We agree fully with the previous comments. Unless you are both completely comfortable with what you are doing the swinging lifestyle is not for you. There has to be a very high level of trust between you to ensure that your sexual encounters with other partners do not put your marriage at risk. This can only be achieved in our view after a deep discussion in which you both agree on the parameters of your relationship and how far you are prepared to go in sharing yourselves sexually with others. We have found that swinging has enhanced our marriage enormously and our own sexual relationship has grown through the physical pleasure we have had not only in experiencing sex with a variety of partners but also from the visual joy of seeing each other having and enjoying sex with other people. This would not have been possible if we did not have complete trust in each other and the confidence of knowing that nothing we might do would be a threat to our marriage.
Any guilty feelings we might have had were before we started to swing. We had both had affairs and were fed up with the secrecy and furtiveness which went with them. After we started swinging our interest in having a variety of partners was out in the open, we were both aware of what the other was doing and all feelings of guilt disappeared very quickly.
So we suggest you step back for a while and discuss the state of your relationship and where you want it to go in the future before you venture out into the swinging world again. We wish you all the best - please do not do anything to put your relationship at risk.
Brian and Jo
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