Separetely or together? What are your limits?

We were curious as to what parameters you set when swinging separately: same room, same house, or all the above?

Wife and I are an all the above couple.

Together to us means together, actually we prefer same bed.

Although we have only been with single women so far... we have set our boundary.

That boundary, however, was already tested just recently.

We want to swing only together... same room preferably... maybe same area/house, however, in the case of a single man contacting me several weeks ago (a guy we've known since we were children), the awkwardness of the situation made us decide that I should swing alone with him (at least at first) if we were to ever do anything. There is a lot more to the story (in childhood, my hubby hated him, but the guy truthfully cannot remember much about hubby), but it's mostly irrelevant, except for the one fact.

Hubby likes the idea of my being with him (may even be a reverse-revenge thing maybe?) but because it's so unbelievably awkward (we spent an hour or so on separate ends of a couch attempting to catch up on 10 years without seeing one another before he even touched me), it would probably be better, at least, at first to swing alone with him.

Any input on that? Like I said prior... we've only been with women otherwise, and still haven't experienced a couple, although we have some in the possible works for this weekend's club Xmas event.

HELP

Any time we party we are always in the same building. We do not go out on "dates" without each other. That seems to be our main rule if you want to call it that.

Laura may find a guy at a club that is not real up on having a 3sum or me being there and if she is comfortable with him she will go alone in a private room with him. I may do the same thing at times with a lady. Most of the time we prefer that both of us is atleast in the same area to watch each other.

Most of the time we end up in the same "pile"

Main rule we have is that we Always know where the other one is even if we are not in the same room with each other.

Well, since we got into this to enhance our pleasure as a couple, it's same room only for us.

We voted for same room, since there was no choice for "same bed". We always stay together, even when playing with others.

As others have said, How about "same bed"?

Had to vote for "all of the above". Really depends on the situation.

Annette

It is usually same room. We started this together, and we usually stay together. Sometimes the same bed, sometimes, just a different place in the room.

Our regular monthly party can be same building, but there are very few swinging partners I feel that comfortable with. It all depends on the circumstances, and we know how mine backfired.

But there are others we have known for a while, where the circumstaces may change, and lead us to separate rooms in the future. Only time will tell. But, it will always be within earshot!

mrs hmr

We've done both same room and separate rooms. Both are fun in their own way. Same room is fun because we do it together and can watch each other in action. With separate rooms, we get to tell each other what went on when we get back together and that usually is the beginning of some super-hot lovemaking. Which tastes better? Ice Cream or Chocolate Cake?

We tried playing separately once, under special circumstances, but it didn't turn out the way we wanted, so we haven't tried it again. We might, under special circumstances, but only with the other's knowledge and approval.

We've both given the other our blessing to fuck certain (named) people should the opportunity ever arise, but that is so unlikely it's really a non-issue.

Mr. Alura

Although I haven't as yet, my wife has played separately. I love it when she walks in the door and I know what she has been doing. Besides, she brings home a video of her fun which we watch together and then our fun begins!!!

We only play together in the same room. Part of the fun is seeing each other get pleasured by our playmates!

Always same room, this is definitely a "team sport."

The only situation where we were in the same room with two beds (we're pretty new)- we took advantage of it and moved them together to make one big one! So i guess we still have to answer same bed.

We look at swinging separately as a division between us - just our personal philosophy and find nothing wrong with others having a difference of opinion. The best thing about this community is the ability to express yourself the way you want without judgement from others.

We're still in the discussion phase--although, without the kids last night, our discussions got pretty intense and detailed!--but we seem to agree that if we're confident enough to let one another play with others (and we're essentially there), there's not a big difference between playing in the same bed vs. same room vs. different room vs...hell, why not wherever we want to?

We're going to be completely open and honest with whatever happens, just as we have with our (limited) experiences in the past, so we don't see much of a difference over the circumstances, other than the inherent excitement of watching one another vs. wondering vs. all-out saying, "OK, so tell me all about it."

