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| Originally posted by Dionysis Wow, so this feeling isn't just for single males. Guess I don't have anything to look forward to if I do find that special someone and we want to swing. Huh, maybe couples just don't like guys period. Thats a troublesome thought. |
I would be the first to agree with you that single guys get a bad deal from many, because of ill-behavior by some. The unkind devaluation conveyed by some would understandably cause anger from you. It is demeaning to be treated as less than others for reasons whose only tie to you is your marital status. It is dehumanizing not to be viewed as a being whose individual characteristics may be equal to those who sit in judgement.
That said, there are jerks in any category of the lifestyle - single, married, male, and female. The same is true in any "straight" club, or employing company, or movie theater. Lifestyle folks are no better, no worse, and no different than any other grouping you might examine for behavior equitability.
One of the above situations could quite possibly have been avoided if more conversation had taken place prior to activity transpiring. There is not enough information about the other situation to know if the same might be true there as well.
While your attitude might be understandable, it will not serve you well to be negatively vocal in that manner. The anger is too clearly expressed to result in your desired goal. No one wants to spend time with one whose demeanor seems to say: " So are you jerks gonna let me get some, or not?"
Nothing "mean" is meant by these remarks. The majority of what has been expressed is of an understanding, agreeing and supportive nature. And a compassionate sympathy for the affect poor treatment has had on many single males. The last is meant to 'yank' your attention to the attitude you are conveying - and the negative impact of it on others. If you are feeling this strongly, perhaps it is time for a break - a little time away from your lifestyle pursuits, until you can return with a more positive nature. I know "rolling with it" can get tiresome for anyone, thus the suggested and earned temporary vacation status might be just what's needed for you.