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Blocking Profiles on SLS

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Would you block someone who had politely rejected you- twice?

Not too long after we joined SLS, we politely replied to a couple who had sent us an email, but in whom we weren't interested. They immediately blocked us. I think they were just using blocking as a bookkeeping tool to let them know we were not someone to contact again. As we know, that's not the intended use of the "block" function, but oh well.

 

A couple of years later, we got another "initial" contact email from the same couple, on the same site. Apparently they had un-blocked us and had not kept track of the fact that they'd written before.

 

We've had a couple of emails of the five-word variety, with no punctuation, just fishing. Those are the kind I don't feel too badly about ignoring, though normally I reply to everything.

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This morning while I was cleaning out my mailbox I noticed that they had blocked us. Not that it matters, really, because we weren't interested, but it just seems to me that it's rude. Am I out of line thinking that? Would you block someone who had politely rejected you- twice?

It isn't uncommon for people who finally "get it"--you've said no thanks a couple times--to block profiles so that they don't make the mistake again of bothering you. It's their way of organizing. This way, if they tried to open your profile again and send you a message they'd see that they blocked you, which to them means they shouldn't contact you because they know there is no interest.

 

Be happy, they shouldn't bother you again. :)

 

LM

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I think that using the blocking tool as a form of bookkeeping a little on the harsh or rude side. We are on Swing Lifestyle and we only have a few people blocked for good reason. After some time you do forget about someone you have e-mailed or had a conversation with, so we use the "notes" feature and that reminds us about something for that particular profile. We use that for making notes on who doesnt reply to e-mails, or if their a smoker or not, that sort of thing.

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I try to be polite with everyone. I have taken some ribbing in the past because I thought something was rude, when others didn't see it as rude. But I have to wonder why someone would think that being blocked by someone you're not interested in is rude.

 

They e-mailed you, you're not interested, and you told them so. Then you found out they've blocked you. So what? You weren't interested, remember? What does it matter?

 

I think of it as them doing us a favor - we'll not be contacted by them again. Good riddance...

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I think that using the blocking tool as a form of bookkeeping a little on the harsh or rude side. We are on Swing Lifestyle and we only have a few people blocked for good reason. After some time you do forget about someone you have e-mailed or had a conversation with, so we use the "notes" feature and that reminds us about something for that particular profile. We use that for making notes on who doesnt reply to e-mails, or if their a smoker or not, that sort of thing.

Yes, using blocking as a way to keep track is harsh, because it implies that the blocked party has done something to warrant a sort of "talk to the hand" response. We use notes, like N8ture Girl, to remind us when we've already written to someone. This especially helps when our mail history sometimes goes poof, or when someone changes their profile and we want to remember what was previously there.

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I think that using the blocking tool as a form of bookkeeping a little on the harsh or rude side. We are on Swing Lifestyle and we only have a few people blocked for good reason. After some time you do forget about someone you have e-mailed or had a conversation with, so we use the "notes" feature and that reminds us about something for that particular profile. We use that for making notes on who doesnt reply to e-mails, or if their a smoker or not, that sort of thing.

 

That's exactly what we do. Initially I was using the block tool before I got more comfortable with the site. Then I would click on a profile I'd never seen or had contact with to find out we were blocked. Ok??? So I stopped blocking at that point and now I only block someone for good cause. Every profile we have contacted or has contacted us, I immediately add notes. I even put the date we emailed so that if we come across it again, we know we already emailed with no response.

 

I agree when you click a profile and you're blocked, the initial response is "WTF?". But then again, good to know up front not to waste your time.

 

We are smokers - it would be an easy assumption that someone allergic to smoke may use the block feature as bookkeeping - again, it doesn't matter if we're blocked - because they've saved us time and a rejection anyway.

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I try to be polite with everyone. I have taken some ribbing in the past because I thought something was rude, when others didn't see it as rude. But I have to wonder why someone would think that being blocked by someone you're not interested in is rude.

 

They e-mailed you, you're not interested, and you told them so. Then you found out they've blocked you. So what? You weren't interested, remember? What does it matter?

 

I think of it as them doing us a favor - we'll not be contacted by them again. Good riddance...

 

In most cases I would agree, but if I am looking through profiles and one peeks my interest and I am blocked then yes I would feel the WTF feeling especially if there were never anykind of e-mail correspondance, but was blocked because they didnt think we would be compatable. Thats where I would feel defensive is about the best word I could describe it and be like "what did I do?". I use the block feature to block pests, rude and pushy people.

If people want to use this method and have a 5 page blocked list then thats there perogative. How can one remember why they blocked someone after a months go by? I find the note feature works better for us.

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NCfuncouple98

I have been wanting to say this, I just love your signature, I chuckle everytime I see it :lol:

 

Ok sorry everyone...carry on...

