How young is too young??

[sereneiders]

I didn't took the time to read all the posts, but it's interesting to notice there's a trendset in the answers given by young people (in their twenties) and older ones.

I believe this have to do with what everyone perceive as "being mature enough". Most people, without caring of their ages (even if they're 15) would perceive themselves as "mature enough" to define and engage in any relationship (friendship or couple, it doesn't care), and as we grow up and get experience, we realize we are "more mature than before", and we're able to recognize people telling us they're "mature enough" when we've been there, and we were "less mature than what we actually are".

I believe there are an impotrant distinction between recreational sex and swinging, the later involves a relationship you threasure more than the fun you get from the recreational sex, so you want to preserve it from any negative side effect the recreational sex may have.

The value of the relationships someone have increases in time, a marriage is a building in which you invested time and life, and it may reach a point where you feel there's a point of no return to start over from the scratch with someone else, that you're not up to engage in such an effort (I believe for many couples that point of no return provides a safety ground where they may feel reasured enough as to start swinging).

And here brings up the rule about "never fuck with someone who have less to loose than yourself". It seems natural for a couple having 20 years of marriage to perceive a 1 year old marriage as people who have "less to loose" than themselves. Also, if it took years for them to develop the relationship to the poing of being able to swing, they may trend to perceive such a couple as "less mature" because they didn't spend the same time developing their relationship, and even when knowing they may not require the same level of "fine tuning" than the one their own marriage required.

So, there is no objective answer for this. You may say that most 18 years old guys and gals are just warming up and experimenting with their sexuality to shape it some way or another, and that they're in the middle of a proccess of learning on how to deal with their emotions since most of them just started engaging in social interactions without the parental support. All of this is true. And also that they may shape a sexuality and learn to deal with their emotions in a way more switable to become swingers later on.

Enganging in swinging at this stage may provide them experience that gives feedback to the learning procces in a way most couples engaging in swinging after learning from a "vanilla context" wouldn't be able to understand... as for the youngest to understand the problems these older couples had to face as to be able to swing.

So a better question would be about the differences swingers couples have from becoming swinger at the very early stages of their individual emotional developement, or after having developed it in a "vanilla" context from where some conceptions had to be changed in order to reach the same point.