We have major trust and years between us, but...that's just us.

Technically, we have nothing against swinging separately. We are certainly secure enough in our relationship to allow it. It just so happens that our fantasies lead to group sex rather than just different partners.

We have played separately when in a house party setting, but our desires are for hot group sex whether 3somes, 4somes or moresomes. We already have the best couple (one on one) sex we could have with each other, so why spend time playing separately when we could be having more fun together with others.

Telling each other about what occured while playing separately was/is hot, but we would much rather be there to watch each other, even if only as an observer.

Our play time is limited enough that we prefer to spend it pursuing what we both enjoy the most.

TNT:fun:

I suppose its the fantasy part that really drives me/us for same room only, but then there is the security issue as well. If ever there was a reason for me to give up the idea and stay vanilla, security would be it.

Maybe you've heard the saying: "You can take the soldier out of the Army, but you can't take the Army out of the soldier."

I supposed that what little you can put in a nut shell about me, this takes up about 55% of that space. I believe I can vouch for her on this matter as well, as she has spent more time being a military spouse then I've spent in the Army.

Hopefully, we'll make the couples club in April.

We have done same room, seperate rooms, same building, depending upon who it is and other factors.

Guess I should have clarified it more closely. For us if we are in the same room, it is 99.9% of the time same bed, unless the bed is too small, then we end up all rolling around on the floor having a blast.

I am for the same room if all agree to it, it has to be agreed by all.

The wife and I have swing strictly together usually MFM with our best friend. Lately the discussion has come up about just the FM mostly from me. This would not cause us any problems at all mainly because he is into playing with us not just for his pleasures but is very into our reasons and therefore would compliment the situation.

We've not done anything but same room before, but under the right circumstances would be okay with separate room.

=)

When we say that we only play together, we mean at the same location. She has gentlemen she prefers to play with as I have ladies that I prefer. There are times (probably over half the time) when one or the other of us disappear into a playroom with a partner and the spouse does NOT come along.

For us, it is that we enjoy seeing one another have fun. If we are at the same location we either watch, participate or just look in from time to time.

We do not insist on any way, but if the couple does, it depends on how well we know them. Same room with a couple that we have not had a chance to get to know well. Seperate rooms with those couples that we have established a frienship with and trust.

We are a "play together, stay together" couple. We are always in the same room. A significant part of the fun we've experienced is being present for each other's orgasms when we are not the one causing it.

Same house/building

If we're at a party or club, we will separate, but prefer a group setting in the same room. We enjoy watching each other have fun.

We don't date separately.

Mrs. D

Our best experiences have been same room, especially same bed.

If we know the couple, then we are open to different rooms. If they are new to us , then same room until we grow comfortable and gain trust and closeness with that couple.

We agreed that it would be same room only. I enjoy it more when he is in the room. As far as same bed - we as a couple don't require that since there have been times when there is no room on the bed or there are too many people ....

We have done same room and same house but different rooms. I am open to seperate dates but have not discussed with hubby.

We swing mostly with men, so I am left to do what ever I choose, Bob joins in if asked and the men are bi.

99% of the time we are same room or same house. However, he gave me permission to hook-up at my HS reunion if I wanted to, and I told him the same. I went to mine and got lucky...he did not.

We prefer same room, that (as Robin Williams once said with a lisp) "enhances the sexual stimulation".

We have reached that level where anything is open. For us it all depends on the comfort level of our playmates, same room different room it doesn't matter to us. We have even got so comfortable with some close friends that we have even worked out going out on individual dates with their spouses, but that is another story. When we go out to play we play as a team and a flexible for what the situation calls for.

My how the times have changed! It's been a year since I answered this, and we've since discovered that separate room (and maybe even alone play, under the right circumstances) are a-okay.

=)

Dave and I, even though our marriage is super strong and very secure, just can't see us venturing into a separate room type of situation. It's a rush for both of us to see our partners in action. We don't want to take away from our play partners, and I hope we never will, but we still prefer same room, same bed type of stuff.

