Question: Are 20 somethings only wanting females?

[curious24]

Maybe I've asked this question before but I don't remember so I'm going to ask it for the first time or again

Something that I think I have noticed is that the 20 something couples out there seem to want to find either other couples or another women to join them. I never see any 20 something couples looking for a single male to join them.

My question is why is this? Does it have to do with their age? Society? I just don't get it.

I never see any 20 something couples looking for a single male to join them.

You have now

Although I am now 31 Mrs naughty is still in her 20s and we had are first MFM experiences when we were both in our 20s.

[Greg & Sheryl]

We can’t say we’ve noticed that trend. Then again, we are a couples-only couple that is well past our 20’s, so we are well out of that social circle. Still, we have a theory; perhaps many younger men have not developed enough confidence to be able to share their partners with other men without expecting to “get some” in return. It may take a few years of maturing to get to that point.

Another theory: perhaps many of the older men who share their partners do so only because age has reduced their sexual desire and their ability to perform. Thus they settle for sharing their partners, whereas younger men won’t settle for having anything less than another woman to play with.

DISCLAIMER: These theories are not intended to offend those younger men who do share their partners, or older men with strong sex drives who still perform well. These are merely generalizations which might explain curious24’s observation, and we would love to hear alternative theories.

[Spoomonkey]

Greg & Sheryl

We enjoy the MFM, but not because I have a decreased drive... Of course, I'm 35... That may be it for some, but not for us. I am a machine unto myself

I think you hit it on the head with the maturity aspect. I know that will ruffle a few feathers, but I think men are probably not as secure yet - and women are probably even less, so they go with another woman to please their man.

Of course - it is just conjecture and generalizations are always bound to lead to someone being upset, so I will co-opt your disclaimer and say that I seriously hope I haven't offended anyone. Just thinking out loud. There are always exceptions - especially since my theory is anything but a rule.

I do maintain that swinging is a sport for the middle aged...



Spoomonkey

[De and Ci]

We know a couple in their 20's who played with single guys. You just haven't met the right couple.

[gsmusic]

No, that's not totally true- we are in our twenties, and have no problem with mmf.

[adventureUS2]

The older U get the more secure with your relationships and sexuality you become
Another man is a hard pill to take for someone who is not ready for it.

[One By One]

we are in our 20's, although we have not been with any other partners yet, we are open to either a single male, a single female, or a couple, we aren't too picky

[leftcoastcouple]

Obviously we're just one couple and everyone is different, but we played with single guys when we were in our 20s--our early 20s, in fact. But then, we'd been together since high school, so maybe we were further along in the security and trust departments than many couples at that age might be.

Hell, if anything, the thought of Mrs. Leftcoast with a single guy was a bigger turn-on for me then than it is now. Not that it's not still a huge one--it is--but as I'm sure many guys who've hit 40 can relate to, I'm finding that things mellow a bit with age. So at this point, it's more of a slow burn than a crawling-up-the-walls kind of thing.

[curious24]

thanks for all the great replies

but if only 9 replies out of everyone here i think that would tell me that a lot of people in their 20's aren't really interested in single men?? maybe? hmm ...

[DavidandJess]

David and I are currently looking solely for a bifem ATM simply b/c we are very new (haven't had our first experience yet, actually) and as David is not sure yet as to his bi status yet(he thinks he may possibly be, but was raised VERY repressed sexually and up until our relationship had been with very allaboutme women so just since we've been together, and with a lot of love and patience and lots of questions asked of me he has learned that it is perfectly okay to unearth and examine that part of his life.. it's been beautiful to see him blossom.. ) a single man is something we are not ready to explore, and likely won't be for quite a while. A couple is something we are looking for after a few encounters, possibly as our first encounter if it is the right one.... that's our reasoning...

[tazzie_n_truck]

We are still considered 20 somethings, getting nearer to 30 somethings, but maily we have only looked for couples, there are times when we would like to find a single female to play with, not had too much luck there, but there are times we have invited a single guy to join us for a threesome, but they have also been guys that we know and trust.

Mainly for us, we look for couples who we can be friends with and hang out with and there not be the expectation that we have to swap partners and have sex every time we meet. But that's just us.

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by curious24

...if only 9 replies out of everyone here i think that would tell me that a lot of people in their 20's aren't really interested in single men??

Not necessarily. Although we haven’t conducted an official census on this board, we think it’s a safe bet that the majority of people on this board are over 30, and many of them didn’t start swinging until they were already 30. Thus, only a small percentage this board’s membership felt compelled to answer your question.

Still, it seems you actually received an above-average response. There are 25 threads listed on the first page of the General Swingers Stuff forum (not including the “About the…” thread). As of this writing, only nine of those threads, including this one, have received double-digit responses. In that context, it would seem that there is an interest in single men among 20-something couples. However, perhaps a poll on this topic would be a more accurate gauge.

[De and Ci]

Originally Posted by curious24

thanks for all the great replies

but if only 9 replies out of everyone here i think that would tell me that a lot of people in their 20's aren't really interested in single men?? maybe? hmm ...

I assume your in your 20's. Why don't you go find a girlfriend your age thats open to swinging-may take a little work but it will be worth it, and then ya'll can go out and look for a single guy. Then you can say your one of those couples in their 20's that look for single guys. Seriously, You got a lot of decent response from this thread-quit whining and take some action!

[HotMama]

Originally Posted by curious24

thanks for all the great replies

but if only 9 replies out of everyone here i think that would tell me that a lot of people in their 20's aren't really interested in single men?? maybe? hmm ...

I am 29, and my husband is 30....

Most single 20 year old Men in swinging are very, very, very immature and trying to go for the "easy lay".

But to answer your orig. question ... Single men are all over, single women are not..... You don't have to "look" for a single male.... they are all over.

If you want to "up" your odds, find a girlfriend and bring something more to the table. I am Bi, (that is the main reason we are in the lifestyle) a lot of the other women in the lifestyle are also..... You can not offer me nothing my husband does not.

Sounds like you are just complaning because you think its hard to find people to play with you......