That is definitely something we've wrestled with when putting down a story.
And yes, we try to be generic as possible in hopes that it wont relate directly back to someone.
Sometimes though I do believe there is something to be learned from bad experiences. Maybe something to adjust for your own experience, maybe just the act of writing and discussing it allows you to notice something you didnt previously.
Definitely a mixed bag, and if your name/location is easy to match up to real life (ours isnt, we use a different handle on swinger websites), then it's not too far of a stretch to imagine someone realizing that story is about them.