For the most part we are a same room/bed couple, but have been known to swing in separate rooms and even alone at times with our favorites.

I voted same room. We are pretty new to this with only one other couple and a few experiences with them under our belts. All of the experiences we've had have been same room swaps. I'm not sure we would be comfortable separating from each other to have sex with another person. Besides, I said it in another thread, having Trixie in the same room with me allows me to watch her get down... and when we're close enough in the body pile, I can reach over and touch her too. She can do the same to me... and I just love looking over at her, right into her eyes when she's fucking someone else. I think it is a huge turn-on.

Ultimately it depends on the situation but generally we prefer to be right together. If the situation is right (special circumstances) we will swing seperately. Recently he joined a couple for an mfm who we had an mfmfmfm experience with a few weeks prior. It was something the other couple wanted to experience and I was willing to offer up my husband. He of course was very willing since he was going to be in their town and I was completely unavailable. They had a good time, I enjoyed hearing all about it. I certainly don't want to make a habit out of it though. We're attending our first house party this weekend and we plan on same room fun. We're flexible if it doesn't work out that way but we'll definitely try to steer it toward our preferences. It's easy to be flexible and comfortable when we know 13 out of the 15 couples attending.

We have played in the same room, sometimes in separate beds and also in separate rooms but always in the same house.

We prefer same bed/room but when at a party we each go our own way.

It depends. We prefer same room, same bed. At the club, we stick together...At a house party, we are free to go off alone after checking in. We don't do dates with others, but I have been "borrowed" to make a threesome with another couple. We each have hall passes when one is traveling alone without the other, but neither of us has ever done that.

In the poll, I chose 'all of the above'.

Yet another poll we answered a few years ago, but now the answer isn't the same.

We were same room folks, but that's no longer a requirement.

We are same room and prefer same bed. Although if we are in a motel room that has two beds in the room, that is fine too.

Same room for us. Same bed preferable. But we have on just a couple of occasions been in separate rooms. It wasn't as much fun so we are sticking to same room only.

We will do it all, but our preference is same room/same bed - more group fun than swapping.

He also enjoys when I play without him while he is working or something like that. He knows he'll come home to an awesome story and some hot sex. I'm good with him playing without me, but it doesn't excite me nearly as much (I feel detached from the situation instead of involved).

We are all of the above!

Alicia

He also enjoys when I play without him while he is working or something like that. He knows he'll come home to an awesome story and some hot sex.

Michael is the same way and I can't even begin to describe how AMAZING the sex is when I return home. He loves it when I text him during my encounter and give him little hints as to what we've done or are about to do. Sometimes, I'll text him a photo and it drives him crazy. There have been times when I come home after 'having drinks with a friend' at 11 PM and we're not finished having sex until 4 AM. This of course includes everything, the story telling while kissing, foreplay, etc. As I've said elsewhere, we've been married for 24 years, in the lifestyle for I think almost 4 and are having the best sex we've ever had!

Alicia

Our priorities are this : Same bed #1, Same room #2, Same house #3, Separately never with one exception (Sonia). If you don't know us and need an explanation, post it or pm us.

Prefer same bed, but if it's not available, same room at the very least. We love watching each other, so there's no reason to go separately.

Wife is OK (and allowed) to play with a single girl on her own if she is on a business trip, but not with a couple or a single guy, mainly for safety reason. Hubby hasn't considered playing separately so we haven't even talked about it.

The majority of the swinging that my wife and I did was together, in the same room. However, she had a steady FWB relationship with my best friend for three years and they sometimes got together alone. (It was really hot the one time I surprised them and walked in on them together.) We also had an amazing weekend with another couple and there was same room, different room combinations throughout the weekend. My wife also spent a weekend with that couple in a FMF, I spent a weekend alone with the wife of that couple and finally my wife and I spent a weekend with the wife of that couple in a FMF. (Those were the days!)

Watching my wife with another man has always been my biggest turn on, but having her tell me what transpired when I wasn't there is a close second!