I finally got to try mm bj with my girlfriend watching

[tscpl]

We also think that some issues relating to male bisexuality and practices around that appear to provoke a spate of denial not to say homophobic anxiety.Another issue which is certain to provoke a large degree of denial and heat on this Board is the issue of interracial sex etc.Perhaps we ought to let everyone express their thoughts and maybe try harder to be less judgmental.Thats our 2cents worth!

[tjomc]

I only want to say that unlike some of the points made i do understand that we as men do communicate a little different than women.

I understand all points and didn't take it that anyone was attacking anyone else.
I did read in a couple post about hitting on someone who doesn't feel the same ie. bi-women on straight women and bi-men on straight men.

I am a Straight male who in fact doesn't get upset in the least if i'm hit on by a bi-male or a gay male, and wouldn't understand why anyone male or female would get upset, I myself am flattered makes me feel good, makes MrsT feel good that her husband is attractive. I've listened to "straight" men respond to these advances as "Do I Look Gay" to which i wish someone would say does the guy hitting on you look gay? or even better "Yes you do" why else would i hit on you..

To each their own

[WesternSwing]

Can't we just get rid of all the categories and just have one? Sexual. You're straight. You're bi. You're gay. In reality it is all just different ways of being sexual. Doesn't mean you have to participate in it all, just means we get rid of all the labels. Won't happen, but damn the world would be a nicer place for it.

Here's to wishing.

Mr. WS

[lovinher]

Originally Posted by tscpl

We also think that some issues relating to male bisexuality and practices around that appear to provoke a spate of denial not to say homophobic anxiety.Another issue which is certain to provoke a large degree of denial and heat on this Board is the issue of interracial sex etc.Perhaps we ought to let everyone express their thoughts and maybe try harder to be less judgmental.Thats our 2cents worth!

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by tjomc

"Yes you do" why else would i hit on you..

That's pretty funny.

I've been hit on by gay men and it never bothered me at all. I simply introduce them to my wife and they get flustered and apologize (no need to, but they always do). Of course, I'm naive enough to think I'm just having a "locker room type" conversation until they become fairly blunt about what they are interested in.

Spoomonkey

[Chicup]

Originally Posted by WesternSwing

Can't we just get rid of all the categories and just have one? Sexual. You're straight. You're bi. You're gay. In reality it is all just different ways of being sexual. Doesn't mean you have to participate in it all, just means we get rid of all the labels. Won't happen, but damn the world would be a nicer place for it.

Here's to wishing.

Mr. WS

Pedophile, necrophile, and zoophile too?

We are all sexual beings but lets be real here, communication is about as much information in as little effort as possible.

Saying you are sexual is meaningless unless the question is to separate the sexual from the asexual.

Man:Hey would you like to go see a movie?
Woman: Sure but only platonic ok?
Man: Oh come on give me a chance?
Woman: No I'm sexual.
Man: Thats what I like to hear!
Woman: No I'm sexual, but sexual only with other women.
Man: Oh sorry I didn't know you were a lesbian, can we still do that movie?
Woman: Don't you label me!

So no it won't ever happen but because it happening would be silly. Labels are fine, its what the perception behind those labels are that could be a problem.

[WesternSwing]

Originally Posted by Chicup

Pedophile, necrophile, and zoophile too?

Why is it that this is the first place people head in any argument about sexual tolerance?

We are all sexual beings but lets be real here, communication is about as much information in as little effort as possible.

Saying you are sexual is meaningless unless the question is to separate the sexual from the asexual.

Man:Hey would you like to go see a movie?
Woman: Sure but only platonic ok?
Man: Oh come on give me a chance?
Woman: No I'm sexual.
Man: Thats what I like to hear!
Woman: No I'm sexual, but sexual only with other women.
Man: Oh sorry I didn't know you were a lesbian, can we still do that movie?
Woman: Don't you label me!

So, why can't she just say "Sorry, I'm in to women."?

So no it won't ever happen but because it happening would be silly. Labels are fine, its what the perception behind those labels are that could be a problem.

I don't see it as silly. I see labels as something one person does to another person to compartmentalize them and judge them based on their own fears and insecurities. Humans have an innate need to feel superior to others. To feel good about themselves they have to make someone else bad. Eliminating labels would be a giant step towards this. Unfortunately it will never happen for the reason I just outlined. For that reason changing the perception behind them will never happen, either. For instance, we may make headway as gays become more accepted by more of society as each generation passes, but will there ever be a time someone doesn't hate them? No. All I can do is change my little part of the world.

