Stood Up

riswingcpl · 10-19-2006, 05:45 PM

Your response was perfectly normal, acceptable and understandable. This guy is a dickhead, and you're better off to have found that out before anything happened, rather than after you've opened yourselves up to him.

Keep looking...you'll find the right guy. It took us a while, but we eventually did.

M

bigjoehd · 10-19-2006, 07:21 PM

You are not alone,on one occasion a single friend cancelled a weekend we had planned because he wanted to go deer hunting on opening day,on another occasion he canceled on us to go watch a football game,this was our last straw & we both told him that these things are the reason that he is single & most likely will remain that way.

Is it just me or is there something terribly wrong with a man turning down a night of fun with a beautiful woman & going to a ball game instead?

Gladiola4u · 10-19-2006, 07:28 PM

I've got to tell you MLK that at least you used nice words to tell him where to go. If it would have been me, I would have given him a piece of my mind. That was plain and simply ignorant and a person like that does not deserve a second chance because who know what would happen. And that comment that he gave you, oh man, you have no idea what is going through my mind.

gatorvol64 · 10-19-2006, 07:32 PM

I think you handled that very well.

No respect and no manners.

Glad you didn't waste any more time on him.

Vol

lovefest04 · 10-19-2006, 07:50 PM

You were so in the right....What a prick.

I just feel sorry for the woman who marrys or dates him. I can just see the poor girl in a super sexy outfit, stripping for him in the living room while he ignores her and watches T.V.

Dude get your priorities straight. A ball game and a beer vs. hours of sweet pleasure with a beautiful woman. Men can be soooo stupid.

S

Dynamar · 10-19-2006, 07:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovefest04

Dude get your priorities straight. A ball game and a beer vs. hours of sweet pleasure with a beautiful woman. Men can be soooo stupid.

Or just the beer... it sounded like he was just going to a party, not the game. What a dumbass!

**rpu3** · 10-19-2006, 07:54 PM

I'm sorry that it didn't work out. I am glad you found out in advance... and you certainly were not playing a game; that comment was just out of line. It's not fun finding out that all that time trying to get to know someone to make sure it was a good fit was for naught, only after the deed is done. Been there, done that, and I'm glad you didn't get the t-shirt.

Rebecca

dinkydow4us · 10-19-2006, 09:06 PM

I'll bet he's gay.

What else could it be ?

Nobody in thier right mind would turn down a chance like that :rollseyes Keep looking, there's a lot of good guy's out there, you'll find one.

Good luck D. D.

MoonLightKiss · 10-19-2006, 11:46 PM

You guys are wonderful...absolutely wonderful...thank you all for the confidence boost. It really makes me feel better knowing it wasn't me but him being an ass. And ya know what, who cares. Plenty of single men out there, just waiting to give up a night of ballgames and beer to be with a nice woman.

I stated this on another post here, and am gonna repeat myself again

Sometimes fate steps in and takes a hand when we are about to make a big mistake. So gonna have to say thank you to fate for taking a hand in this. I can just imagine how it might have all played out had it happened.

MrsVan · 10-20-2006, 07:09 AM

I agree with everyone else! He is an ass and there is no reason for you to feel guilty. We have had singles and couples cancel on us at the last minute and I find it to very rude. We actually had a couple who would make plans with us, cancel at the last minute and then they forgot that they cancelled with us and what their excuse was for cancelling and end up bringing up later about how they met another couple and hung out for the day.

We also have a single guy that we know is a great guy and he had to cancel on us the 2nd date because something had come up. I did not ask questions and knew that it had to be something of importance because his personality and the way he does things in the lifestyle shows that he did not cancel just because but that he had a ligite reason.

I agree that life gets in the way and sometimes things happen and there is nothing you can do about it. But if you make plans and cancel because something better came along, then that is just plain rude.

MrsVan

Amanda69 · 10-20-2006, 07:14 AM

It was bad enough he blew you off in the first place but to then not accept the consequences of his choice and try to turn it around on you is just foolish and idiotic. As someone said some people are single for a reason.

