Quote:
Originally posted by EternallySingle
Seriously, getting the same response ("we don't play at home because we have children", "we'd like to meet you. Whats your phone number?") in every email is almost like saying I should be so grateful someone wrote to me first that I shouldn't use any common sense and tell them everything.
...I just wanted to know if I was being a little to defensive or narrow minded in the people I decided to contact. I need to feel as safe as the couples I meet. Actually, in my opinion, I need to feel safer and less apprehensive than the average couple would because I don't have anyone to reassure me and when the lights go out, I don't have anyone to watch my back. |
The Libra side of my personality is taking over here, ES, being able to see it from both sides.
Yes, in some respects, I think you are being a tad defensive when you consider the vast numbers of comments we've seen from couples that have such a hard time separating the "real" single men from the players. If you consider the numbers of responses they get from singles, you might be able to see that they want to really verify you are "for real" rather than wasting a bunch of time on those that aren't. And the same holds true for those that contact you...they want to know. If you are all you say you are, you are definitely in the minority.
The other thing...you want to do the amusing e-mail bit for a time, and can't say that I blame you a tad...getting to know people and such...but again...are they sitting there thinking, "Another single man (or married man) taking up our time with no real intent."
Now the other side...yep and absolutely...you have every right in the world to feel safe and secure and to want to get to know people as much as anyone else does. That is likely the exception for a single man rather than the rule, and as such, people may not quite no how to respond. But with that attitude, and one that I certainly find preferable, comes the risk of people getting bored with the e-mail stuff. A decision you have to make...is it worth the risk of losing contact or them losing interest?
The thing about the cell phone...not a bad idea...you can't be traced too far with that in most cases although it isn't fail safe. Say a Verizon phone number...and I have a friend working for Verizon that has access...Bingo! Saw something similar happen right here in my neighborhood. That said...there will always be inherent risk in all we do from the moment we open our eyes each morning. We have to learn to weigh the risk.
But you know...generally (
and I said "generally") you can get an idea of the type of person/people you are dealing with from the basis of their ad and the first e-mail. If that sounds good, and you respond, you might want to say in your first response exactly, in part, what you said here. Most anyone can appreciate those thoughts.
- EBF
