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Well, its happened....because of a couple bad experiences the wife has decided that she is thru meeting with couples for now. We've met 3 couples while in the lifestyle, the first one there was way to much drama, rules kept changing, and she always felt "obligated" to fuck him, the 2nd was jealous of the fact she has had a long time bf, that he knew of before we started playing, and was tryiing to get her to break it off with him, the third couple was going great, we were both looking forward in getting together, the problem was that the hubby never even talked to her once in 3 weeks....Shes doesn't want to fuck someone that wouldn't even talk to her....So she is just going to stick with the 2 guys she has now, and I'm on my own if I wanna meet others....

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I'm sorry those couples spoiled the experience for you. How do YOU feel about the situation? Are you happy with being "on your own" to meet others?

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Shes doesn't want to fuck someone that wouldn't even talk to her.

Can't say that I would feel much different. I would not want to be with someone that wouldn't talk to me either.

Lady C2S

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Sounds like you had two bad experiences with the first two couples. As far as the third, did the other husband know your wife's expectations when you first started talking with them, as far as texting and talking between dates? Some people like that, and some really don't. Many swingers just want to get together for play dates and not "put in time" in between. I'm not knocking either approach, but if you have definite desires in that area, you should be up front about it with possible playmates. That kind of thing is not assumed most of the time.

 

If you made her preferences clear to the other couple and the guy is ignoring her in spite of that, I guess that is rude. But maybe if you didn't, perhaps you could try again with a couple who is wanting the same kind of interaction between dates that you are.

 

In all three cases I guess I would say you should make very clear what your expectations are, and get a good feel for how the other couple feels about her boyfriend, if you are going to tell them about him. But maybe you don't need to tell. If it's no strings attached, then you shouldn't worry about their other playmates and they shouldn't worry about yours.

 

About drama... all you can do is talk to people enough before moving ahead, look for signs of instability, jealousy, hesitancy, etc. and just don't go there if something seems off.

 

I hope for your sake your wife decides to give it another try. Otherwise it's going to be pretty difficult for you to find any extracurricular fun without her help.

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