rushing to hook up

[JustAskJulie]

There's a big difference between looking to meet quick and the people who are looking to play tonight - the latter of which there are plenty. Those types go into the category of "bed post notchers" that you often see referred to. They aren't looking for friendships or anything other than just sex and since there are plenty of them out there they will find others who are looking for the same and all will be happy. Different strokes for different folks. When you get those kind of messages just reply with a "Thanks but we don't play that way".

[riswingcpl]

We've only done a "let's meet tonight" date once...and it turned out to be great. The other couple lived 5 minutes from us, and we ended up seeing them regularly for almost a year, until they moved down south. Most of the time though, last minute hookups are impossible for us because of family committments. If we do, it'll be for drinks not for sex that first time...unless, of course, there's one hell of a four-way attraction...

M

[ShellyM]

I don't know that we could do this, mainly because of our children and scheduling issues. Now, if we really clicked, or if they really turn us on physically I could....but this is more fantasy for us because we can't just drop the kids without planning.

[cuzzeyesaidso]

We would meet up right after an initial email or IM. We make it clear that it's not a promise of sex though. If we both like what we see then we're game. It's no different than going to a swing club or house party. You take a look at what's available to you at the moment and if you're interested, then go for it.

[GoodThingzCum]

No problem with MEETING for a drink soon....better than a LONG drawn out email saga with people who have no intention of meeting but like to pretend they do!


NO PROMISES made about playing...if it leads there fine...if not we had a drink and met new people who may one day introduce us to others....


DO have a problem with...LOOKIN TO PLAY TODAY

Chelle

[Tia Vampire]

i'm not a pushy person,but if a couple says they would like to get to know you better, why keep holding it off. meet and see if you get along. if not you can move on and find a better couple. just because you meet, does not mean you have to jump into bed. just hang out and see if it is worth while.
there is a couple that we would like to get to know better, but soon as it is time to meet, something comes up. so we have given up on this couple.

[Pepper & Drew]

We actually prefer to meet pretty soon after a few initial emails. We don't have children, so we can usually meet on fairly short notice. No sense in talking, and talking, and talking, and then meeting and there's no attraction, or finding that the pictures are 10 years old, or that one or both of the couple is an asshole or a bitch. If you meet early, you haven't invested a large portion of your time.

We're generally a no-play-on-the-first-date couple just because we usually like to be sure that we're both attracted. We're terrible at "secret signals" and more than once, we've ended up in some uncool situations because we didn't take the time to make sure we were both on the same page. Also, once we've had drinks, talked, loosened up a bit, it's too late to START playing (oh yeah, I'm an old lady ) Now, there have been times when we HAVE played upon the initial meeting, but over time we've realized that it's rarely been as fun as if we wait until we're not rushed.

Pepper

[clecouple]

I think I'm seeing this thread as more for online ads and chatting (wanting to play when couples first meet). But, my wife and I have a perspective of going to Swingers Clubs. 2 separate times we met a great couple while attending a Singers Club. It was a local drive for us and not the other couples. But after "hitting it off" and especially the other girl liking my wife we asked after talking to them for about 3-4 hours if they wanted to play. One couple said, "they just wanted to get away and take a drive." The other couple said basically the same thing. Now, we weren't getting the "brush off" as we saw neither couple playing with anybody else the rest of the night.

I'm not sure if they had "no playing on the first meeting" rule, but my wife feel that when you are at a Swingers Club wouldn't you expect to play even if it was with someone new? We can't figure out why someone would travel a few hours, pay the fee to get in and then just "hang out"! You could do that at a local bar or club and save a lot of money.

That's why we feel like going to a Swingers Club, because we are in the mood for some group playing and even if there isn't anybody we know there we would hope to meet some other horny couples to play with. My wife and I feel that because we are not "hardcore" Swingers and don't go every week to swing that people look at us different and it is harder to swing with us. Maybe that could be another "Thread"?

[Edison Carter]

Susan here: The proverbial 'Meet and Mate' experience. The bottom line is that some people move faster than others. The truth is, you have to tell people 'no' sometimes and not be bothered by their response to that. It takes all kinds. The key thing is don't tolerate badgeing or intimidation, just hang up the phone, close the IM window and move on.