I just had to add my two cents worth. The main reason is because I am going through the same thing. I never have a problem when it is just me and my wife, but add another couple and watch it shrink. I never have trouble with oral sex, but as soon as the latex comes out the trouble begins. I think part of it is because my wife and I never use condoms so they are actually new to us and the rest is what everybody else has mentioned, tired, alcohol, stage fright, and then the ultimate evil-trying too damn hard. I have been lucky, the 3 couples that we have been with (in a row) the ladies were very supportive and seemed not to mind, so the pressure was all self made and unneccessary. Just what ever you do, don't give up. I did find one thing that works...go about a week with no sex...(no not even solo) and then meet with a couple. worked for me, but I think viagra will be easier on me and the wife.
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