Spoomonkey · 10-20-2006, 07:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MoonLightKiss

So my question, Did I play a game and not realize it? Should I feel bad about changing my mind?

Nope - you were right on the money.

He was trying to turn the blame back on you - when really, if he makes plans and changes them, he is playing games. A pre-game baseball party or sex? Hmmm... Maybe he's queer...

:rollseyes

No - he is a dick - and his last e-mail was little more than a tantrum. Finding a good single guy is TOUGH. Sorry you are learning the hard way.

Spoomonkey

curiousagain · 10-20-2006, 07:47 AM

You were much nicer in your goodbye email than most of us would have been or he had any right to expect. You didn't do anything wrong, he did. And as for playing games, that was him, no one else.

VanHlebar · 10-20-2006, 09:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MoonLightKiss

You guys are wonderful...absolutely wonderful...thank you all for the confidence boost. It really makes me feel better knowing it wasn't me but him being an ass. And ya know what, who cares. Plenty of single men out there, just waiting to give up a night of ballgames and beer to be with a nice woman.

I stated this on another post here, and am gonna repeat myself again

Sometimes fate steps in and takes a hand when we are about to make a big mistake. So gonna have to say thank you to fate for taking a hand in this. I can just imagine how it might have all played out had it happened.

Well you are correct about that...it's a good thing that you found out before you maybe made a mistake.

Finding a good single guy is really just about as hard as finding a single lady to be honest. Our best luck with MFMs has been with a husband of a couple.

You know...MrsVan might be willing to lend me out..all in the name of helping a fellow board member out I'm sure.

Oh crap...I forgot you wanted a "good" single guy

Good luck in your search and just be patient...it will happen eventually.

-Van

MrsVan · 10-20-2006, 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VanHlebar

You know...MrsVan might be willing to lend me out..all in the name of helping a fellow board member out I'm sure.

Oh crap...I forgot you wanted a "good" single guy

-Van

I would be more than willing to share MrVan as long as I can come and watch

As MrVan stated we have found some of the best MFM and MFF to be with couples as "good single guys" are hard to come by.

In time you will find a good single guy until then be patient and just have fun with couples in mixing it up if everyone agrees and is comfortable.. facelick

MrsVan

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10-19-2006, 05:45 PM	#16 (permalink)
riswingcpl Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 172 Location: Rhode Island Status: couple...male half posting	Re: Well, I was wrong Your response was perfectly normal, acceptable and understandable. This guy is a dickhead, and you're better off to have found that out before anything happened, rather than after you've opened yourselves up to him. Keep looking...you'll find the right guy. It took us a while, but we eventually did. M __________________ An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex. - Aldous Huxley

10-19-2006, 07:21 PM	#17 (permalink)
bigjoehd Here to Stay Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 63 Location: michigan Status: married couple	Re: Well, I was wrong You are not alone,on one occasion a single friend cancelled a weekend we had planned because he wanted to go deer hunting on opening day,on another occasion he canceled on us to go watch a football game,this was our last straw & we both told him that these things are the reason that he is single & most likely will remain that way. Is it just me or is there something terribly wrong with a man turning down a night of fun with a beautiful woman & going to a ball game instead?

10-19-2006, 07:28 PM	#18 (permalink)
Gladiola4u Here to Stay Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 81 Location: Ontario, Canada Status: Couple	Re: Well, I was wrong I've got to tell you MLK that at least you used nice words to tell him where to go. If it would have been me, I would have given him a piece of my mind. That was plain and simply ignorant and a person like that does not deserve a second chance because who know what would happen. And that comment that he gave you, oh man, you have no idea what is going through my mind. __________________ __________________ I want it all...And I want it smothered in whipped cream and chocolate.

