Am i overreacting.

ktimephoenix · 06-30-2008, 10:29 AM

My best friend, we'll call her S (who is engaged, and i'm good friends with her fiance), and my brother, We'll call him D, have been chatting on MSN. they conspired to pull a prank on me, which involved D telling me that he was in love with S.

now while D and I are extremely close, the one thing he has never done, is come to me for girl advice. i would love him to, but he's never been comfortable. so for him to come to me with this, i felt was a big deal.

Anyway, he told me that he was in love with S, and assured me that while i probably thought he was joking, he was serious. he asked me how serious S and her fiance were, and if he thought he'd have a chance with her.

anyway, they admitted it was a joke after their plan fell through (they thought i'd tell S straight away, where she'd say that she was in love with D as well... but i would never betray D's secret like that).

they can't understand why i got angry with the two of them. 1. because it is a big deal to me that D would open up and talk to me about his feelings, and
2. i was under major stress at the THOUGHT of the potential sh!tstorm that was coming. i mean i didn't know whether i had to break my brothers heart, and try to talk him down from S, whether he was going to try to break up S and her fiance, or whether S would ditch her fiance for D (and i wouldn't want to do that to her fiance)...

am i over reacting? should i just have laughed (their attitude). what would you do in that situation? would you be angry too?

**Alura** · 06-30-2008, 11:27 AM

You are not overreacting. You have a right to be angry.

Life is difficult enough while dealing with the truth. A lie, simply to create drama, is the mark of a teenager. Tell your brother and "S" to grow up.

Mr. Alura

***JustAskJulie*** · 06-30-2008, 12:03 PM

Not over-reacting. Have you told D why you were so upset and how much it meant to you for him to come to you like that?

**LikeMinds321** · 06-30-2008, 12:31 PM

I don't think you are overreacting either.

If I was in your shoes I'd want to know why my brother and best friend thought this "joke" would be funny. Maybe after talking with them both they'll realize it was a stupid game on their part.

Hope you find out what was going through their minds.

LM

JustMrJ · 06-30-2008, 01:34 PM

I believe Mr. Alura has it pegged... too much drama in life to begin with. No need to create drama for fun.

That was a very immature 'joke' and I would have NOT found it funny in the least.

ktimephoenix · 06-30-2008, 08:35 PM

I haven't spoken to D yet. he lives interstate, and we get little time to talk as is, so i haven't had a chance to speak to him since i've calmed down.

I spoke to S about it, and she couldn't see WHY i was so upset. she thought i was over reacting. her words were "i could understand you acting like this if we kept it going for a couple of weeks"

I'm also not impressed that D told S about the negative things i said about S in an effort to "talk him down". i said nothing but the truth (she's attention seeking and high maintanence), and i've told her that before, but i still feel that D betrayed my trust in relaying that to her.

**fun4Ds** · 06-30-2008, 09:29 PM

I feel they played a bad joke on you, according to your side.

Why would they do that ?

Thats the question that would allow you to laugh with them. I hope you can someday, if its really in good humor.

Have you ever in the past, played a little joke on either of them ?

ktimephoenix · 06-30-2008, 11:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I feel they played a bad joke on you, according to your side.

Why would they do that ?

Thats the question that would allow you to laugh with them. I hope you can someday, if its really in good humor.

Have you ever in the past, played a little joke on either of them ?

i don't know why they did that. as i said, they have only really started chatting together in the last few weeks, so i don't even know how they interact together.

i try to keep my jokes positive. i.e. for my brothers 18th, i appologised that funds were tight, and all i could get him was a key chain knife that he wanted... when he unwrapped it, the keychain was attached to the keys of his first car. "nice" surprises i guess.

**fun4Ds** · 07-01-2008, 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ktimephoenix

i try to keep my jokes positive. i.e. for my brothers 18th, i appologised that funds were tight, and all i could get him was a key chain knife that he wanted... when he unwrapped it, the keychain was attached to the keys of his first car. "nice" surprises i guess

When you see your little brother.

Take your middle finger and flip him wright in the forhead for me.

That was stupid of him.

Your girl friend needs a spankin. That will have to be from the both of us.

Additude · 07-01-2008, 05:12 AM

Funny what comes out in dirty laundry. It can be upsetting.

I wonder what would make them dream up such a concoction? Could it be the thought of reality?

Remember, your actions and responses represent the person you want other people to identify you with. It's as big of a deal as you want to make of it.

Time to let it go. Let them off the hook.

