Bisexuality in Swinging

[SharperEdge69]

Granted I'm a single male but I have noticed somethings in swinging. One being the apparent acceptance of bi women and shunning of bi-men. No I am not bi but I met one couple in that the woman enjoyed seeing her hubby give a man a blowjob. Before and after we met I was adamant about not doing it and they were cool as it was not paramount for her nor him as it was not his favorite thing to do either but he did it cause he loved his wife.

Anyway, this whole oral sex from a male has reared its head again and I don't want to and again its not required. My question is, how many of the swinging couples in here engage in bisexual activity? Do you enjoy it?

[Stratecpl]

We DON'T and AIN't Gonna either!

[danc694u]

We ain't goin there either.

[TNT]

Well, should the opportunity ever present itself I personally see no reason why not. This lifestyle is suppose to be about openess in ones own sexuality, but unfortunately there are a lot of closed minded people. It seems that it is quite acceptable for the female to be bi, but not for the man. Why it is this way is a mystery to me. I see nothing wrong with bisexuality in either men or women. Luckily I have a husband who feels the same way. If it feels good and does not hurt anyone in the process than it should be alright to do. I do not belive that the scare of anal penetration being a higher risk for HIV/AIDS, is the only reason that men shy away from this, after all, they love having anal sex with females. Is it the thought that having sex with another man might somehow diminish the mans masculinity? If thats true, then wouldn't a woman having sex with another woman diminish her feminity? All I know is that my husband and I can be with another couple who are both straight, and have no problem with it. But, if we should ever find another bi-couple, WOW ! Just think of the endless numbers of positions.

Well, just my two cents worth.

Teresa

[CanadianCouple]

Make that three of us.

[LIZA]

where do you live, TNT??

[JustAskJulie]

I would love to see two guys together... but I know it will never happen with my hubby. He doesn't even really go for anal sex with me (or other females), and has a complete aversion to the idea of being with another guy...although luckily he has no aversions to me being with other guys...lol

Funny thing is.. he is also atypical of most guys in that he could care less about seeing me with other woman and would prefer to see me with other guys.. if two women are involved he wants to be in the middle of it, not watching.

Julie http://www.swingersboard.com

[Flori_DAMAN]

Having placed many adds for single men and screened them so many times let me share this. We always look for single guys that would indulge in oral bi activity because it turns on tammy and I kind of enjoy it occasionally also. Now the point. I would say that after the majority of the men see how attractive my wife is all of a sudden they seem to be bi-orally curious. I dont mean a small percentage but a huge one. Practically all of them would consider it because my wife is very attractive. So what is the point?
I beleive that many men are JUST as bi curious and orally bi as I am. However they have made a life long tribute of not even acknowledging it to anyone else including there partner. They think it is a weekness. I have even noticed that men that were once friendly to me and had great conversations with me all of a sudden back off of me on a friendship level because I am pretty much open about my feelings and they cant handle it. So they choose to avoid what could be a great friendship because of there own insecurities.
I would never try to talk a guy into having oral sex with me and I have never done it without my wife present except for a couple of experimental things when i was a young man before marraige. I actually carried a good amount of guilt about it also.

The fact is that I do not have fantasies about my wife being with another female and she doesnt get off on the idea eigher although she has tried it and had some pleasure during it. Its just not a thing.

Many men are tripping over there tongue to hurry and tell everyone that listens how they would never do it and have no fantasies about it but a lot of them do inside.

Many females have the fantasy of seeing there man engage in this though and the lack of commuication that they propogate is lost in this subject. Some are in denial. While haveing sex with other partners is so acceptable with the opposite sex MM cntact is still taboo. I told the people at the club that we freqent about my bi feelings and was met with a friendly cold shoulder and could not care less.

Anal sex is repulsive to me but if the question were asked i would never jump in and say NOT ME NOT ME..........that would be a bit of an overeaction with the ole shakesphere saying of "my doth protest too much my dear" or something like that.

