Vanilla Wedding Gift Ideas

[intuition897]

Hi all.

Mr. and I have been invited to his cousin's wedding (on our anniversary date no less :rollseyes ). I hate giving gifts that don't have any thought put into them, and I'm looking for some interesting ideas. I figured if there was a place to look for ideas on what to give a newly married couple just starting out in life, this would be the place. I've only met his cousin a few times and haven't yet met his cousin's fiance. I don't think Mr. has even met her. I was thinking about putting together an heirloom recipe book with a few starter recipes. I started one the same month I was married almost 11 years ago with handwritten recipes that were handed down from my mom, grandmother and great-grandmother. I'm hoping to pass it on to my daughter for her wedding. Maybe that's kinda lame? We are NOT going to give them a honeymoon care package with lube and toys, etc. I'm looking for something meaningful/memorable/useful.

I almost hate going to vanilla weddings anymore. Mr and I just hold hands and catch one another's eye as the couple is saying their vows. They have such high hopes, and it's almost sad because you KNOW that 9 times out of 10, that couple standing up there in front of the altar have absolutely no idea what they're getting themselves into. They have no idea what lies in wait for them, and how 'real' their life is going to get. And the cards are stacked against them if they really believe that passionate romantic love is all they're going to need. Kinda like watching the happy couple rushing off in the getaway car, so blissful and happy, and knowing that 5 miles down the road, the bridge is out. And you hope and pray that a) they know how to swim, and b) they're smart enough to lose the dress and tux and all the rest of the frivolous non-necessities before they try to, 'cause if they don't, they're going to drown.

So... What shall we get for the happy couple? Any suggestions?

[jojodom]

first get yourself a drink and relax, don't worry about it.

The only other thing I am going to say is that 50% of all marriages fail, that stat is straight across the bored race, creed, nationality, etc. so I would save the heirloom stuff for your daughter that way you know someone you love will keep it and not get lost in translation during a divorce. Not being negative just repeating the stats. I am a stats guy.

The thing I get every one for a wedding present is a book on sexual positions, porn, and a vibrator. so here is start.

ohh, someone gave my wife and I a bunch of cleaning products when we go married and my wife loved it, another thought.

[northindycpl]

I have had a lot of compliments and praise on an interesting gift we have given in the past. The best thing about this gift is that you can align the pricing to fit your budget, depending on the quality of items you give.

There is a german tradition of giving specific christmas ornaments that are symbols of begining a life together. (you can look up the tradition on google and get the entire list)

The ones we give are:

A heart - Symbolizes Loving forever
A Bluebird- Symbolizes Hope for a bright Future
A house- Symbolizes Security for family

That seems to be a good start, and if we really like the couple we will add more. I have found that most quality gift stores have these ornaments in silver which look really elegant and attach a card explaining the symbols to them. Each year they can add another one for eachother, or it makes a good gift for you to add every year on their anniversary or christmas.

There are a total of 9 ornaments in the tradition.


I think it would be neat to give them your recipe book, too. I think I would add with it a really pretty baking dish, wooden spoons, maybe a tablecloth and napkins. or something that gives them a start of what they need. It would be neat if you had your cousins favorite recipe in the book and you could highlight that one.

[starlinn]

I like to get some nice wine glasses and a bottle of wine for the couple.
I went to a wedding last weekend and the couple had an actual "America's Funniest Home Videos" moment:
When the couple were saying their vows, you could tell that the groom was very nervous. He was smiling ear to ear and saying his vows very loud. When it came to saying "lawfully wedded wife" he said "awfully wedded wife" Everyone laughed outloud, and wow was his face red. He kept apologizing to his new wife...

[BiDrywallChick]

Lets see.. one gift I got at my first wedding was a laundry basket full of stuff needed to set up a new house. Laundry soap, dish soap, a large pot and a skillet, kitchen towels ect ect stuff that in general isnt thought about until after you get home. Save the keepsake stuff for your daughter. You dont know your cousin well. You can also get them picture frames for thier wedding pics.. a collage type. I personally have always prefered money or a gift card. I know it sounds less personal.. but then I dont have to think about it. Sears is always good for newlyweds.. or Walmart. Wine glasses, cheese plate and a nice bottle of wine is good, if they drink. A Betty Crocker cookbook and a basket of spices is also a good one.

[CandTinLorainCo]

hmmm... Sentimental stuff, people you don't really know, sounds lie a engraved mantel clock or plaque with the names, wedding date somthing that they will keep on a entertainment center or fireplace or hung up on the wall but will see usually everyday and remember its from you and it will comemorate thier blessed day.
I think hierlooms go to your direct line of family(ie: daughter,son) not to cousins and such plus in this time of marriages if i truley felt i wanted to give them one, i would wait till say 10th anniversary then give it.