Mr. WS

[crazycatz]

Well said Western Swing!

[lovinher]

Originally Posted by westernswing

I don't see it as silly. I see labels as something one person does to another person to compartmentalize them and judge them based on their own fears and insecurities. Humans have an innate need to feel superior to others. To feel good about themselves they have to make someone else bad. Eliminating labels would be a giant step towards this. Unfortunately it will never happen for the reason I just outlined. For that reason changing the perception behind them will never happen, either. For instance, we may make headway as gays become more accepted by more of society as each generation passes, but will there ever be a time someone doesn't hate them? No. All I can do is change my little part of the world.

Sorry WS, but I don't agree at all.

Every person you ever met you label instantly. It's how we function. It's how we remember things and people. Within a second or two of looking at a person your mind labels that person in some fashion. You can bet that person has labeled you within a few seconds of seeing you. We as humans do this without even realizing it. We have evolved that way as a survival tactic and cannot control it. It's not about superiority, it's about deciphering in your mind wether or not that person is a threat or friend. I read an article a few years back in Scientific American (I think) that touched on this very subject.
In my own opinion this doesn't mean that all labels are bad. If you see a person who is extremely obese, what is the first thing that pops into your head? Fat, large, big or whatever nice name we might say in public. If you see an extremely beautiful woman what is the first thing that pops into your head? I'm sure there are some of you who are thinking right now...well I don't do that! Riiiiiight.

I'm not sure how this turned into a discussion about hating gays. This whole thread had morphed into something way beyond what was posted by the OP and most of the replies and nobody said anything even remotely close to bashing gays or bi's. If a guy likes sucking cock? So what? I call him bi. That doesn't mean I hate him or think negatively about him. If he's buddy I might bust his balls about it though too. That's what guys do and it will never change....I hope.
We all know women don't do this.

[crazycatz]

Originally Posted by lovinher

If he's buddy I might bust his balls about it though too. That's what guys do and it will never change....

Things must be quite different here in Ireland...your mates would never 'bust your balls' for your sexuality....I think that's completely unacceptable, even if it is in jest....it means you see it as an issue on some level.

And as for labels...just because we have them why is it correct to maintain them? What purpose does it serve to call someone fat? bi? The only purpose it serves, IMO, is to 'other' them. The big purpose of labels is to help us discriminate.

Sexuality is not something that can be compartmentalised into watertight compartments of bi, gay or straight...there are a multitiude of options.
And does it not matter at all how the person themselves choses to identify?
I would like to think it does.

[lovinher]

So I if jokingly tell my bi buddy a guy is checking him out I'm a bad guy? Sorry, but that's how me and my friends are with each other and I could care less as to what somebody else thinks is unacceptable.

Originally Posted by crazycatz

And as for labels...just because we have them why is it correct to maintain them? What purpose does it serve to call someone fat? bi? The only purpose it serves, IMO, is to 'other' them. The big purpose of labels is to help us discriminate.

In another thread you yourself labeled you as a single BI-fem. Nothing wrong with that. Who are you discriminating then? I see your point, just don't agree.

Originally Posted by crazycatz

Sexuality is not something that can be compartmentalised into watertight compartments of bi, gay or straight...there are a multitiude of options.

IMO-yes it is and has it's purpose. What are the multitude of options?

[crazycatz]

To say "I might bust his balls about it though too" implies that your piss take would consist of more than just saying a guy is checking him out, IMO.

And yes, I do label myself...thats my whole point...that it is up to the individual.

[WesternSwing]

Originally Posted by lovinher

Sorry WS, but I don't agree at all.

Every person you ever met you label instantly. It's how we function.

True, and I'm not saying we don't. I'm just saying it's silly and in the end, unneeded.

Mr. WS

[lovinher]

You cannot label yourself and expect others not to. If you label yourself as "bi", what then do you yourself call another woman who likes women and men? My guess is "bi". Just trying to make a point.
Crazycatz, I'm not picking on you personally. I call this a discussion with different views.
I do not mean to offend you in any way and I hope I haven't. Without different views there would not be a Swingers Board.

[Liutas]

What's a "pharanas"?