Ah well as swinging evolutionizes more and more people will be less defensive and less vocal about how they arent "that way" because most people really don't care if you are or aren't. All I know is that my lover gets off on it like a lot of men get off on watching there gal with another gal.....and I try to please my gal in any way possible.

If she wanted me to try anal sex with a guy I would definitely draw the line though......but not because im afraid of it being a reflection on my personality but because I just happen to find it non pleasurable in my mind so i would be non pleasurable to do it....

But i wouldnt jump on and say Not this guy!!! as if it meant im better than people that get off on it.

Swinging is an expression of tolerance and I find it so odd that sublimely I have been shunned because of my feelings.........Johns two cents.

[Stratecpl]

Originally posted by JustAskJulie:


he is also atypical of most guys in that he could care less about seeing me with other woman

Julie http://www.swingersboard.com

Ron is like that too...in fact he's very turned OFF at the sight of two women messing around.... We know a few other men that don't like it. Interesting too...some of them will claim to enjoy it because they are afraid to admit they don't in front of other men. Ron's had guys tell him he ain't "normal" if he don't like to see two women together... Ron is like me though and has no curiosity or doubts or questions about who he is and what he likes. Str8 all the way here.

Connie

[LIZA]

I think the majority of men are at least somewhat turned on by two women together.........But I don't think very many men realize how many women would like to see their partner with another man. The more I talk to different women the more I find it is a fairly common female fantasy, although certainly not in the league of 2 women

[danc694u]

Originally posted by LIZA:
I don't think very many men realize how many women would like to see their partner with another man

This is a very true statement. Thankfully, it is not a fantasy of my SO. We have many friends that have told us the same thing. Friends with straight husbands. Friends without husbands. All want to see 2 men together. One even found her a bi couple (males). Started a relationship, which lasted several months. She was a very happy camper LOL.

I must admit curiosity on my part. But, I'm still not going to go down that road. No way...No way

[Stratecpl]

I have several things I want to say so let's see where to begin....

TNT, you stated that "This lifestyle is suppose to be about openess in ones own sexuality, but unfortunately there are a lot of closed minded people."

I'm not closed-minded at all. I know what I like and I will pursue just that. If other people want to cross new lines at every turn, that's their bag... NOT mine. If it's unfortunate that there are still a few straight people out there, I guess it's just a note of good music to me. If it's some way of suppressing sexuality by being straight, then I guess I'm guilty. But I really enjoy being straight and I will fight anyone who tries to make me do otherwise. That's just MY take on this....

michigancouple, my wife is also very attractive but we don't have any problems with other women trying to get it on with her. Many have asked, now, to be sure.... but she would fight them tooth and nail, just as I would... LOL Nor do the men decide they want to do the BI thing either.

You say that many men are secretly bi-curious? Well, I agree, many are. If they are here, at MY house, they'd better not make any mention of that fact. If they do, they know the way out of our door.

Now, we can be friends with anyone, whether they are bi, gay, lesbian, or the dreaded STRAIGHT. We just won't play with anyone who tries to push his/her ideas on us. I have absolutely NO fantasies whatsoever concerning M/M play. If you do, that's great and I hope you have lots of fun. I will just never be involved.

And you mention swinging as evolutionizing? Yes, it has an awful lot. The way it USED to be was M/F, MFM, FMF, MMMMF.... etc. Nowadays, we find women looking just for other women, and men seeking other men. Somehow, this doesn't seem right to me. If you like it, do it. Most of the swinging world will applaud you. But if 999 people jump off the roof of some tall building and then it's YOUR turn, will you do likewise just to be cool? Or to follow the trend??

My preferences are mine and no one will ever sway them in my mind. Likewise, I'll never ask my wife to do anything she doesn't want to, because she makes her own mind up. She's not my puppet, doing things merely to excite me or please my fantasy. I actually fantasize about seeing her with other men. That's right, MEN. Not women. I fantasize about seeing ME with those women...........

