Bad experience at private party

[imsnowman]

I can't believe the host/hostess continue to put up with that woman's "stuff". In my opinion she should not be reinvited. I can't believe she could be so good as to be worth overlooking her bitchiness.

[hfire269]

I would have told her the same thing only probably not quite as nice especially if I had been drinking. Then we would have left and if we where ever invited back I wouldnt go if that lady was gonna be there. My hubby would have been speechless most likely.

[BodyScape02]

KUDOS to your wife... She ROCKS.!!!

The"Classless Bitch" started it... your wife just had the self esteem and the balls to set her straight... evidently something everyone else in the room was lacking.

She made a play to be the Alpha female... and she ran into the one female that didn't cower.

You know who she is now and can always decline invitations based on her participation.

~Cat

[BTampa]

Obviously in this situation the "classless bitch" was in the wrong. Everyone pretty much sees that the same way. Since I didn't see anyone offer this variation, I'll offer it:

The way you did it, while not wrong, probably didn't really change anything. Since the hosts already know how she can be, they aren't likely to stop inviting her for this infraction... and the classless bitch probably felt quite pleased with herself for having chased off what she thinks was a pair of voyeurs.

Another way to handle it would have been to calmly tell her that you were new, and very much wanted to play, but weren't sure whether it was appropriate to jump right in or wait to be invited over... so you'd decided to wait... but that after being told off the mood just wasn't there and you'd be on your way.

Doing it that way may not have had any different result... OR... it may have made her stop and think about what an ass she had been... and turn her into a better guest in the future.

Just a thought...

[Vespertine]

Go BTampa!

That would be the perfect thing to do.

I would never think to say something like that... I'd probably either cry or bitchslap her ....A retort like yours would make even an Ice Queen take pause and check herself.

[JnCC]

As usual, I'm seeing this from a little different perspective.

The people at this party are all well-known to one another. It's highly possible that they've become somewhat jaded to each other as well. Any new couple would generate a lot of interest in an established group like that.

They've also been together long enough to establish a social order. Apparently, "Classless Bitch" is at, or very near, the top if it. There's no reason that "CB" couldn't have mentioned, either to the host, or discretely to the new couple, that "the playroom was for play." Instead, she went out of her way to make the new couple feel unwelcome, and she did it in a very public way. She did that to re-assert, both to the "newbies" and to the established members of the group, just where she stood in that social order. A gorilla would have beat his or her chest, while an elephant would have trumpeted loudly, then shit. I'm surprised this woman did neither.

The situation was made even more awkward by the fact that both the host and hostess lacked the fortitude to challenge "CB's" authority to make the rules in their own home. Of course they invite "CB" to their parties. They wouldn't dare NOT invite her.

I believe that when somebody "acts out" like "CB," it's because they feel they're being threatened in some way. Something "acple4fun" said or did brought out the alpha-bitch in "CB." It's not hard to deduce from that, that in addition to being the "newbies," Mrs acpl4fun may also be younger and/or better looking, and more personable overall than "CB." This may turn out to be another case of "Now aren't you glad you DIDN'T play with any of these people?"

There are other groups out there where this kind of behavior wouldn't have been tolerated for one second. Hopefully, the OP has already found some of them.

[KajiKurai]

After reading this thread my SO and I are really beginning to wonder about the lifestyle couples in our area. We are about twenty minutes from acple4fun's town. Between reading this thread and getting responses from "pushy" couples in the Reno/Carson area we may keep our activities limited to out of area only vs. local events.

You were in the right acple4fun, and handled the situation much better than I would have.

[CB_n_Red]

Just to make things clear - the initials inn my moniker don't stand for Classless Bitch.....

CB

[good times]

Originally Posted by KajiKurai

After reading this thread my SO and I are really beginning to wonder about the lifestyle couples in our area. We are about twenty minutes from acple4fun's town. Between reading this thread and getting responses from "pushy" couples in the Reno/Carson area we may keep our activities limited to out of area only vs. local events.

Actually, they said that it was an "over the hill" event which would be an out of area party, I assume in the Sacromento area. We have been to all the clubs in the Reno area regularly and a few house parties and have never run into anything like this here. Once in a while you run into pushy people but fortunately at the clubs this type of thing isn't tolerated.

