I can understand exactly where you are coming from. What you have to do is communicate these feelinga to your husband and talk them thru. Jeff and I were in the exact same spot about 11 months ago.I was very insecure due to the fact that our whole married life he was never very open about certain things. He comes from a sexually repressed background and caried those "guilt" feelings with him about sex.Until we started considering the lifestyle and really talked it thru I was wondering the exact same things you were.At some point you realize that it is a risk you take but also aat another point you realize how much you want to see him with another woman. The eroticy is amazing. But you have to be absolutely sure because if you aren't it can possibly destroy your marriage.You need to have absolute trust between you. Which means if anything bothers you you have to be able to talk it thru in a coherent manner without any self consciousness.
It has taken Jeff and I about 18 motnhs of talking and meeting people to feel we are at the right place that when the right couple comes along we will take the leap into swinging. We are totally secure in this and that is what it takes..knowing you both want it, know you willalways be together and have no doubts.Doubts will chew a hole in your relationship far more then anything else..
Continue talking about everything on your mind run scerios past each other and explore how they would make you feel. Go over situation s and what wuold make you feel uncomfortable..Role Play and see where that goes..Flirt with people..explore and enjoy. If it feels right you will continue if not you will realize just the thoughts of it really rev up the sex life
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