Quote:
Originally posted by Ditto
Hi ya'all,
Please forgive this really stupid question but Mr Ditto and I have been having a disagreement that maybe ya'all could help us with.
He thinks that a man can have sex/swing and not be really attracted to the women.
On the other hand I think that most women have to be attracted to the man in order to have sex/swing.
So....... Do the ladies of the board need to feel a "Real" attraction for the guy OR is a genuine fondness for him all that is needed to make the decision to swing?
Thanks
Mrs Ditto |
Actually, Mrs. Ditto, this is a really interesting question and could be answered several different ways, depending on interpretation.
For the purpose of my own clarification, I'm defining "attraction" as liking the looks, body build, hair, etc., etc. while "fondness" is defined as liking the person for their personality, common interests, values, etc., etc.
OK...for me...like most I suspect, physical attraction is the first thing I notice in a stranger. It's either there or not. However, beyond that is the "fondness" aspect and that comes into play greatly for me. I could meet the worlds Adonis but if he didn't hold appeal for me in terms of personality, conversational ability, and many other non-physical attributes, I would not want to swing with him. Somehow...someway...people that are all of the things that I personally appreciate in people take on an attractive appearance. Maybe not immediately, but over time.
Now as for attraction, you could also be speaking of "sex appeal." Again, tho', the Adonis may have the initial sex appeal, but 2 minutes of boring conversation or the impression that he thinks he's greater than I think he is (among other things) will kill any attraction I may have initially felt.
So! Until clarified further, I vote for "fondness." - EBF
PS: I've read this 2-3 times. When I do that, it seems I've always missed the point. (Upfront disclaimer!)