-C

[Rombi's Girl]

If they are anything like us, they have been living together for quite a while and have most everything that they need for the house. I am surprised that they didn't have a gift registry, most couples do these days. But if in doubt on gift ideas, call the bride or groom's mothers or sisters, they will best know what the couples needs and/or wants. If you want to go on your own instead of asking for their help, I'd go with candles. Lots of candles and maybe a CD (music or $$) If you want to, maybe you could include a note or card saying that the candles can 'light the way to romantic times' or something.

I love candles. I have seen some that have names and dates on them. I have even seen one that had the couples invite stuck to the outside of the candle as a keepsake. Maybe you can find a place that does that.

Good luck,
RG

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by intuition897

I almost hate going to vanilla weddings anymore. Mr and I just hold hands and catch one another's eye as the couple is saying their vows. They have such high hopes, and it's almost sad because you KNOW that 9 times out of 10, that couple standing up there in front of the altar have absolutely no idea what they're getting themselves into. They have no idea what lies in wait for them, and how 'real' their life is going to get. And the cards are stacked against them if they really believe that passionate romantic love is all they're going to need. Kinda like watching the happy couple rushing off in the getaway car, so blissful and happy, and knowing that 5 miles down the road, the bridge is out. And you hope and pray that a) they know how to swim, and b) they're smart enough to lose the dress and tux and all the rest of the frivolous non-necessities before they try to, 'cause if they don't, they're going to drown.

So... What shall we get for the happy couple? Any suggestions?

May I suggest a Smith and Wesson .357 Magnum, and 2 rounds of hollow-point ammunition?

Jeesh...

[couplefromma]

Why not a picnic basket with two wine glasses and a nice bottle of wine like Starlinn suggested. Maybe with some candles, etc. Nice romantic gift. Maybe get the glasses etched with their last initial.

I agree with Rombi that they are probably already living together and have most of what they need for their home.

[Vespertine]

Everyone LOVES Money.

All newlyweds want money. It truly is the best gift to give at a wedding. Especially if you don't know the couple all that well.

[ohcpl43952]

For him, a tool kit. Nice to have good tools to fix things around the newlywed house. And for her, a subscription to Cosmo.

[intuition897]

Originally Posted by jojodom

first get yourself a drink and relax, don't worry about it.

The only other thing I am going to say is that 50% of all marriages fail, that stat is straight across the bored race, creed, nationality, etc. so I would save the heirloom stuff for your daughter that way you know someone you love will keep it and not get lost in translation during a divorce. Not being negative just repeating the stats. I am a stats guy.

The thing I get every one for a wedding present is a book on sexual positions, porn, and a vibrator. so here is start.

ohh, someone gave my wife and I a bunch of cleaning products when we go married and my wife loved it, another thought.

My husband is a stats guy, too. I guess I'm just sentimental.

[intuition897]

I think I was a little misunderstood about the heirloom recipe book idea. I'm not going to give away the original, just get them set up with a new one with a few starter copies of favorite recipes, some handwritten recipes from his cousin's mom & grandmother, a nice binder to put them in, page protectors and an explanation of the 'heirloom recipe' idea.

Mrs. Indy, that was a great idea! That's kind of what I was talking about; something simple, meaningful, unusual, and useful. Thanks for all the helpful suggestions, all! Although I'm not sure about the gun laws up here JnCC..

[SluttyWife]

There's a great book called "I Married Adventure" out there that you might pick up at Powells.com or eBay. It has a very kewl zebra print cover. Hardback. Vintage feel. Obviously out of print.
It's not a sex manual
by any means but it puts a very upbeat, fun spin on what a brand new couple might be in for. Kind of a "tongue-in-cheek" sorta way of saying "marriage isn't the end of our relationship as we know it." You might want to pack it in with another gift like a martini, sake or vodka set.

I've given this as a gift a few times. Very well received! ;-*

[Gorgegon]

Hello,

You may think this is a bit crazy but about four or five years ago a cousin of mine got married and my wife and I decided to give them as their wedding present an urn ( got it from funeral home) , with their names and the well known phrase “till death do us part” engraved.
For my wife and I, this is how we live our marriage every day, there is NO way out to our marriage but death. By thinking that divorce is never a solution to any of our problems, forces us live every day wanting to improve our relationship, if we ever start to harm each other and get in to a negative cycle we immediately talk and share our feelings and re-focus on the road ahead which we hope will be a very long one. There is not a problem that big that can we can’t find a win-win solution.
This gift will be meaningful, memorable and useful , they will forget most of the other wedding gifts received, but this one they will remember specially when they get older, and the older they become the will thinking about the use of it more often, just keep in mind to get a big enough urn to fit the ashes of both souls. Probably by now you are thinking that our last name is Adams, but just to let you know that in Mexico the day of the dead is a celebration that takes palce November 1 the same day they got married, so It didn’t feel that strange to give a gift like this.

It’s only an Idea.