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NCfuncouple98

I have been wanting to say this, I just love your signature, I chuckle everytime I see it :lol:

 

Ok sorry everyone...carry on...

 

LOL. Thanks - Mr. NC said that one night - I made him repeat it, then logged in and made it our signature. I just thought it was so clever!

 

Ok, sorry for hijack, please continue....

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In most cases I would agree, but if I am looking through profiles and one peeks my interest and I am blocked then yes I would feel the WTF feeling especially if there were never anykind of e-mail correspondance, but was blocked because they didnt think we would be compatable. Thats where I would feel defensive is about the best word I could describe it and be like "what did I do?".

 

I agree with you whole-heartedly in the example you give. I'd be a bit defensive too - and yeah, 'what did I do?' would definitely enter my mind.

 

That's not the message I was getting from some of the other replies to this thread, though. Maybe I read it wrong, but I was getting the message that someone they weren't interested in blocked them, and they thought it was rude. My point was, who cares? You rejected them first, right?

 

Now blocking someone you've never had any correspondence at all with is downright rude in my book.

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I noticed a lot of people online are very quick with the block button, not just on LS sites, but on forums, online games, blogs, etc. To me blocking is a last resort, but I've spoken to people who will hit it at a moments notice for anything.

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We will often block a profile if someone has blocked us for some reason. It's just easier that way so that they don't show up later in searches and such. We've been blocked many times for no apparent reason by people we've never even contacted. And I will admit we've used it on at least one occasion to block someone that we know through local social circles and have 0 interest in (to the point of not even wanting to see her -yes a single female- profile come up). I wish SLS would keep those you've blocked from showing up on the Random Member list on the front page.

 

It would also be nice if there was a way to add a note when you block a profile to remind yourself why you blocked it.

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Funny this comes up now but I was contacted on SLS by someone yesterday with an email reading just "are you on yahoo messenger". I thought that rather short so I replied with a "No". Then for curiosity I checked out there profile and there were no pictures and all the profile fields were simply "Fun Loving Couple Fun Loving Couple" or something like that in every field 'looking for, description and fantasies'. Now our profile clearly states that if you contact us as a couple please have photos of a couple and please no one line profiles. Then I got another message like two minutes later asking "what are your names and do we chat here?". I replied with only our initials figuring I'd be nice, then I thought about it and felt like were being trolled for some reason or another so I blocked them. I went back to check out their profile to see if they put pics up or added to their description and we were blocked in return. Oh well no love lost there, breath-in breath-out move-on. I guess one good block deserves another.

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I think that using the blocking tool as a form of bookkeeping a little on the harsh or rude side. We are on Swing Lifestyle and we only have a few people blocked for good reason. After some time you do forget about someone you have e-mailed or had a conversation with, so we use the "notes" feature and that reminds us about something for that particular profile. We use that for making notes on who doesnt reply to e-mails, or if their a smoker or not, that sort of thing.

 

We use the "show only...without notes" feature on the SLS search function to find prospective playmates we do not have notes on. I.e., those we haven't had contact with yet. Works well for us.

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The mail history and our memory are usually good enough for us to know why someone might get blocked...However that said on aff we only have 8 profiles in 3 years.. on sls it is a bit more but they are usually the " I am not a couple but a single male getting around the fact that you have all single males blocked but wanting to talk to you" type of profile. We report them and block them.. We have noticed we were blocked by a few people and we could not figure out why... but like with all things .... some are rude and some are mean and some are stupid... it is the way of the world...

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If you are a lifetime member of SLS (I don't know if this works if you are a paid member) you can designate level of interest in a profile without blocking it and it will not show up in your searches. I was surprised also when I checked my friends list one day and there were all of these blocked profiles. It seems that if you block someone, the system automaticly blocks them from you as well.

 

S

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If you are a lifetime member of Swing Lifestyle (I don't know if this works if you are a paid member) you can designate level of interest in a profile without blocking it and it will not show up in your searches.

S

 

 

If only it worked! In our default search I have it set not to show the ones we've marked as "not interested" yet it still does it. It's like I have to go in and manually reset that option every time I run the search (and even then it's iffy).

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Peachy, as we are moving to a new area I was planning on being a little more sophisticated in my searching. Oh well, it was worth a shot.

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We have blocked quite a few "single" males on SLS.. Mostly because they said they need discreet meetings during the day or tag lines that say something along the line of "Shhhhh, don't tell my wife" kinda stuff.

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If only it worked! In our default search I have it set not to show the ones we've marked as "not interested" yet it still does it. It's like I have to go in and manually reset that option every time I run the search (and even then it's iffy).