They do understand and they will think twice before doing it again.

Know when your right, know when your wrong. You don't have to prove anything.

sweet_tna · 07-01-2008, 10:23 PM

I believe you have every right to be upset. Alura hit the nail on the head about there being enough drama in life without adding to it like that.

I would have a serious talk with your brother and BF and let them know how that joke of theirs made you feel. Hopefully, they'll come to understand the immaturity of what they did.

In the meantime, I can't help but wonder what made them think this was funny . . . and why are they chatting anyway . . .?

=)

ktimephoenix · 07-02-2008, 02:18 AM

It's not my partner that pulled this. it is just a good friend of mine. they chat because they both have nothing better to do with their time through the day.

prettylady · 07-08-2008, 09:45 AM

Love is a fragile thing to begin with. I don't think it is funny to joke about being in love with anyone. What if thier joking got to the boyfriend? If there wasn't a heads up about it in the first place he could have been seriously hurt by this.
Does the boyfriend know about thier chatter on the computer? how does he feel about it? What they see as just chatting others may see as potential for something else.
Sorry for the situation you have found yourself in.
Not cool on your friend and brothers part.
Your friend,
Prettylady

cupl4fun · 07-08-2008, 10:19 PM

"In the meantime, I can't help but wonder what made them think this was funny . . . and why are they chatting anyway . . .?"

Gotta agree with Sweet_tna on this part. Why are they chatting anyway?

lovinher · 07-09-2008, 09:18 AM

If somebody pulled that on me, my first thought would be that they were gauging my reaction and the reason isn't hard to figure out. I think you will find out soon enough if it was a joke or not.

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06-30-2008, 10:29 AM	#1 (permalink)
ktimephoenix Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 209 Location: Adelaide Australia Status: Couple	Am i overreacting. My best friend, we'll call her S (who is engaged, and i'm good friends with her fiance), and my brother, We'll call him D, have been chatting on MSN. they conspired to pull a prank on me, which involved D telling me that he was in love with S. now while D and I are extremely close, the one thing he has never done, is come to me for girl advice. i would love him to, but he's never been comfortable. so for him to come to me with this, i felt was a big deal. Anyway, he told me that he was in love with S, and assured me that while i probably thought he was joking, he was serious. he asked me how serious S and her fiance were, and if he thought he'd have a chance with her. anyway, they admitted it was a joke after their plan fell through (they thought i'd tell S straight away, where she'd say that she was in love with D as well... but i would never betray D's secret like that). they can't understand why i got angry with the two of them. 1. because it is a big deal to me that D would open up and talk to me about his feelings, and 2. i was under major stress at the THOUGHT of the potential sh!tstorm that was coming. i mean i didn't know whether i had to break my brothers heart, and try to talk him down from S, whether he was going to try to break up S and her fiance, or whether S would ditch her fiance for D (and i wouldn't want to do that to her fiance)... am i over reacting? should i just have laughed (their attitude). what would you do in that situation? would you be angry too?

06-30-2008, 11:27 AM	#2 (permalink)
Alura T-Town Playmates Join Date: May 2001 Posts: 6,122 Location: Tulsa, Oklahoma Status: Married to Mrs. Alura	Re: Am i overreacting. You are not overreacting. You have a right to be angry. Life is difficult enough while dealing with the truth. A lie, simply to create drama, is the mark of a teenager. Tell your brother and "S" to grow up. Mr. Alura __________________ "They may call me a rube and a hick, but I'd a lot rather be the man who bought the Brooklyn Bridge than the man who sold it." —Will Rogers

06-30-2008, 12:03 PM	#3 (permalink)
*JustAskJulie* Your Hostess Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 22,248 Location: Alabama Status: Female SLS Name:swingersboard Blog Entries: 59	Re: Am i overreacting. Not over-reacting. Have you told D why you were so upset and how much it meant to you for him to come to you like that?

06-30-2008, 12:31 PM	#4 (permalink)
LikeMinds321 Let's get comfortable... Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 8,542 Location: On the couch Status: Married to Mr LM	Re: Am i overreacting. I don't think you are overreacting either. If I was in your shoes I'd want to know why my brother and best friend thought this "joke" would be funny. Maybe after talking with them both they'll realize it was a stupid game on their part. Hope you find out what was going through their minds. LM

06-30-2008, 01:34 PM	#5 (permalink)
JustMrJ Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 337 Location: San Mateo, CA Status: M. Male SLS Name:JustMrandMrsJ	Re: Am i overreacting. I believe Mr. Alura has it pegged... too much drama in life to begin with. No need to create drama for fun. That was a very immature 'joke' and I would have NOT found it funny in the least. __________________ My opinion is just that... take it or leave it. Enjoy the "Now" nothing else exists.

