While I really enjoy watching my wife engaged in pleasure with another person--I've only had the opportunity to do so once, with two other guys--I get nearly as turned on, and in some ways more, by the prospect of her being with someone without me there. She's done it on several occasions, and yes, the jealousy about killed me the first time, but once I came to terms with it--recognizing that it was a major part of the overwhelming excitement her activity created within me--it stopped bothering me.
In fact, though she hasn't done it in years, I get extremely excited just thinking about her sleeping with a guy and then coming home and sharing the intimate details (description, appearance, smells...and other things!). It's hard to explain, but I supposed there is a largely masochistic element (which is odd, because I have zero interest in anything remotely S&M-like)--not knowing where she is, wondering what's happening, not being able to stop it once she's left, etc. But it also goes back to more traditional "sharing" aspects of swinging--enjoying the fact that she's attractive to someone else, enjoying her being sexually independent, etc.
If you can honestly say that jealousy is not an issue for you when you swing, then I have a hard time understanding why allowing your partner to play--with your knowledge and consent--would bother you. I say that without judging. I'm just confused. And curious to understand.
Having said all that, have there been threads in the past specifically about "same room vs separate room?" As the wife and I consider swinging, I've found just about every answer and discussion I've looked for on this fabulous board, except this one. And it's something she and I have slightly different opinions on and need to discuss further. Any help? |