I have to agree with what everyone else says here.
Most importantly this portion by Brit_Pair
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The other man says he wants to keep it a secret. What if he changes his mind, and tells his wife? Do you want your husband to learn about this from you, or from her?
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I've seen this all too often in the general world. One or the other gets pangs of guilt, spills the beans to the significant other, who in turn is furious and confronts the other party. I've watched many relationships disolve over these sort of affairs. Speaking from experience, my first marriage disolved over the exact same thing. In my case tho, the woman continually kept coming on to my ex, in spite of his desire to end it. Didn't matter tho, he found a new one later.
(Non-swinging days)
My suggestion is to be honest with your husband. This loss of control occured with a known swing partner, you are both guilty of it, but what is more important? Working through (hopefully) a short period of guilt, anger and humiliation for your actions, or risk losing your marriage for having hidden it?
While I agree with the others that his intentions leaned towards a plan to have sex, you also had the power to say no. In my eyes you are both equally guilty. I don't garner the belief that women are 'powerless' (for lack of better words) to say no in a non-threatening situation.
As the old adage says, "What a tangled web we weave...."
Good luck in what ever you decide.