Guilt? Did someone say guilt? Ahhh...the friend and constant companion of many of us.
Yeah, tryit2, I think guilt is something that many of us currently share or have shared in the past. A few, like LikeMinds, has managed to put their guilt into perspective and/or rationalize the guilt, and get on with life. But like all things in swinging and in life, we each move at our own pace.
Guilt can be a good thing. It stops us from jumping into things we might later have regrets about - gives us time to stop and think - as your wife is doing. I'm single, so my "guilt trips" are a bit different than those a married woman might have, but something I think most women have in common is the "good girls don't" aspect. That is something that is difficult to overcome considering the number of years we are subjected to that thought and societies attitudes towards "girls that do." At some point, tho', many of us have come to the conclusion that we have changed...just like society has.
There is a website I've seen referenced several times and the one I believe Alura is referring to - Liberated Christians. I've never read the information, but others have highly recommended it. You might want to check that out. Hopefully someone will come along and post the link. Otherwise, try a google search.
In the meantime, I'd suggest you do what you are doing...lots of talk, lots of reading, lots of fantasy...and start slowly by reading ads together, reading this board together. Maybe a visit to a club with the understanding there will be no play...just good conversation and observation. That may give you the opportunity to meet others in the lifestyle and to come to the understanding they are no different than you...just like your friends and neighbors...a mixed bag of nuts! It's easy for some of us to say, "Don't feel guilty." But since we all internalize guilt differently, and manifest that guilt differently, we all have to arrive at our own conclusions about what it means to us and how we will handle it. Or even dispense with it altogether.
Go slow. Read and learn.
- EBF