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

[LaylaSusanne]

Well, Tom has always been openly (with me anyway) bi-sexual. He had been with men before he was married, and after, before he met me. When we began dating, he was really turning that part of himself off, and trying to pretend it wasn't there.

But, he is what he is, and that's fine with me. I wouldn't want him to try to be anything or anyone else. He actually hasn't been with another man in several years sexually. We swing with couples, so of course there have been other men around, but no bi activity. I would LOVE to see him with another man. We talk about it often, and just talking about it turns me on (AND him)
But so far, the planets have not aligned just right.

We are very open about both of our sexuality. We don't hide it or anything. But we also never would push it on anyone, or even ask for someone to "try bi" if they weren't already. Most of the couples we are with are straight. Again, some bi play with some of the women. I am not bi myself, but I can enjoy certain aspects of being with a woman, as long as there's a man nearby to take over. My friends and I have borrowed a term from this board and call it "Bi-Occasional"

And none of the couples we play with have a problem with Tom being bi-sexual. Maybe because we don't hide it, and also because Tom makes it VERY clear he is not expecting anything from anybody, of any gender. No one does anything they don't want to do. Some of the guys are kind of what I would call maybe "bi-sensual" (I don't know) They will touch each other, rub each other's chests or backs, or lean against each other. They comment on each other's bodies, grab butss and stuff. Not locker room like, much more sexually. But no penis-touching, and no blow jobs. I think it's kinda funny. And strange.

It's clear to me they could easily be with a man, and would enjoy it, and probably even think about and fantasize about it. But they have this invisible "penis line" they don't cross.

And michigancouple, how far is Michigan from Florida?

If it gets too cold there this winter, you are MORE than welcome to visit us!

Layla

We have placed one ad looking for a bi male or preferably a couple with a bi male, but we got so slammed with single guys saying they were bicurious orally, and had never been with a man, but detailing all the ways they could please ME, that we gave up on it and decided, like everything else, if it's meant to happen, it will. If we meet someone, and get to know them, and the guy turns out to be Bi, great! We're not going out of our way, or changing our usual way of finding playmates.

[Mike and Jan]

Great topic! Lot's of fire here. LOL! Ok, Michigancouple, as you can probably tell by our stories and profile we're much like you two. Straight female, curious male. And, there are many couples just like us out there. Now I have to admit that I'd love to see Jan with another woman but would never try to talk her into it. She's just not interested and that's..., that. I think this is sort of like smoking to some folks. It's ok for some but not in our house or motorhome. So, just step outside if you want to smoke. Hey, wonder if we two guys should just step outside to play with each other at a party? Of course, our wives would certainly want to go with us to watch. Well, really curious to see the rest of the responses to this thread, so come on folks..., keep firing off the comments!

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[TNT]

Ok, to answer a few questions and clarify a few statements.

First, Liza we are in Florida.

I agree with Michigancouple, I think that there are a lot of men who are bi-curious, but for some reason will not admit this. Why this is,is something I don't understand.

Stratecpl..I did not say you were closed minded(not from your first response anyway). I said there were a lot of closed minded people out there. My point being..when other couples or single men find out that my husband is bi, they tend to never want to see us again...just because he is bi, dosen't mean he has to act on it..Like Layla said...he dosen't expect it( and neither do I if the woman is not bi). You said yourself (in your second response)...that if a man is at your house and mentions that he is bi, he knows the way out. Why is that ? And isn't that being closed minded ? Being bi means that you enjoy both sexes, but not that you necessarily have to have both sexes. You could be missing out on a very enjoyable experience with a man for a very good straight MFM play session. The bi-people we know (we know a lot of bi and straight people that we play with) would never try and push an encounter of bi-activity on someone that was not bi themselves..they would just say ok, and enjoy the straight play. Anyone who does try and push their beliefs on someone else, it being bi-activity, S&M, B&D, or any number of other activities is not someone we would want to play with at all. Yes, we both enjoy our bi-play activities, we also enjoy our straight-play activites but, above all else, we enjoy just being with each other.

Teresa