[wrnakedru]

Can't help but wonder if we've got two couples here who have been so extraordinarily blessed that they have never before run into this kind of situation. That would be so unusual.

I would think anyone who meets folks utilizing on-line profile ads has meet those who were different in some way than they either presented themselves to be - or were perceived by the reader to be. Sometimes this is good news, sometimes it is not.

It is far more disagreeable when you meet those whose photos are, although theirs, from as much as ten years ago. Sometimes the change has been so great, it is difficult to believe they are the same people. Now in that instance, it isn't really an outright lie as the photos are of them - but then again, not what you might have been expecting to see. And that may have been a large part of the attraction you felt.

Likewise a couple who bills themselves as "soft swap" who gets contacted by another of the same category. Yet when met in person, confess they really prefer full swap - and list themselves as they do as they find the expectations are not so difficult. Well, for those who truly only want soft swap - this can be disturbing. And since the other's preference is really for full swap, it would seem for both parties a bit more email or phone discussion could have covered the areas of possible differences.

As Mrs. O stated, the acceptance of male bisexuality is an uncertainty at best - even within the so-called wide open acceptance of lifestyle choices that swinging is supposed to be. I do see ads that are forthcoming on the category, but know of many others who do not mention it in their profiles. I believe the activity with those is on an infrequent basis, and not the sole objective of their activities.

I would think that those who desire any certain category of activity to be considered MANDATORY in their playtime are going to include that information in their profile.

We have found that their are many factors about folks that are not included in a general profile listing. The onus then falls to the reader; if there are "deal busters" for you - you owe to yourself to list the "no-no's" in your profile. If you don't, perhaps you should ask the necesswary questions prior to meeting with a couple.

If you didn't ask about something that is of crucial importance to you, shame on you. Responsibility is a two-way street. Don't attempt to absolve yourselves by pointing fingers at others who are guilty only of allowing you the opportunity to make new friends, and perhaps expand your own horizons along the way. If you do not subscribe to a level of activity, no one forces your participation.

Give credit for information being shared once personal contact was made. You were allowed the opportunity to make a decision and choice for yourselves.

If you cannot at least on a social level accept those who vary in some way from yourselves, perhaps you should re-examine your own profile's self description. Does it include "open minded"?