06-30-2008, 08:35 PM	#6 (permalink)
ktimephoenix Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 209 Location: Adelaide Australia Status: Couple	Re: Am i overreacting. I haven't spoken to D yet. he lives interstate, and we get little time to talk as is, so i haven't had a chance to speak to him since i've calmed down. I spoke to S about it, and she couldn't see WHY i was so upset. she thought i was over reacting. her words were "i could understand you acting like this if we kept it going for a couple of weeks" I'm also not impressed that D told S about the negative things i said about S in an effort to "talk him down". i said nothing but the truth (she's attention seeking and high maintanence), and i've told her that before, but i still feel that D betrayed my trust in relaying that to her. Last edited by ktimephoenix : 06-30-2008 at 08:38 PM.

06-30-2008, 09:29 PM	#7 (permalink)
fun4Ds Julie's Helper Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 2,955 Location: Indiana. Status: couple SLS Name:mrmrsfun Blog Entries: 15	Re: Am i overreacting. I feel they played a bad joke on you, according to your side. Why would they do that ? Thats the question that would allow you to laugh with them. I hope you can someday, if its really in good humor. Have you ever in the past, played a little joke on either of them ? __________________ well... at least we are normal pervs

07-01-2008, 05:12 AM	#10 (permalink)
Additude Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2002 Posts: 310 Location: OBX-NC	Re: Am i overreacting. Funny what comes out in dirty laundry. It can be upsetting. I wonder what would make them dream up such a concoction? Could it be the thought of reality? Remember, your actions and responses represent the person you want other people to identify you with. It's as big of a deal as you want to make of it. Time to let it go. Let them off the hook. They do understand and they will think twice before doing it again. Know when your right, know when your wrong. You don't have to prove anything. __________________ If you want something you have never had before, you must do something you have never done before.

07-01-2008, 10:23 PM	#11 (permalink)
sweet_tna Being good is overrated Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 2,920 Location: Poconos, PA Status: The boss of Mr. Sweet SLS Name:Sweet_tna	Re: Am i overreacting. I believe you have every right to be upset. Alura hit the nail on the head about there being enough drama in life without adding to it like that. I would have a serious talk with your brother and BF and let them know how that joke of theirs made you feel. Hopefully, they'll come to understand the immaturity of what they did. In the meantime, I can't help but wonder what made them think this was funny . . . and why are they chatting anyway . . .? =) __________________ I'd rather go to hell for doing something I enjoyed than die wondering what it's like.

07-02-2008, 02:18 AM	#12 (permalink)
ktimephoenix Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 209 Location: Adelaide Australia Status: Couple	Re: Am i overreacting. It's not my partner that pulled this. it is just a good friend of mine. they chat because they both have nothing better to do with their time through the day.

07-08-2008, 09:45 AM	#13 (permalink)
prettylady anything boys can do.... Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,751 Location: Utopia Status: Trouble maker SLS Name:playtoys69 Blog Entries: 1	Re: Am i overreacting. Love is a fragile thing to begin with. I don't think it is funny to joke about being in love with anyone. What if thier joking got to the boyfriend? If there wasn't a heads up about it in the first place he could have been seriously hurt by this. Does the boyfriend know about thier chatter on the computer? how does he feel about it? What they see as just chatting others may see as potential for something else. Sorry for the situation you have found yourself in. Not cool on your friend and brothers part. Your friend, Prettylady __________________ To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

07-08-2008, 10:19 PM	#14 (permalink)
cupl4fun Breaking Barriers Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 270 Location: west texas Status: couple SLS Name:cupl4funluvn	Re: Am i overreacting. "In the meantime, I can't help but wonder what made them think this was funny . . . and why are they chatting anyway . . .?" Gotta agree with Sweet_tna on this part. Why are they chatting anyway? __________________ Screw You Guys. I'm Goin' Home. Cupl4fun

07-09-2008, 09:18 AM	#15 (permalink)
lovinher Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 763 Location: cleveland area Status: married to lovinhim SLS Name:Lovinall	Re: Am i overreacting. If somebody pulled that on me, my first thought would be that they were gauging my reaction and the reason isn't hard to figure out. I think you will find out soon enough if it was a joke or not. __________________ I know I was born. I know that I'll die. The in between is mine. (PJ)

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