to happen. We haven't had it come up so I can't say how I would deal with it, but we would figure a way out of it.

11-09-2008, 09:41 PM	#11 (permalink)
celtic239 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 503 Location: new york	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? A polite "Not interested" comes to mind

11-10-2008, 12:09 AM	#12 (permalink)
crazi429 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 104 Location: Brookville Ohio Status: single male with a lady friend Swing Lifestyle Name:crazi429	Re: What do you say, to the Bi Guy ? Thats a Hard one I am not interested in a bi relationship with another male but I also am not totally repulsed by it. To receive I would not have a problem. It would have to be the right conditions. Red had a previous experience where her man sucked off another man though one of the hole in the wall things and she really liked it. So we will just have to say we will see what happens when and if it ever happens. But we are not currently looking for a Bi male occurrence.

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