10-19-2006, 07:32 PM	#19 (permalink)
gatorvol64 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,342 Location: Florida Status: Married Couple & half of a quad Blog Entries: 11	Re: Well, I was wrong I think you handled that very well. No respect and no manners. Glad you didn't waste any more time on him. Vol __________________ He is the Gator and she is the Vol.

10-19-2006, 07:50 PM	#20 (permalink)
lovefest04 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 145 Location: Northern California	Re: Well, I was wrong You were so in the right....What a prick. I just feel sorry for the woman who marrys or dates him. I can just see the poor girl in a super sexy outfit, stripping for him in the living room while he ignores her and watches T.V. Dude get your priorities straight. A ball game and a beer vs. hours of sweet pleasure with a beautiful woman. Men can be soooo stupid. S

10-19-2006, 07:54 PM	#22 (permalink)
rpu3 Doing it our way... Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 2,654 Location: Ohio Status: Married Female Swing Lifestyle Name:rpu3 Blog Entries: 2	Re: Well, I was wrong I'm sorry that it didn't work out. I am glad you found out in advance... and you certainly were not playing a game; that comment was just out of line. It's not fun finding out that all that time trying to get to know someone to make sure it was a good fit was for naught, only after the deed is done. Been there, done that, and I'm glad you didn't get the t-shirt. Rebecca __________________ I'll give up my bad habits as soon as equally satisfying good habits become available. A. Brilliant

10-19-2006, 09:06 PM	#23 (permalink)
dinkydow4us Active Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 46 Location: cent. ny Status: married male	Re: Well, I was wrong I'll bet he's gay. What else could it be ? Nobody in thier right mind would turn down a chance like that :rollseyes Keep looking, there's a lot of good guy's out there, you'll find one. Good luck D. D.

10-19-2006, 11:46 PM	#24 (permalink)
MoonLightKiss Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 406 Location: Kentucky Status: Couple	Re: Well, I was wrong You guys are wonderful...absolutely wonderful...thank you all for the confidence boost. It really makes me feel better knowing it wasn't me but him being an ass. And ya know what, who cares. Plenty of single men out there, just waiting to give up a night of ballgames and beer to be with a nice woman. I stated this on another post here, and am gonna repeat myself again Sometimes fate steps in and takes a hand when we are about to make a big mistake. So gonna have to say thank you to fate for taking a hand in this. I can just imagine how it might have all played out had it happened. __________________ Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. - Marianne Wilson

10-20-2006, 07:09 AM	#25 (permalink)
MrsVan Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 667 Location: Ohio Status: M.Female Swing Lifestyle Name:MrMrsVanHlebar	Re: Well, I was wrong I agree with everyone else! He is an ass and there is no reason for you to feel guilty. We have had singles and couples cancel on us at the last minute and I find it to very rude. We actually had a couple who would make plans with us, cancel at the last minute and then they forgot that they cancelled with us and what their excuse was for cancelling and end up bringing up later about how they met another couple and hung out for the day. We also have a single guy that we know is a great guy and he had to cancel on us the 2nd date because something had come up. I did not ask questions and knew that it had to be something of importance because his personality and the way he does things in the lifestyle shows that he did not cancel just because but that he had a ligite reason. I agree that life gets in the way and sometimes things happen and there is nothing you can do about it. But if you make plans and cancel because something better came along, then that is just plain rude. MrsVan

10-20-2006, 07:14 AM	#26 (permalink)
Amanda69 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 907 Location: Mississauga, ON Canada Status: couple	Re: Well, I was wrong It was bad enough he blew you off in the first place but to then not accept the consequences of his choice and try to turn it around on you is just foolish and idiotic. As someone said some people are single for a reason. __________________ Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

10-20-2006, 07:47 AM	#28 (permalink)
curiousagain A gentleman never tells Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 2,085 Location: Tennessee Status: Single Male	Re: Well, I was wrong You were much nicer in your goodbye email than most of us would have been or he had any right to expect. You didn't do anything wrong, he did. And as for playing games, that was him, no one else. __________________ "I never want to be the fat elvis." Jon Bon Jovi

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