Ice Breaker for First "Date"

[ohash01]

As some of you may have read, I went shopping last weekend with the F of another couple we've been talking to. We wanted to hang out first, do something completely NOT swingish, and see if we got along well, then if we did all 4 of us could get together. She and I had a great time! We have picked Friday night for all 4 of us to get together.

Here is my question...what shall we do?

None of us are big bar/club people. We're kind of leaning towards staying in. But that's as far as we've gotten. J. and I don't even own any board games.... This is very much a no pressure no rushing situation, so we're really just looking for something more on the fun side and less on the sexual side, but with a little flirty thrown in. Perhaps a "get to know you" kind of game? Do they make those? I've heard the game "Boxers or Briefs?" can be pretty funny, but I'm not quite willing to drop $25 if I don't get another review on it.

Any ideas/suggestions?

[phishfan]

Anxious to hear how it goes. We're working on trying to meet up with another couple soon as well and I'm not sure where things will go.

Good luck! Sorry I have no advice, but I'm really interested to hear what everyone suggests. Are the people you're hanging out with more experienced than you?

[JustAskJulie]

Read through some of the older posts in here, there are several that have been mentioned. There's one I've mentioned a few times but I can't remember the name of it off the top of my head. You can also try for a simple game of truth or dare (whether you make it up yourself or buy the cards with the truths and dares already made for you), it's a great way to allow for some simple flirts and at the same time allow you all to get to know each other better.

[frankmckinley]

A drinking game would loosen a few inhibitions. However, don't drink too much. I'm lucky ... something in me automatically let's me know when to stop. And at that level, is the perfect level. Slightly intoxicated, not shy, but sober enough to have 99% of my wits, coordination to make another person happy/satisfied. It works great when the other party (parties) have that kind of control too.

- Frank

[crazy4u]

I have to agree I find it very hard when the evening is planned to go to a couples home. You are there for a reason, but it always seem so ackward at first, trying to get comfortable and then let things flow as you would like. We have done the home thing a few times and there is always that feeling "ok who is going to start" or "how do we start". I could use all the advice that is offered. Friday we are going to a couples for home for an evening of play and I'm nervous, not nervous that I want to not go, just nervous about it starting. I find that when you first meet at a bar/club it just seems to flow abit easier, but I want to change that and start to enjoy the private house parties....help.

[Menage_a_Trois]

Well there is just a good ole' fashion game of strip poker or pool if you have a pool table.....but there are these wonderful little dice called dirty dice or love dice..... they always help break the ice to get things going.

Hope that helps.

The Other Mrs. Menage

[ohash01]

J. and I sat down and talked when I got home from work today and my bubble was burst just a teeny bit. He said he was feeling like this was a little too "contrived". I mean...I think that's kind of the nature of the beast. He described our last MFM as being "spontaneous, lighthearted, fun", which it WAS...but it was with his best friend. There was no need to get to know him, and do the strained small talk and socialization first. I asked if he wanted to cancel, he said "no...they seem like nice people we'd want to hang out with."

So, they are still coming over, however, I think this will probably end up being a hanging out, no play night. Which is fine with me, I'm good at moving slow. Plus, even though I've met the F and hung out with her, and chatted online with the M, I have yet to MEET the M...there may be no chemistry at all between me and him. But I'm still wondering what to do. Haha. HELP! It's tomorrow!!

Most of all, I'm worried about what J. and J. (the 2 men) will have in common. They're both computer nerds (meant in the most affectionate way possible), so that's a start...but after that?

[JoeB]

We met a couple on-line that wanted to go slow and cautious, not so much because of lack of experience as some bad experiences. We met for dinner the first time, knowing it would go any further that night. We had a great time and agreed to meet again. Believe or not, we went on a picnic in the middle of the day and really got to know each other. The third time was the charm! Had dinner, went to their home and had some of the most open and fun sex we had have ever had on the first time. facelick
As a result we are very good friends, not just swing partners. The female half of the other couple had some knee surgery, so fun and games were out for a short while. So today we took a drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway and really enjoyed ourselves.
By taking it at their pace, we had made good friends in and out of bed.

[prettylady]

TWISTER ANYONE?
Sorry, I played that game this weekend with my kids and had a blast. It seemed no matter what move was made I always ended up with my sons butt in my face. He thought that was funny as hell.
If it was a swinging situation and I had a nice butt near my face, male or female, I would give it a big bite. Then they would fall and I would be closer to winning.
Its how you play the game and weather you win or lose.
Your friend,
Prettylady

oh don't over think it or you will stress out and not be able to have fun.
Just relax and have fun. talking over a glass of wine can lead to one heck of a good joke and a good laugh.
I love to laugh it comes easy to me. It should come easy to everyone, if only we all stop taking ourselfs so seriously.

[nicecpl89511]

What we find to be a wonderful "icebreaker" and very inexpensive is to create your own game with the other couple(s). Take 2 dice of different colors (ours are red and green). One die is an action and the other is a body part. The couples aqree on the values of the die...a one on the red die might be "kiss" and the two on the green die might be "back of the neck"...certain numbers might call for an additional action...if a total of 3 or 4 is rolled one has to remove an article of clothing...snake-eyes(a one and a one) or box cars (six and a six) could call for additional action(s)...removal of a piece clothing and a long lingering kiss...

We like to add to the dice game with "action cards". We take index cards and the couples agree on what action is on the card...such as "tell us your most embarrassing sex encounter" or funniest or best, etc. "go into the other room with the person of your choice for five minutes"...One is only limited by their imagination. Designing the game is fun, usually accompanied by laughter...everyone loosens up. Also by agreeing on the dice values and the card actions...limits are set. It has been our experience that at times we rewrite the values to make the game more risque. The cards can be marked as M or F or can be in a single stack with the "action" face down. When you draw a card is, again, set by the rules the couples agree upon. For instance, one draws a card if he or she rolls a seven.

One should know the odds of rolling a particular number (such as a 1 and a 3).

It helps to have wine with the design and playing of the game.

odds can be found at

http://casinogambling.about.com/libr...y/aa052499.htm

I hope that this is helpful...

Wanda