True, I read on one of their forums that there is a bug of some sort that when you use a saved search with the 'hide no-interest' checked it is not working. What you need to do is click on the 'edit' button for that particular saved search and check the 'hide no-interest' button again and select save and search. This always works for me. I understand they are working on it for like the last year. Now I wish there was a way to only search for people you marked as maybe interested or interested.

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When we first joined Swing Lifestyle, we were immediately blocked by 2 couples. We did some searching around to find out what it meant to be "blocked" (you know, that page that pops up)... and saw elsewhere that they "don't play outside their race". We are a mixed race couple, but neither of us is white. It kinda pissed us off since, although we we are open to all shapes, sizes, nationalities, and colors, after seeing them around in person, and on other sites, we would have had absolutely no interest in them anyway. Turns out they're not our type either, lol!

 

But still... Why would we message anyone who clearly states they're not interested in either of us?

 

People have their preferences, and we know what we are and aren't attracted to. That's a fact of life. But with this immediate blocking thing, it felt like they were saying, "You are beneath us and unworthy". I know, that may be irrational... but it's how we felt! :rollseye:

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People have their preferences, and we know what we are and aren't attracted to. That's a fact of life. But with this immediate blocking thing, it felt like they were saying, "You are beneath us and unworthy". I know, that may be irrational... but it's how we felt! :rollseye:

 

You're going to meet anal orifices (I'm trying to be diplomatic here :D ) in any group or community, and the swinging community is no different. It's sad, but it's reality. I think you were justified in feeling the way you did, but think of it this way - they saved you time, effort, and energy by letting you know that they're not up to your standards from the get-go. They actually did you a favor by proving to you that they're the ones who are unworthy.

 

We really don't care if someone blocks us. We figure they're people we wouldn't want to meet in the first place, so they've saved us from meeting them.

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You're going to meet anal orifices (I'm trying to be diplomatic here :D ) in any group or community, and the swinging community is no different. It's sad, but it's reality. I think you were justified in feeling the way you did, but think of it this way - they saved you time, effort, and energy by letting you know that they're not up to your standards from the get-go. They actually did you a favor by proving to you that they're the ones who are unworthy.

 

We really don't care if someone blocks us. We figure they're people we wouldn't want to meet in the first place, so they've saved us from meeting them.

 

What you've said is so true! It just kind of gave us a bit of a rude awakening for our first experiences on the site (it was immediate blocking lol). Now, we find it a laughable experience :) But it really did piss us off at the time it happened.

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We are not usually quick to block anyone but we do have a growing list. There are people we have declined multiple times that will not take "NO THANKS" for an answer. We have tried ignoring their messages and they still send more. One "gentleman" sent are very crude and explicit message to us about what he would like to do with and to the Mrs. We declined and told him what we thought of his message, he sent a pissed off follow up message about how we are the problem with the Lifestyle today and added a few personal attacks for good measure then blocked US. After that episode we just decline and if they are persistent the we block them.

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It would also be nice if there was a way to add a note when you block a profile to remind yourself why you blocked it.

 

SLS is a very simple program and is user friendly. It don’t have many extras that more advance programs have. There is sites of like nature that has contacts list, if you contact someone that you have made contact with before it will tell you the time, date and even the message that you sent and the replies. If SLS would just do some very simple upgrades they too can do the same thing. The SLS site is a good site and I can see why most of it is free. I been a member of SLS now for about 6 months both as a paid member and as a free member. I really don’t see a reason to be a paid member of a site just to see nude photos of someone who may be of interest to us or to get the very little extras that is offer to paid members. Now if SLS would improve and make the site more competitive with better features then maybe more free members would becomes paid members. Still we like the site and have added it to our list of sites that we are members of.;)

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What gets us really is when someone we have had no contact with us in any way...and it shows up that they blocked us ....

Until this thread I didn't even realize it worked that way. Now I've looked at my "Blocked" list and see four names. One is the couple who I referred to earlier who wrote to us and then blocked us when we politely declined -- twice. One is a profile whose name rings a bell but I don't remember why. Two names I don't recognize at all. I don't have a very thick skin, but it is thick enough that that just amuses me.

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According to our blocked list we've been blocked by a couple from FL. We've never even seen this profile before...

 

Something in our profile must have really offended them :)

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Until this thread I didn't even realize it worked that way. Now I've looked at my "Blocked" list and see four names. One is the couple who I referred to earlier who wrote to us and then blocked us when we politely declined -- twice. One is a profile whose name rings a bell but I don't remember why. Two names I don't recognize at all. I don't have a very thick skin, but it is thick enough that that just amuses me.

 

I once noticed that a couple that we used the automatic 'no thanks' response for showed up on our blocked list. I wonder if using the canned response automatically puts people on your blocked list or if this couple blocked us...

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We make notes for everyone we meet. People who have declined us and/or we've declined them. People that we will block are people that come off as being pushy and/or rude.

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