Hi,I am new here and am not active in swinging just yet
But if I may suggest that Jealousy and Guilt go hand in hand,which is why a lot of people seem to dwell on the Jealousy.If you look at those emotions Guilt usually comes from the feeling that you have done something wrong.Jealousy comes from the fear that either someone else has/may do something wrong,or from the fear of self-inadequacies.Now you said you both feel guilty about swinging,you during and her after.Maby the best thing for you both to do is to figure out what is causing the Guilt,like what thoughts are going through your heads when you feel guilty,and then bring it out first.If you two can rationalize the basis of and the thoughts that make you feel guilty,it should take care of both problems at the same time