Swingers in their 20's?

[inbeachcouple]

We started out when we were in our mid 20's. Now we're old and grey at 30.

[20ishCouple]

We are new to the site and we are also in our early 20's....He is 23 and I will be 22 next month. We are more comfortable with the thought of being with people around our own age....but have noticed that alot of the "swingers" are of an older age. We think its great to see such a diverse age group living this lifestyle....but wish we could find more people who are in their early to mid 20's who are just starting out....just for the added comfort. However, we would probably click better with people in a different age bracket because we have been together for 8 years come this April, just bought a house, no children yet...but we definately have our life in order, and our priorities straight. ( no offense to the younger crowd) Most younger people just aren't that settled in to life yet....they don't even know what they want. I agree that alot of times younger people are still in the " i just wanna experiment" stage. Anyhow. Good luck. Hope you find what you are looking for.

[gsu22]

I'm still wishing I could find people closer to me in age as well. Don't get me wrong, i've enjoyed everything to this point but I'd like to be with a young couple and see the differences, if any.

[ChrisandMia]

22/f and 27/m in west texas. the young ones are far few from what we can tell over here

[hotsummers]

We are an "older" couple, she in her mid 30's and I, well... a little older. We are both often mistaken for being much younger than we really are. I feel that age is something that you wear well or don't, much like clothes. We think young, act young and are not in a real big hurry to "mature." We are also young in life with young children.

When I was in my early 20's I would have cringed at the idea of swinging and thought it was perverted. But after living life fully since then, I feel that swingers are more enlightened than the rest of the general population. Something that would destroy the average couple (sex with others) only makes a swinging couple stronger and more in love. It takes a few years of life to be able to fully grasp such a concept. It also takes deep self confidence, something a lot of younger people have not developed yet. Hence the older crowd generally associated with swinging.

We would entertain younger couples because we would not feel self conscious about our looks or bodies. Others may not feel the same way.

[20ishCouple]

Thats Awesome HotSummers.

Very good way of looking at things. I think it's great that you all aren't ready to mature completely, and act young. Of course, I'm in My 20's and sometimes get told I act too mature...soo...lol. My mother is in her early 50's and she acts more my age than I do and I think it is very delightful to see so many people of an older generation, just enjoying life so freely.

Just thought I'd say Hey and tell ya that I think you guys sound like a wonderful couple.

~ R.

[DustyandSweety]

i'm 22 and hubby is 25

[confunktion]

I'm 29 and the Mrs. is 27. We started a few years ago, and I would say that in our area, the average age of those in the lifestyle skew a little higher, but only into the thirties. All ages are represented around here, though. It's a nice little blue-collar melting pot.

[stlffun]

Well, I can tell you that my ex and I started swinging BEFORE we were in our 20s. We started at age 19. We got married when we were 23 and remained swingers our entire marriage. We still play togetehr occasionally, but she moved several hundred miles away, so not so much any more. The swinging part of our lives was the one thing that stayed great the entire marriage and it had absolutley nothing to do with the split. Oh, by the way, we're both 44 now and still going strong! When we were younger, we partied with all ages of friends and still do!

[us2maybe]

I think that while younger couples aren't the majority they are in fact out there - and increasingly so. The reason however is simple why you probably don't find as many young couples. For one if someone practices what is swinging behavior male/female despite our "sexually liberated" generation the stigma of he/she sluts still exist - so many people who are probably interested otherwise, don't feel as comfortable...well maybe except guys cause' they're always horny.

However, I think that is changing now - and really the only reason why you tend to see older couples swing is because of : 1) comfort 2) trust and 3) sexual maturity.

Younger couples tend to be starting out with eachother, are new to one another and unless they make the concerted effort to express these specific issues tend to not feel comfortable expressing interest until they are older. Sometimes couples wait until they're older to "spice things up" sometimes they wait until they're older because they are growing with their partner and are more comfortable sharing those interest.

2) trust same thing. Trust takes a lot of time (especially the trust to allow someone else to play with your partner), and as we all to some degree struggle with our insecurities and jealousy issues - it takes time (years often) for couples to trust one another. Sometimes younger couples perhaps can deal quicker and it doesn't take years necessarily - but it definitely takes some time for them to full on swing, and by then they probably fall in the 30ish+ crowd you mentioned.

3) sexual maturity. You'll be quick to find many ready and willing single guys - in our age group because 1) the sexual double standards - but also because guys' sexual desire between the ages of 18-28 is bit more revved (though viagra has tweaked this a bit)than that of women who tend to reach the peak of their sexual desire/response towards their 30s/40s. Some point to the "biological clock" trying to beat menopause, they way belligerent drunks beat fellow patrons on "last call" - but I'm not so sure its just personal comfort moreso than biology since they're are probably PLENTY post-menopausal women who enjoy the lifestyle. But with the social and biological differences in male female sexuality the addage "You can only swing as fast as the slowest partner" may shed a bit more light since swinging usually takes place because the female partner actually is willing to at least try it. Sometimes she may be dragged and kicking, sometimes she does it for her partner, and sometimes she is acknowledging some of her own fantasies - but it really can't take place unless the female partner is comfortable enough with herself. And in their 20s a lot of young women may be comfortable with it themselves - but they may not feel comfortable sharing such with a partner they are unsure will be accepting of their desires - and still respect them as a partner.

Now that of course is not to say that women's sexual desire/responses necessarily aren't close to or higher than that of males in the 20ish age group - but the social double standard still exist for them and that can be a major deterrent to what society deems for women as "slutty" behavior.

[newcpl28]

hi we are 29 and 28 and started swing last summer.I guess we all do it for the fun and for the variety

[chris_&_nadine]

We are 24 and 26 just thinking about joining the lifestyle. We have some of the same concerns about being able to meet couples in our age group. Keep us posted as to how things turn out.

[scrying]

recently 26 myself (oh...god...business end of 30 is approaching....) and still would like to consider myself quite active, irrespective of the age situations....

[Pepper & Drew]

We've had no problem finding plenty of couples in our age group. I'm 28 and Drew's in his thirties, but 2 of the couples we play with are younger than me and all that we play with are within our same generational group.

Pepper

[KaseyS]

This is a really interesting topic to me, because im in my early 20s. I'm not currently in a relationship with anyone, so obviously Im not actually a swinger, just someone who's become kind of intruiged by the whole idea. Im brand new to this board, by the way. *s*

Im surprised that there are so many people in their 20s who are swingers. I posted in my introduction that the guys I've dated so far were very much the jealous type. I could never imagine any of them being swingers. Also, the girl friends I have look at relationships the same way. I dont think I could talk with them about the idea of swinging because they'd think i was VERY strange! Well, I live in a pretty small town and I'm sure people in other places are a little more openminded.

My idea was that people probably become much less jealous as they get older. Probably they just relax a little and aren't as insecure. Someone suggested that I post my own question about this and I probably will!