[acple4fun]

Yes it did take place in the Sacramento area not in the Reno/Carson area. Also it was a private party not one of the pay to attend affairs or established party houses in that area. That is one of the reasons we were so taken back by this ladies conduct we would have understood if we would have been in a group room or orgy room in a party house and had not jumped into the swing of things.

In this case the group of people there (5 or 6 couples) had been in the kitchen and living room area of the house. While in the kitchen and living room area everybody had just been in the mingling stage of the party, enjoying a drink with conversation after the initial introductions were made. This part of the party had been going on for a little over an hour after we arrived. It seemed as though the hosts were waited for some stragglers to arrive. During this time there had been no sexual advances or play among anybody at the party. Up to this point I guess you could compare the party to most any office parties I had ever been to. We had chatted with every couple that was there and had gone through the introductions with all of them. It was very apparent that other than us there was only one other couple that was not shall we say in the group and knew everybody there.

A few minutes after the last couple arrived the group started to migrate into other parts of the house. It was apparent that the party was to take place up stares in the den area. Or, at least that was my impression and that proved to be the case. We weren’t sure though and held back a little bit behind some of the others for clarification of this from the hosts. There were a few people still left in the living room area when the host came up to us and informed us that they were going into the den to play and invited us to join the party there.

It couldn’t have been more than just a few minutes between the time we arrived in the room and the time people first started filtering into that room. Like I said earlier that the party was already in progress and some of the people there were either already nude and engaging in some form of sex or getting undressed when we came into the room. We had just walked into the room and were getting our bearings when this incident took place, well within the first five minutes anyway. We hadn’t been in the room for more that five minutes before we were approached by this lady. In fact the only people that were already naked were the two guys and the lady engaged in the three-some by the door. The guy that was getting head from the two ladies was dressed except for having his pants pulled down around his knees and as for the ladies with him one was still dressed and the other one, the one that approached us only had her top off. So it wasn’t like we were the only ones in the room that were still clothed and watching everybody else having sex.

I guess this is the point of my question. The three by the door engaged in the three-some didn’t acknowledge our entry into the room, it was apparent that they were engaged in their own thing and didn’t want anybody to join them at that time. In fact the host when he walked into the room had walked by them, he greeted them and gave her a little grope on the boob and they didn’t even acknowledge him so he moved on. The two ladies that were playing with the guy looked like they were in the process of getting started and there wasn’t much room for the Mrs. To join them at the time. The other couple who we weren’t sure if they were together or had just paired up were watching the two ladies and the guy they were playing with and hadn’t started to get undressed yet. Nobody in this group of eight people had acknowledged us by making eye contact or in any other way up to this point. There was another couple sitting on another sofa in the room that were not engaged in any type of activity and the host and hostess were laying some blankets and pillows on the floor.

Although we didn’t like the way the lady handled this and her action toward us was unacceptable to us. Our question is what is acceptable protocol in this situation. Is it expected of us to approach this group and for the lack of a better term push our way into their action. Or, should we proceed like we did and wait for some indication of interest before we join them. We haven’t been to many affairs like this before but when we are playing we will give some kind of indication to other people if we are interested in having them join us. I don’t know I guess it’s just the way we were brought up but we find it hard to touch somebody before some kind of indication from that person that they want to be touched. We like to play as much as anybody we are just afraid of breaking some kind of taboo or overstepping some line that we shouldn’t.

[acple4fun]

Originally Posted by BTampa

Another way to handle it would have been to calmly tell her that you were new, and very much wanted to play, but weren't sure whether it was appropriate to jump right in or wait to be invited over... so you'd decided to wait... but that after being told off the mood just wasn't there and you'd be on your way.

Doing it that way may not have had any different result... OR... it may have made her stop and think about what an ass she had been... and turn her into a better guest in the future.

Just a thought...

Great way to have handled it, I wish we would have been quick enough to have thought of something like that to have said. We will keep that in mind if this ever happens again. This time though we hadn't given a reply to this kind of action any thought beforehand and when you don't think about a reply before hand most often your replies are in the form of three and four letter words.